Goodbye to Yesterday
by InvisiMeg
Summary: When tragedy strikes, Rachel finds herself in an unlikely position. Now, with her life forever changed, she has to learn how to deal with her new responsibilities while continuing to pursue her dreams.
1. My Life Got Cold

**Ever since I finished Past Mistakes I've been trying to decide what story to work on next. Finally, a little over a week ago I wrote the first chapter to three different stories and then had two people read them to get their opinions. Clearly this is the one that won out. I've had this idea for quite a long time—over a year—so I'm happy to finally be working on it.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Enjoy…**

* * *

**Chapter 1 – My Life Got Cold**

Rachel bolted upright in her bed and looked around the dark room. She was sweating profusely from a nightmare that she was already beginning to forget. Rain was still pounding against her window just as it had been when she had fallen asleep; it had been storming most of the night and she assumed it must have been a crack of thunder that had awoken her from the nightmare. Then, she heard the banging and realized someone was knocking on the front door, so she threw off her covers, and padded across the room. By the time she walked out of her bedroom, Kurt was also coming out of his, and the two of them walked toward their front door together.

"It's nearly two, this better be important," Kurt griped.

Rachel sleepily nodded in agreement as she slid the door open. She instantly became wide-awake, though, when she saw two uniformed police officers standing on her welcome mat.

"May we help you?" Rachel asked, staring wide-eyed at the man.

"Are you Rachel Berry?" the taller of the two asked, removing his cap.

"I am," Rachel replied.

"What did you do?" Kurt hissed.

Rachel scoffed. "What makes you think I did anything?"

"My name if Officer Williams and this is Officer Ryan," the taller officer informed her as they each showed their badges. "May we come in?"

"Of course," Rachel said, stepping aside to let the two men in.

"I hate to be the one that has to tell you this, but your mother was in a car accident," Officer Williams began.

"Is she—" Rachel couldn't bring herself to say it.

The officer looked down for a moment. "I'm sorry to say, but she was pronounced dead at the scene. She appears to have lost control of her car due to the rain and collided, head-on with a pickup truck."

Rachel knew the officer was still speaking, but she couldn't seem to hear him; there was a ringing in her ears and her chest felt like it was tightening. When her legs gave out, she looked to her left, and was surprised to see that Kurt was holding her up. He was whispering something to her, but she couldn't hear what he was saying either. Her best friend's arms were strong around her waist as he led her over to the chair nearest to them.

When she was finally sitting down, she tried taking deep breaths, and sipped a few drinks from the cup of water Kurt handed her. The officers were still standing nearby, looking worried for her. Kurt had his arm wrapped around her shoulder and his cheek leaning against the top of her head.

"How—" Rachel shook her head, not really knowing what to ask.

She was prepared for a lot of things in life, but this wasn't one of them. She didn't know what to ask or what to say or even how to feel. Both her body and her brain felt numb at the moment, but she knew she was probably in shock and close to a panic attack.

"You sister is at Lima Memorial," Officer Williams said, gaining Rachel's attention again.

"Oh my God, Beth," Rachel said, putting her hand over her mouth. "She was with her?"

The officer nodded. "She was fortunate; she appears to only have minor cuts and bruises, but they're holding her overnight for observation."

"I have to get home," Rachel said, pushing Kurt off, and heading toward the bedroom.

She heard Kurt saying goodbye to the officers and then his hurried footsteps going after her. She hit the button to turn her laptop on and began taping her fingers on the desk when it seemed to be taking an unusually long time for things to load.

"Rachel, honey," Kurt said, putting his hand on her shoulder.

"I have to get a flight," she stated.

"I know that, but maybe you should try to rest some more," Kurt suggested. "It's going to be a long day and you're going to be exhausted if you're running on only three hours of sleep."

"I—"

"I'll book your flight," Kurt interrupted. "I'll get one out first thing in the morning for us."

"Us?" Rachel asked, looking up at him.

"Sweetie, do you really think I'm not going with you?" Kurt asked, smiling sadly at her. "Come on; let's get you into bed."

Kurt helped her stand up and led her over to the bed, where he helped her lay down, and tucked her under the covers. He kissed her forehead and wiped some of the tears from her cheeks as he whispered, "Try to rest."

She wasn't sure when her eyes finally closed, but it was sometime after Kurt crawled into bed with her. The last things she remembered was Kurt wrapping his arms around her waist and the sound of his soft humming.

* * *

Rachel had been staring out the window, watching the clouds go by for most of the flight. Kurt was sitting next to her, and for once in his life, he was staying fairly quiet, only interrupting the silence to ask if she needed anything. She was glad he was there, though. Since they'd booked their flight at the last minute, they hadn't gotten seats near each other, but Kurt had explained the situation to the woman who was supposed to be sitting next to Rachel, and she had been nice enough to switch seats with him.

"Do you want something to drink?" Kurt asked for the tenth time in an hour.

"I'm fine," Rachel answered.

"We should be there soon," Kurt commented.

Luckily the flight was short and Kurt had gotten a direct flight to Columbus, where Rachel's fathers were going to pick them up. Kurt had been the one to call them while Rachel was in the shower; she had planned on doing it, but she kept putting it off. She'd had her phone in her hands several times, ready to call, but she couldn't seem to think of the words to say. She had never dealt with anyone in her life dying; her grandmother had passed away when she was three, but she was too young to remember it. She wasn't prepared for this—actually, she didn't know if she would ever be prepared for something like this.

She let herself cry in Kurt's arms last night, but she was still numb in many ways. It was as if it hadn't quite hit her yet, and she waiting for it to happen. She wasn't close with Shelby—she'd only come into her life four years ago—but she knew she should be feeling something right now. Rachel had never been one to not know what she was feeling, so this was a first for her.

The pilot came over the intercom and informed them to put their seatbelts on because they would be landing soon, and Rachel sighed. She hadn't been in Lima in over a year since her fathers usually came to New York, and she was not looking forward to being there now. The town didn't hold many good memories for her, and this was going to be just another thing she remembered whenever she thought about her hometown.

"Are you—" Kurt cleared his throat. "Are you going to plan a funeral?"

"I don't know," Rachel replied.

"Okay," Kurt said, nodding.

"Yes," Rachel corrected. "Someone has to, and as sad as it is, I'm her only family. Well, her only family that's over eighteen."

She kept thinking about Beth, who had already been given up by one mother, and now she had lost the only family she'd ever known. Rachel wondered if she would even remember Shelby when she grew up, and that thought made her sadder than anything. Beth was only four years old and she'd just lost everything.

"I imagine her former students would like to attend," Kurt remarked.

Rachel nodded. "I guess I'll give Jesse a call; he'll know who to get in touch with."

"If you want me to be the one to call, just let me know," Kurt said, putting his hand over hers.

"I'll do it," Rachel said, shaking her head.

The thought of telling Jesse was daunting, but she knew she should be the one to do it. They weren't exactly friends, but they did exchange the occasional email, and she knew how much Shelby meant to him. She was his mentor and almost like a second mother to him, so Rachel knew it wasn't going to be easy for him to hear, but maybe it would be easier coming from a semi friend than someone who was practically a stranger to him.

As they began their descent, Rachel gripped the armrests; it was the part she hated most about flying. She didn't like not being in control, so she hated to feel like she was falling. Part of her had been feeling like she was falling since last night, though, and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

* * *

The moment they were out of the airport, she spotted Hiram next to his car, and he ran over, wrapping his arm around her. It turned out that only he was picking Rachel and Kurt up while Leroy remained at the hospital with Beth. Rachel was glad he was there for the little girl since no one else was.

It was a two hour drive from the airport to Lima, and it was largely silent. Hiram had tried to make small talk at first, but he eventually realized she wasn't in the mood to talk, so he and Kurt talked a little bit before they both grew silent. Rachel felt a little bit better with her father by her side; sometimes she forgot how much she missed her fathers. Finding out about Shelby was a reminder that life was short, and she realized that she really needed to call home more. She couldn't imagine what it would be like to lose either one of them, and she didn't want to regret anything when that day finally came.

"Would you like to go to the house and drop off your luggage first or do you want to head to the hospital?" Hiram asked.

Rachel looked back at Kurt, but he just shrugged, so she answered, "Hospital."

Hiram nodded and turned left, going toward the hospital. It was a short drive, and he spent longer circling around the parking lot, trying to find a spot than he did driving there. He eventually found a spot near the back of the parking lot and pulled in, putting the car in park. Rachel took a deep breath and got out of the car, waiting on Kurt and her father to join her. Together, the three walked to the building and went inside; Hiram knew the way, so the other two followed him down several halls, and stopped just outside a door.

"Do you want us to go in with you?" Hiram asked.

Rachel nodded her head, and Hiram opened the door for her; Leroy was inside and stood the moment he saw his daughter. He took the remaining steps to her and his arms were around her in an instant. His arms were comforting just as they had always been, and the smell of his familiar cologne made her relax a little.

"How is Beth?" Rachel asked, looking at her.

"The doctors think she's going to be just fine," Hiram replied, pulling away, and looking at the sleeping girl. "They told me she was awake most of the night, but she's finally sleeping now." He sighed. "Hopefully she won't remember any of this."

"How are you holding up, honey?" Leroy asked.

Rachel shrugged. "I'm alright, I guess. I sort of feel like I'm in a dream and I keep waiting for myself to wake up."

"I know how you feel," Hiram said, putting his around her shoulder. "You know my mom died when I was still in college; I think it took me over a year before it really sank in. One day I was doing grocery shopping and something reminded me of her—I broke down in the aisle and your father had to drive to the store to get me."

"Hiram, I don't believe this is the time," Leroy said, giving his husband a look.

Rachel smiled slightly. "It's fine."

It was actually a little refreshing; Kurt was walking on eggshells around her, and it was nice for someone to be talking to her like nothing had changed even though so much had.

"What's going to happen to her?" Rachel wondered aloud as her eyes drifted to Beth.

"Well—" Leroy was cut off by a knock on the door and they both turned as it opened.

"Noah," Rachel said, surprised to see her former classmate.

"I—" Puck's eyes glanced toward Beth and he nodded toward the hall. "This is probably a bad time, but can we talk?"

"Go on, sweetie," Hiram said, squeezing her shoulder.

She gave her fathers a sad smile and walked to the door; when she walked into the hall, she found Puck pacing in the nearby waiting room. She watched him for moment and realized how sad and worried he looked. He was usually so cocky and acted like nothing touched him, but she could see how much this was bothering him. She tried to forget the little fling he had with Shelby, and she had always assumed it didn't mean much to him, but now she was wondering if she was wrong about that.

"You wanted to talk," she said, wrapping her arms around herself.

"How are you doing?" he asked. "Never mind; that's a stupid question."

"Why are you here?" Rachel asked.

"I wanted to make sure Beth was alright," Puck replied. "I know I'm not really her dad, but I just—I needed to see. I think I needed to see if you were alright, too. We've never really been friends, but I know you, you know?"

Rachel nodded and sat down in one of the ugly, uncomfortable chairs. "I forgot how fast news travels in Lima; I can't say I'm not surprised to see you here."

"Kurt called Burt to let him know he was coming," Puck replied. "Burt told Finn and Finn called me. I let Quinn know; I thought she'd want to know. Sorry, I know you're not her biggest fan."

"I have no ill feelings toward Quinn and I never have," Rachel stated. "She's the one that never seemed to like me very much."

Puck sat down and leaned forward with his elbows on her knees. "She asked me what's going to happen to Beth and I didn't know what to tell her. So, do you know?"

Rachel shook her head. "I don't know, Noah; I don't really know how this works."

Puck nodded as he stood up. "Will you let me know when the funeral's gonna be? Or at least tell Kurt to tell Finn to tell me."

"Yeah," Rachel replied.

"Thanks." Puck started walking away but turned around again. "I'm really sorry."

Rachel smiled sadly at him. "Thank you, Noah."

He shoved his hands in his pockets, gave her a nod, and turned around, walking down the hall. Rachel gave herself a moment to sit there before she stood up and walked back to Beth's room.

* * *

Rachel jolted awake and looked around groggily; for a moment she thought maybe everything was a dream, but then she realized she was in a hospital room.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," Kurt said from beside her. "I thought you might like some coffee."

"How long have I been asleep?" Rachel asked, gratefully taking the cup from him.

"An hour or so," Kurt replied. "And I also apologize for the coffee; it's not very good, but it's better than nothing."

Rachel sat up straighter as she took a sip; she made a face the moment her taste buds registered what was in her mouth. Kurt was right about it not being good—she would be more inclined to say it was terrible—but he was also right about it being better than nothing. She was exhausted and this would keep her going a little longer. It was only the afternoon, but she had barely slept at all the previous night. She tried at Kurt's insistence, but her mind wouldn't shut off long enough for her to drift off.

After talking to Puck she had gone into Beth's room and told her fathers they should go to work. There was no point in them missing when she was there and could sit in the room just as well as they could. She must not have been in there long before she drifted off, curled up in one of the chairs. It was probably the most uninterrupted sleep she had gotten since being awoken by the police.

"There's a man here to see you," Kurt said, sitting on the arm of the chair.

"Who?" Rachel asked, looking up at him.

Kurt shrugged. "I didn't ask."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Thanks, Kurt."

Rachel stood up, took another drink of her terrible coffee, and walked toward the door. She looked over her shoulder and Kurt had already taken her vacated seat. She wondered how much longer Beth would be asleep; she would rather be there when she woke up since the little girl didn't know Kurt. Turning, she opened the door and walked into the hall to see what this man wanted. It was easy to spot him; he was the only one in the hallways that wasn't in scrubs; he was actually wearing a nice suit, though he looked a little disheveled.

"Hello," Rachel said, stopping a few feet from the man.

"Rachel Berry?" he asked and she nodded. "You look just like her." He gave her a smile. "I wish we were meeting under better circumstances. I'm Alexander Wyatt; I was friends with Shelby and her lawyer."

"Is that why you're here?" Rachel asked.

"We can discuss this later if you would like, but I'm more here as her friend," he continued. "When she adopted Beth, she asked me to take care of things in case anything were to happen to her. As you probably know, she had no family other than you and Beth, so she wanted to split everything between you."

"That's—" Rachel didn't know what to say.

Mr. Wyatt gave her a sympathetic smile. "I don't think she ever thought it would happen this soon, which is why the next part is not ideal, but it's what she wanted. She wanted you to be the one to have Beth if she were to die before she turned eighteen. You being young yourself, though—"

"Wait," Rachel interrupted. "She wanted me to have Beth?"

"As I said, you were her only family, and she wanted her to remain with family," he continued.

"Does this mean Beth is mine now?" Rachel asked, feeling very overwhelmed.

"No, a judge has to grant the request," he replied. "And nothing will happen unless you wish it to, which is why I am telling you this now. If you want to try to become Beth's guardian, I can file the paperwork. I know you're going through a lot right now, but the sooner we do it, the better. Shelby didn't want her to end up in foster care, and without any other family—"

"That's where she'll end up," Rachel finished.

"I know you already have a lot to think about, but I'm asking you to think about this," he said, pulling out his card. "You can call me anytime." He sighed. "I'm sorry about Shelby, and I'm sorry I had to put even more stress on you."

"No, it's—" Rachel shook her head. "I understand."

Alexander nodded to her and walked down the hallway, leaving her alone. Rachel turned and went back into the hospital room; Kurt was sitting exactly where she had left him and Beth still seemed to be asleep. She watched the little girl for a moment before coming the rest of the way into the room, alerting her presence to her friend.

"How'd it go?" Kurt asked.

"His name is Alexander Wyatt; he is—was her friend and her lawyer," Rachel stated. "He told me that Shelby left me and Beth everything and—she wanted me to be Beth's guardian in the event of her death."

Kurt's jaw fell open. "Did you—what did you tell him?"

"I didn't really tell him anything," Rachel replied. "He gave me his card and asked me to think about it."

"What are you going to do?" Kurt asked, furrowing his brows.

Rachel took a deep breath before saying, "I guess I'm going to think about it."

* * *

**As I've posted on tumblr, the next chapter will be up Tuesday, which will be the normal posting day for this. If you want to know when a chapter is going to be posted for any of my stories, I do keep a schedule on tumblr; I use the same name as on here or the link is in my profile if you wish to find it.**

**Please leave a review and let me know what you thought.**


	2. Things Will Never Be the Same Again

**Okay, to address things that have been brought up more than once. First off, someone complained about me writing that Beth would have no family…legally, Puck and Quinn (and Rachel for that matter) are not her family. They gave her up, so they have absolutely no rights. Rachel feels like Beth is family because she's Rachel and she wouldn't care that she's legally not her sister; she feels like she is. Shelby also thought of Rachel as family even though her parents are legally Hiram and Leroy.**

**Quite a few people have also asked about where this falls; as you can probably guess by the fact that Rachel and Quinn are not friends, it isn't completely canon. A lot of the things from the show have also happened in this story except for the fact that Rachel didn't really become close with anyone or accepted by them (with the obvious exception of Kurt). So, she never became friends with Quinn in any way. Most other things will be the same, though, unless I feel that they wouldn't have happened due to my change of Rachel not being friends with characters.**

**That being said, Quinn isn't just going to show up and be all "sorry about Shelby", so it will be a little while before she shows up. Be patient, though, because this is obviously a Faberry story, but I didn't want to be unrealistic by rushing her appearance.**

**Okay, I think that's it. Thank you to everyone that has already reviewed, favorited, or followed. You guys are awesome.**

* * *

**Chapter 2 – Things Will Never Be the Same Again**

Rachel and Kurt had been sitting in silence for at least an hour; Rachel was trying to ignore the looks Kurt kept throwing her way, but it was becoming more and more difficult. It was as if he thought she was going to make a decision right then and there, and he was waiting for her to announce it at any moment. This wasn't that easy, though; Rachel was trying to go through everything in her head, but with all the other thoughts going through her mind and dealing with the fact that her biological mother had just died, it was even harder than it sounded. She had a lot to think about and Kurt staring at her wasn't helping anything.

"Kurt, stop staring at me," Rachel finally snapped.

"I'm sorry," Kurt said, looking away.

"I know you're just being a concerned friend, but it's really not helping me think," Rachel said, rubbing her temples.

"Maybe it would help if we discussed it," Kurt said.

Rachel didn't want to discuss it; she was usually pragmatic when it came to this type of thing, but for once in her life, she just wanted to ignore everything and hope it went away. That wasn't realistic, though, and time was of the essence. She couldn't put aside thinking about the funeral and she couldn't put aside thinking about Beth.

"Rach?" Kurt said, looking at her when she didn't say anything.

Rachel sighed. "I don't know, Kurt."

"What don't you know?" Kurt asked.

"Everything," Rachel said, shrugging. "I don't know how to plan a funeral and I don't know how to take care of a four year old and I don't know how to deal with everything."

"I know what it's like—maybe not to this extent, but I know what it's like to lose a parent," Kurt replied. "No one is ever ready for something like this to happen, but you're Rachel Berry—you've always been able to handle everything with grace, and I think this is going to be no exception."

Rachel smiled slightly. "That's not true and you know it."

Kurt sighed. "Do I argue when you're giving one of your pep talks?"

"Sorry," Rachel replied.

"So, what's next?" Kurt asked.

"Well, I need to plan the funeral, which I know nothing about," Rachel replied. "Hopefully my fathers can be of some assistance."

"I'm sure they'll know what to do," Kurt said with a nod. "In fact, if I had to guess, I would say they are probably looking into everything right now to save you from having to do it."

"Probably," Rachel replied, thinking it sounded exactly like her fathers.

Beth began to stir slightly; Rachel and Kurt both grew silent as they watched her turn over. Rachel thought maybe she was going to wake up, but her breathing became steady again as she drifted deeper into sleep. She wondered if it was a good thing that the little girl was sleeping so much, but it had been a traumatic night, so maybe it was a good thing.

"What's going to happen to her?" Kurt asked. "You know—if you decide—"

"If I don't take her?" Rachel finished for him.

"Yeah," Kurt softly said.

"I suppose she'll end up in foster care if there's no one else," Rachel replied. "Of course, Mr. Wyatt said there is no guarantee a judge would even grant the request if I were to decide I would like to be Beth's guardian. I'm only nineteen, and the judge may decide I'm too young for such a responsibility."

"It's better than the alternative, though," Kurt said, frowning. "What would happen if her birth parents want her?"

"That's something to ask the lawyer," Rachel replied.

"Too bad one of us didn't apply to law school," Kurt joked.

"That would be very helpful right about now," Rachel agreed.

Kurt nodded. "I know this is probably one of the furthest things from your mind, but did you let NYADA know you're going to be absent for a while?"

Rachel groaned. "No, I didn't even think to. What am I going to do? I have my showcase in two weeks! There are going to be a lot of people there—producers, teachers, all of my peers; if I don't do well—"

"Rachel!" Kurt interrupted. "Don't stress about it, okay? I'm sure they will understand and give you an extension. You don't need to worry about this now on top of everything else."

Rachel took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. "You're right. I'll send my teachers an email explaining what's happened. Surely they will understand."

"How about I call them?" Kurt said, putting his hand over Rachel's. "I'll let them know what is going on and that you will be unable to attend classes for at least the next week, but we'll keep them updated on the situation. This will give you some time to think without me staring at you." Kurt smiled at her. "Would you like me to bring you some coffee when I come back?"

"Thank you," Rachel said, giving him a sad smile. "And yes—to both questions."

"I'll be back in a little bit," Kurt said, squeezing her hand as he stood.

Rachel was grateful she had Kurt to help her through this time; she couldn't imagine not having a friend with her. Since they became friends their junior year of high school, he had always been there for her; at this point, he was really more like family than a friend. Once this was all over she was going to have to find a way to thank him.

* * *

"Rachel, sweetie."

"What?" Rachel mumbled into her pillow.

"It's almost noon."

Rachel eyes flew open and she looked at Leroy like he was crazy. "Noon?"

"You've been asleep for nearly sixteen hours," her father stated.

Rachel put her face back into her pillow and groaned; there was no way she had slept that long. It would explain the headache, though, and why she felt like she had been trampled.

"Why did you let me sleep this long?" she asked.

Leroy laughed. "Your father tried to wake you three hours ago, but you just mumbled something and put your pillow over your head, so he assumed you were not ready to get up."

She knew she had been exhausted the previous day, but this was ridiculous. She and Kurt had finally come to the Berry house the previous evening after Beth had been released from the hospital. Since she had no immediate family and no one had stepped forward to get temporary custody, Beth had been taken by social services. She hated the thought of the little girl being taken like that, but Rachel didn't know what to do.

"Kurt told us everything, honey," Leroy said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Oh," Rachel responded with a nod.

By the time she had gotten home, she was in no mood to talk; she was even more overwhelmed by everything at that point and she just wanted time to think. So, she had gone to her room to try to sort through her thoughts, but it hadn't taken long for the exhaustion to overtake her. She thought Kurt had gone home right after they got there, but she must have been wrong. Part of her was relieved, though; it meant her fathers had time to digest the information before discussing things with her, and maybe they would have some better insight into her situation.

"We contacted Shelby's lawyer to see just what was going on, and also to see if he knew what Shelby's final wishes were regarding her burial" Leroy stated. "Before we get into that, though, you must be starving; Kurt said you didn't eat anything all day yesterday."

"I don't have much of an appetite," Rachel replied.

"I know, sweetie, but you should eat," Leroy said, standing up. "You father's made breakfast, so at least come down and eat a little something, okay?"

"Breakfast?" Rachel asked. "Don't you mean lunch?"

"Actually, I mean breakfast," Leroy said, smiling. "Hiram made blueberry pancakes."

Rachel smiled; it was her favorite. "In that case, I guess I will eat."

"He thought it might get you to," Leroy said, holding his hand out to help his daughter out of bed. "There is a method to our madness."

"I'll be down in a moment," Rachel said.

Leroy nodded. "Take your time. You know where to find us."

Rachel went to the bathroom and checked herself over in the mirror; her makeup was smeared, so she decided to remove it before she headed downstairs. Despite the long sleep, she had bags under her eyes as if she had hardly slept at all. She really looked terrible, but she didn't care enough at the moment to do much about it. Turning off the light, she walked out of the bathroom and headed for the kitchen.

Hiram and Leroy were both sitting at the table despite the fact that they were both supposed to be at work. She was about to mention it when Hiram put his paper down and looked at her.

"Don't even tell us to go to work," Hiram stated. "We have both taken off for the rest of the week, so there's no point in arguing with us. Now, sit down and eat your pancakes before they get too cold."

Rachel sat down since she knew arguing with them would be futile, and accepted the plate of pancakes with a smile as she said, "Thank you."

"It's what fathers are for," Hiram said with a smile back as he picked up his newspaper.

Rachel knew they wanted to talk to her; she could tell by their glances and the fact that they were both fidgeting that they were having trouble holding in the questions. As much as she didn't want to talk about it, she knew it would happen sooner or later, and she would enjoy her pancakes more if they weren't constantly glancing at her.

"What did you talk to the lawyer about?" Rachel asked, getting right to the point.

"Don't you want to eat first?" Leroy asked.

"I can talk while I'm eating," Rachel replied.

"Well, he said that Shelby wanted a simple ceremony and she wanted to be buried near her parents," Hiram said, putting his newspaper down. "Other than that, all other decisions are left open."

"I take it you know about Beth," Rachel said.

"We do," Leroy said, looking at Hiram. "I can't say I'm very happy with Shelby for putting you in this situation without discussing it with you first." He shook his head. "It isn't fair that she did this to you, and your father and I would completely understand if you were not ready for this kind of responsibility. You're barely a grownup yourself, after all."

Rachel nodded; she always knew she would have her fathers' full support no matter what she decided. That's just how they were, and she knew if she did decide to try to get custody of Beth, they would be there every step of the way, and they would do everything they could to help her if the judge granted her request for guardianship.

"If Shelby wanted a simple ceremony, that's what we'll do," Rachel said, ignoring the other issue.

"I've already made some calls," Hiram said, grabbing a small notebook that had been sitting next to him. "I have a list of funeral homes and other things that will be needed; if you want us to make the arrangements, we will do so, or you can look over them and decide for yourself. Either way, it should probably be done tonight."

"I will do it," Rachel said, and Hiram handed her the notebook.

"If you need any help or want someone to talk to, you know we're here," Leroy said.

"I know," Rachel replied.

* * *

"We're going now; will you be okay?" Leroy said, popping his head into the living. "One of us can stay here if you would like."

"I'll be okay," Rachel said, shaking her head.

"Okay," Leroy replied. "Call us if you need anything."

Rachel didn't know where her fathers were going, but she knew it had to do something with finding a caterer. Her fathers thought it would be a good idea to have everyone over after the funeral as a sort of celebration of her life and Rachel agreed. She wasn't as close to Shelby as she had always wished she would be one day, but she didn't hold a grudge against her. It hurt when Shelby had essentially rejected her after abruptly coming into her life during Rachel's sophomore year, but she had moved past that, and she thought it would be a lovely idea to celebrate Shelby's life.

She had no idea how many people would show up, but Rachel had contacted Jesse and he was going to get in touch with the other former members of Vocal Adrenaline. Jesse had been rightfully shocked and upset by the news of Shelby's passing. They had talked on the phone for nearly an hour, and Jesse said he was going to catch a flight out in the morning. She had almost forgotten how much she enjoyed talking to Jesse and promised herself she would do better to keep in touch with him.

Rachel was staring at the funeral details when the doorbell rang. She sighed, standing up, and walked to the door. She looked through the peephole and was shocked to see her ex-boyfriend standing on the other side of the door; she hadn't seen or spoken to Finn in years and she had no idea why he was here.

"Finn," Rachel said as she opened the door. "What are you doing here?"

"I heard about Shelby," Finn said, shrugging his shoulder. "I just—I thought I would see how you were doing."

Rachel smiled slightly and stepped to the side. "I must say I'm surprised you came."

"I didn't know if I should," Finn admitted. "I know we haven't talked since you left for New York, but we were sort of friends once, and I know how much it sucks to lose a parent. I mean, I was too young to know what was going on when my dad died, but I just—I needed to make sure you were okay."

"Would you like anything to drink?" Rachel asked as she led him into the living room.

"I'm good," Finn said, shaking his head. "Thanks, though."

"Does Kurt know you're here?" Rachel asked.

Finn laughed. "No, I don't think he would have let me come if he knew."

Rachel figured Kurt didn't know; if he had, he would have at least given her a heads-up that Finn was on his way. And as Finn said, he probably would have stopped him from coming over altogether.

"How are things going?" Finn asked as he took a seat. "Other than—you know."

"Everything had been going well," Rachel replied.

Finn smiled. "That's what Burt said; he told me you have some showcase coming up."

"I do, but hopefully I will be able to postpone it or I don't know how well I will do," Rachel replied.

"You'll probably do great either way," Finn said.

Rachel looked down, not really knowing what to say to him; she hadn't talked to him in nearly two years, and it was strange that he was here. He was one of the last people she expected to appear—right up there with Santana or Quinn.

"You know—" Finn stopped talking and looked around. "I still care about you."

Rachel really didn't know how to respond to this. "That's sweet, Finn."

"I know we broke up two years ago, but I still miss you," Finn continued. "Sometimes I think we made a mistake then; maybe we could have worked out, you know?"

Rachel sighed. "Finn—"

"I'm sorry," Finn interrupted. "This isn't what I meant to come here and say. I really did just want to check on you because I still care about you—that's all I wanted to say."

"I appreciate it, Finn," Rachel said honestly.

"I should go," Finn said, standing up.

"Thank you for stopping by," Rachel said, walking up to him, and giving him a hug.

"If you need anything, my phone number hasn't changed," Finn said, returning her hug.

With one last smile her way, Finn turned and headed for the front door. Rachel stayed where she was, still a little shocked that he even stopped by to begin with. They hadn't exactly ended on the best terms—he had been the one to do the breaking up—but looking back on it now, it was for the best. Finn was convinced he was going to be in Lima his whole life, so he did nothing to change that, and wanted Rachel to be there with him. However, her plans always involved moving to New York City after she graduated, and he wasn't happy that she wouldn't change those plans for him. She realized now that their relationship was never a healthy one; he generally cared more about his popularity and the negative effect she was having on it than he did her.

Rachel was still standing there when the doorbell rang again; she walked over, expecting Finn to have come back, but Kurt was on her doorstep this time as she opened the door.

"Did I just pass Finn's truck?"

"Probably," Rachel replied. "He stopped by."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Rachel replied, smiling at his concern for her.

"What did my dear stepbrother want?" Kurt asked, walking inside, and closing the door behind him.

"He just wanted to check on me," Rachel said, leaving out the rest of the details. "I didn't think you were coming over tonight."

Kurt shrugged and held up a plastic bag. "I thought we could pig out on junk food and watch a movie or two. I even got that ice cream you love so much."

Rachel smiled; she still had a lot of decisions to make for the funeral, but maybe a movie was just the thing she needed. Kurt knew it was the one thing that never failed to make her feel better, and she was happy he had come over because she could definitely use the distraction and the cheering up.

* * *

Watching a movie with Kurt turned into watching two movies with Kurt, and by the time they finished the second movie, her fathers were home with dinner. They invited Kurt to stay and eat with them—luckily they had gotten extra food because Hiram couldn't make up his mind about what he wanted from the Chinese restaurant—and he had accepted their invitation. When Kurt left, it was much later than Rachel had realized and she had to get to work planning the funeral.

She had been staring at the details for far too long; she wished Shelby had left more detailed instructions because she had no idea which funeral home she would prefer or anything else. Eventually Rachel began going with her gut; she and Shelby were alike in a lot of ways, so she mostly went with what she would like, hoping it was also what Shelby would like. By the time she had selected everything, she was growing tired even though she had slept so late into the day.

The longer she sat at the table, staring at everything, the more she realized how little she knew about Shelby. She wasn't aware that Shelby had no family; Rachel always assumed she probably had aunts and uncles and cousins that she had never met, but hoped to one day. Rachel also always hoped that one day she would get the chance to have a relationship with her mother. She knew it wouldn't be a typical relationship between mother and daughter, but she at least hoped they could become friends one day. As it was, though, they had barely spoken in the past year—just the occasional email—and she hadn't seen her in person since Shelby unexpectedly stopped by NYADA one day because she was in the city.

Now, that would never change; Shelby was gone and Rachel no longer had the chance to get to know her. She no longer had the chance to become friends with her or ask her all the things she'd always wanted to ask.

As bad as it was for her, Rachel felt even sorrier for Beth. The little girl would be lucky if she even remembered Shelby and that made Rachel sad. She knew how much Shelby loved Beth, but now she wasn't going to be there to watch her grow up. Beth was only four years old and she was completely alone in the world.

"Are you okay, sweetie?"

Rachel looked up to find Leroy looking at her in concern. "Yes.

"You're crying," Leroy stated.

"Oh," Rachel said, wiping her tears away. "I didn't even notice."

"Maybe you should take a break," Leroy said, putting his hand on her shoulder.

"I'm think I'm done," Rachel said, handing Leroy all the details.

Leroy nodded. "I will make all the calls tomorrow."

"Thank you," Rachel said, grateful that she wasn't going to have to be the one to do it.

"Would you like some ice cream?" Leroy asked, setting the notepad on the island as he walked toward the refrigerator.

"Shelby wanted me to raise Beth if she wasn't around to do it," Rachel said aloud, staring at the table.

Leroy looked a little confused. "Yes."

"Do you think I can do it?" Rachel asked.

"I've always believed you can do anything," Leroy replied.

"I can't let her be alone," Rachel said. "I don't want her to go to complete strangers. Shelby wanted me to raise her—she thought I was good enough to raise her daughter. If that's what she wanted, I'm going to try. I'm going to petition to be Beth's guardian."

"You're sure about this?" Leroy asked.

"I'm very sure," Rachel replied.

Rachel had never been more sure of anything. It was as if it finally hit her—she couldn't let Beth end up in foster care and she didn't want complete strangers taking care of her. Rachel was young, but she knew she could do this. She knew her fathers would be there every step of the way, and though they hadn't discussed it, she knew Kurt would be there to help too. She had people in her life that loved her and that's exactly what she wanted Beth to have as well.

"Well, you know we'll be there for you and do everything we can to help," Leroy said, smiling at her.

"I'm counting on it," Rachel said, laughing lightly. "I don't know if I can do this alone."

"You won't have to," Leroy stated.

Rachel took a deep breath and grabbed her phone. "I need to make a call."

"And I'll inform Hiram of your decision," Leroy said.

Rachel headed straight for her bedroom, where she had put Mr. Wyatt's card on her desk. She knew it was a bit late to be calling, but he did tell her that she could call at any time, and she knew the sooner they started this, the better. She picked up the card and stared at it for a moment; she knew she was doing the right thing, but it didn't make it any less scary. With a determined nod to herself, she quickly dialed his number and listened as it rang.

After the fourth ring, he finally answered and said, "Alexander Wyatt speaking."

"Mr. Wyatt, it's Rachel Berry," she said into the phone.

"Hello, Miss Berry," he replied.

"I've made up my mind and I decided I want Beth," Rachel stated.

"You're sure?" he asked.

"Completely," Rachel replied.

"Well then, I'll start the paperwork," Mr. Wyatt said.

"So, I just wait?" Rachel asked.

"I will call you tomorrow with the details," he replied. "As I said before, just because Shelby wanted you to be the child's guardian, it doesn't mean a judge will necessarily grant the request. You're not ideal because you are so young, but they will take her wishes into consideration and decide what is best in this situation."

"I understand," Rachel said. "I needed to try, though. I don't think I would be able to forgive myself if I didn't."

They said their goodbyes and Rachel ended the call; she stared at her phone for a moment before bringing it to her chest. It was amazing to her how much life could change so quickly. Two days ago her biggest concern was the showcase and now she was planning a funeral and trying to become the guardian to a child. Everything had changed in an instant and she knew life was never going to be the same.

* * *

**Thanks again for all the comments; feel free to keep them coming because they are very much appreciated.**


	3. Life's Too Short

**Maggie's Love: It would be easier on me if everyone felt that way. Thank you for having faith in me…it's good to know at least one person does lol.**

* * *

**Chapter 3 – Life's Too Short**

Rachel stared at her dress in the mirror; it was the third one she had put on, but she still didn't know if it was the right one. She doubted anyone would really notice what she was wearing or judge her for it, but she still felt like she needed to get this right. She wanted to look her best out of respect for Shelby. Logically she knew it didn't really matter, but it still felt like it was important, so she was going to keep trying on clothes until something felt right.

And she didn't think this dress was right. She sighed and removed it, grabbing the first thing she had tried on; it was a simple black dress and she wanted to see what it looked like again. She put the dress on for a second time and was looking at it in the mirror when there was a light knock on her door.

"Come in," she said as she looked at herself.

"I just wanted to check on you," Leroy said as he poked his head into the room.

"I'm fine," Rachel said. "Just trying to find the right dress."

Whether she was fine or not was debatable, but she didn't want her father to worry. Truthfully, Rachel was still feeling fairly numb to everything. She didn't know if she was still in a bit of shock or what was going on, but other than a few random tears here and there, the only time she really cried was the few hours after receiving the news. Rachel was used to crying—she seemed to do it all the time while performing an emotional song—but now that she should be crying, she wasn't.

"Are you going to wear that one?" Leroy asked, coming all the way into the room.

"I don't know," Rachel replied. "Does it look alright?"

"It looks lovely," Leroy said.

Rachel hummed as she looked into the mirror; it was definitely better than the last thing she had put on. She wished she had brought more choices with her, but she really only brought the three. Most of the clothes in her closet were things she had worn in high school and she wasn't about to wear one of them.

"Are you really fine?" Leroy asked.

Rachel sighed. "I don't know. I feel like I should be sadder."

"The way you are feeling is perfectly normal," Leroy assured her. "People react to death differently; there isn't a correct way to feel. Some people cry, some people don't feel anything, and some people make jokes—none of them are any less right than the other."

Rachel nodded. "Thank you."

"Are you almost ready?" Leroy asked.

"Yes," Rachel replied. "I'll be down in a minute."

"Take your time," Leroy said before leaving the room.

As she looked in the mirror, she knew this still wasn't the right dress, but the one she really wanted was in her closet in New York, so this would have to do. The previous day Kurt had suggested going shopping as a way to take her mind off things and she was really starting to wish she had taken him up on his offer. It would have been a nice distraction and maybe she could have found something better to wear. It was too late for that now, though; this was going to have to do.

She looked at the clock on her nightstand and realized they were going to be late if she took much more time, and they couldn't be late. She grabbed her purse from under her discarded dresses on the bed and headed out. Normally she would never leave her room in such a state, but she didn't want to be rude and disrespectful by showing up late.

"Hiram," Leroy called out to his husband.

"Are you going?" Hiram asked, walking into the foyer.

"Yes," Rachel replied. "I'm finally ready."

Leroy smiled at Rachel and offered her his arm; she looped her arm through his and he kissed the side of her head. At least she had her fathers to help her through this.

* * *

They were the first three to arrive at the funeral home, and Rachel was happy to see that they were not late. As she walked inside, her eyes immediately fell on the casket at the front of the room; the lid on it was shut since they opted for a closed casket. There had been some debate about what type of funeral it would be. Much like Rachel, one of Shelby's parents was Jewish while the other was not. Rachel knew from one of her emails that Shelby celebrated both the Jewish and Christian holidays, so she had no idea what type of ceremony Shelby would have liked. Instead of going with one type, Rachel decided to go with a sort of hybrid to honor both sides of Shelby.

"Will you be okay?" Leroy asked.

Rachel nodded but didn't say anything. Leroy squeezed her shoulder, and he and Hiram walked off; Rachel guessed they were going to find the funeral director, but she didn't really know. Instead of going with them, she stood at the back of the room for several minutes. Finally, she took a deep breath and walked up the aisle.

She stopped just short of the casket and stared at it for a moment before looking at the flowers that adorned the top. She had no idea what type of flower they were; she only asked the florist to make sure they were purple—Shelby's favorite color—and left the rest up to her. They were beautiful, though, and Rachel was happy she left it up to the florist.

"Rachel Berry," a voice sounded from the other side of the room, and Rachel turned to find Jesse St. James.

"Hello, Jesse," Rachel greeted.

It had been a while since she had seen Jesse; his hair was a bit shorter, but he still looked the same. He was smiling sadly as he walked up to her, and he immediately wrapped his arms around her. She put her hand on his chest and closed her eyes as she returned the hug. It was nice to have a familiar face around, and even though they were more acquaintances now than friends, she felt safe in his arms.

"I'm glad you're here," Rachel said.

"I wish I didn't have to be," Jesse replied.

"I wish none of us had to be," Rachel said, sighing.

"I can't believe she's gone," he said, releasing her from the hug. "I just talked to her last week; we talked about Nationals coming up. She was thinking of coming to New York to watch us, and she talked about stopping by to see you."

"Really?" Rachel asked.

"It's too bad she won't be around to see Vocal Adrenaline beat the New Directions," Jesse commented. "I'm sure she would have enjoyed it as much as I'm going to."

Rachel couldn't help but laugh; it seemed like every time they spoke—apparently even at wakes—it always came back to their old Glee Club rivalry. It was nice having a bit of normalcy in an otherwise abnormal week, though.

"What's the chances this place has coffee?" Jesse asked.

"I think there is a room downstairs with food," Rachel commented.

"Would you care to join me?" he asked.

Rachel thought of declining since she should be around in case people came in, but she knew her fathers were around and would probably be back anytime. "Coffee sounds nice, actually."

"After you," Jesse said, motioning for her.

* * *

A few minutes after going downstairs with Jesse, Hiram came looking for her. He told her to take all the time she needed, though, and he would go upstairs. It was nice talking to Jesse and she was surprised at how quickly time went by. He had never been one to get very emotional, and while she knew he was sad about Shelby, he tended to talk about other things, which is what she needed at the moment. While they were downstairs, other people came in and out of the room; the ones that knew who she was offered their condolences, but they were mostly left to themselves. Eventually, Rachel knew she needed to go back up; part of her wished she could hide in this room for the remainder of the time, though.

When she went back upstairs, there were considerably more people in the room—which wasn't saying much since it had only been her and Jesse. There were several dozen people there now, most of which she had never seen in her life. Quite a few of them were younger and she assumed most of them had been former students of Shelby's. As she made her way toward the middle of the room, she spotted Kurt with Burt and Carole, and turned to join them.

"There you are," Kurt said as soon as he saw her. "I was wondering where you were hiding."

"I was downstairs with Jesse," Rachel replied.

Kurt didn't look impressed; he and Jesse had never really gotten along.

"How are you holding up?" Carole asked, giving her a quick hug.

"I'm not actually sure," Rachel admitted.

"It's to be expected," Burt said, putting his hand on her shoulder. "This isn't easy, but you have people around that love you, so don't you forget that. And if you ever need anything, you know we're here for you. We all know what it's like to go through this, so if you need anything—even if it's just to talk—you know where to find us."

"Hey," Finn said from behind her.

"We're going to go say hello to your dads," Carole said, grabbing Burt's arm, and pulling him away.

"That was subtle," Kurt mumbled to Rachel.

"Are you coming, Kurt?" Carole asked over her shoulder.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "I'll be back in a moment."

Rachel turned to the tall boy and was instantly pulled into a hug. She was a little surprised he was here; she was only expecting Kurt to come, not the whole Hudson-Hummel clan.

"I was unaware you were coming," Rachel commented.

Finn shrugged as he let her go. "I didn't know if you'd want me here, but I came anyway in case you did."

"I'm glad you're here," she said being completely truthful.

"Good," Finn said, smiling. "So, umm, how long are you staying in Lima? Are you heading back after tomorrow or are you going to be around for a couple of days? Because I was thinking maybe we could have dinner—or lunch, whatever you're more comfortable with. Maybe even just coffee, but I thought maybe we could catch up. No interior motives, I promise."

"Ulterior," Rachel corrected. "And we'll see, okay? I'm not sure how long I'm going to be here, but I do have something to take care of before I go back."

"That's cool; just let me know," Finn replied.

Rachel nodded and watched as Kurt began making his way over to her. She could see him watching them closely from the moment he left, and she was surprised he had shown this much restraint. She didn't know what he was afraid of, though; she and Finn were over a long time ago, and Kurt should know she no longer had feelings for the boy.

"How are things over here?" Kurt asked with a very fake smile.

"I was just about to join mom and Burt," Finn said.

"You do that," Kurt replied.

"Later, Rachel," Finn said before turning and walking away.

"You know, you don't have to get concerned every time I speak with Finn," Rachel stated.

"I'm just making sure you're not going to make the same mistakes you've made in the past," Kurt replied. "I know under normal circumstances you would never go there again, but it's a stressful time and you may be more inclined to do certain things, and I don't want you to do something you're going to regret later."

"While I appreciate your concern, you have nothing to worry about," Rachel said. "My relationship with Finn is in the past—a past that I have no desire of repeating. Now if you'll excuse me for a moment, I see something I need to speak with."

For the first time, Rachel noticed Puck on the other side of the room, and she really needed to speak with him. She didn't know his number to call him and she didn't want to ask Kurt to ask Finn for it. She did tell them to tell him about the funeral details like he had asked, though, so she had been hoping he would be here.

"H—"

"Can we talk for a minute," Rachel asked, cutting off what she presumed would be a greeting or condolences from him.

"Yeah, sure," he replied, looking a little confused.

"I didn't want you to hear this from someone else," Rachel said as she led them to a quieter corner of the room.

"Did something happen to Beth?" Puck quickly asked.

"No, nothing like that," Rachel replied. "You asked me at the hospital what was going to happen to Beth."

Puck stared at her. "And you know now?"

"Shelby wished for me to raise her in the event of her death," Rachel stated.

"So—does that mean you're going to?" Puck asked.

"I have decided to try," Rachel replied. "A judge must grant the request, though, so I don't know if it will actually happen, but I want to."

Puck nodded. "That's good."

"You're okay with it?" Rachel asked.

"I'm just happy it's not a stranger, you know?" Puck said.

"I don't actually know what's going to happen, though," Rachel stressed. "I don't know if a judge will give Beth to a nineteen year old, and legally I'm not related to her. I am Leroy and Hiram Berry's child. Her lawyer, Mr. Wyatt, said he has a letter from her declaring her wishes, so hopefully that is taken into consideration."

"At least you're trying," Puck said, shrugging.

"Have you talked to Quinn at all?" Rachel asked.

"A little," he replied. "She hasn't really said anything."

"Considering what happened senior year, I'm a little surprised she isn't trying to file to be Beth's guardian," Rachel remarked.

"I think she likes to forget it all," Puck said. "She hasn't mentioned Beth since that happened."

"Oh," Rachel replied.

"I'd try," Puck stated. "If I was older, you know?" He shook his head. "My life is shit, though, and I'd never be able to do it now. Plus, what judge would give her to someone that gave her up? I don't deserve her."

"Don't be so hard on yourself," Rachel said, putting her hand on his bicep. "You and Quinn did what was best for her; you gave her to someone that loved her and could take care of her."

"Didn't do much good," Puck replied.

"That was an unforeseen event," Rachel said.

"Yeah," Puck said softly.

"I need to go check on something, but we'll talk again later, okay?" Rachel said, glancing across the room.

Puck nodded. "I'll probably duck out early, but I'll make sure I get you my number."

"Okay," Rachel said, removing her hand from Puck's arm.

Alexander Wyatt had just walked through the door and Rachel wanted to see if anything had changed since they last spoke. She looked over her shoulder at Kurt, who was watching her closely. She still hadn't told her best friend about calling the lawyer two days ago. Part of her was afraid Kurt would tell her she was making the wrong decision or that he no longer wished to be roommates if Beth were to come with them. She needed to tell him sooner or later, though; he deserved to know since the decision wasn't only going to be changing Rachel's life, but also Kurt's. Rachel just hoped he didn't decide to move out of their apartment; she was going to need him if she did become Beth's guardian. She didn't know if she could do it alone.

* * *

She heard the footsteps coming, and before she looked or anyone said anything, she knew it would be Kurt. Sure enough, a few moments later he said, "There you are."

"I knew you would find me sooner or later," Rachel said, smiling to herself.

"I saw you sneak out," Kurt said, walking up beside her. "I thought you might have gone downstairs and then I checked the front of the building, and eventually realized this was out here."

"It's nice, isn't it," Rachel commented.

"So, what are you doing out here?" Kurt asked

Rachel sighed. "I was feeling overwhelmed."

"Well, I'm glad you walked out when you did," Kurt replied. "I'm not one for religious ceremonies, and people kept glancing out of the corner of their eyes at me as if they were wondering why I wasn't praying with them." Kurt cleared his throat. "So—what were you talking to the lawyer about?"

"I wanted to know if anything had changed since we discussed things this morning," Rachel replied.

"What sort of things?" Kurt asked, sitting down on the bench with her.

Rachel looked around for a moment; they were sitting in a small flower garden that was behind the funeral home. It was very calming, but she supposed that's why it was here. People could come out here and get away from all the stress and sadness for a moment. She could feel Kurt's eyes on her and she took a deep breath before turning to him to answer his question.

"I told him I would like to be Beth's guardian if I was deemed appropriate," Rachel replied. "I couldn't bear the thought of Beth going to complete strangers or worse. What if she never got adopted again and ended up in foster home after foster home? I know Shelby and I were not close; she didn't really want me as a daughter and it hurt, and what hurt the most was when she adopted Beth. She had just rejected me and then went and found herself a new daughter. That's not Beth's fault, though; she's just a little girl and she lost the only family she knows. I can't deny Shelby's final wish, and if that final wish is for me to take care of her daughter, I'll do it."

"Are you really ready to be a mother?" Kurt asked.

"No," Rachel honestly said. "I don't have a choice, though."

"You do," Kurt replied.

Rachel sighed and shook her head. "No, I don't."

"I'm not surprised," Kurt commented.

"Why are you not surprised?" Rachel asked.

"Because I know you, Rachel Berry," Kurt replied. "You have a big heart and family matters to you—even if that family didn't always act the way it should. I know how it hurt when she came into your life and then left like she did, but you're one of the most forgiving people I know, which is good since we probably wouldn't be friends if you hadn't forgive me for some of the less than nice things I have said and done in the past. My point is you and Shelby had a rocky relationship, but she was still your biological mother, and even though you share no genetics with her, you still think of Beth as your sister, so of course you want to take her."

"I think you've been living with me for too long," Rachel said, laughing lightly. "You're starting to ramble like I do."

Kurt huffed. "I'm not rambling. Okay, I am, but it's only because I don't always know what to say right now."

"I'm going to stay in Lima until everything is sorted out," Rachel said. "Hopefully it won't be more than a few weeks; Mr. Wyatt said that because of the circumstances, they're pushing to get a court date quickly so a decision can be made."

"What are you going to do about school?" Kurt asked.

"I have contacted NYADA to let them know I am taking an extended leave," Rachel replied. "They have given me an extension for the showcase; currently they have pushed it back a week, so hopefully I will be back in New York by then." Rachel looked at Kurt. "You know—I would understand if you want to find a different roommate. If the judge grants the request, Beth will be moving in, and that is a huge change, so I would understand."

"Is this your way of trying to get rid of me?" Kurt asked, nudging his shoulder into hers.

"No," Rachel replied. "You know I don't want you to go anywhere, but I'm saying I would understand why you would want to leave."

"Rachel, I'm not going anywhere," Kurt said, putting his chin on her shoulder. "I think you're going to need someone around to help you take care of a four year old."

"Good, because you're right—I am going to need all the help I can get," Rachel said, smiling at him. "I've never so much as babysat before, so this is going to be an entirely new experience for me."

"Any judge would be crazy to give Beth to us to raise," Kurt said with a laugh.

"Let's hope for a crazy judge then," Rachel replied.

* * *

Rachel had been lying in bed for several hours, but no matter how long she laid there, she couldn't seem to fall asleep. She didn't really understand it, either; it had been a very long day and she was tired—exhausted really—but her mind just wasn't cooperating. She was thinking too much and she suspected it was what was causing her sleeplessness. This had been the most stressful week of her life, though, and it was hard to just relax. She even tried listening to music, but it only seemed to make the problem worse; each song that came through her headphones seemed to remind of her something or someone.

She glanced at the clock; it was a little after one, which meant she needed to be up in under six hours at the absolute latest, though she would have preferred to be able to get up and use her elliptical, but that looked like it wasn't going to happen. They needed to be at the funeral home by ten; they were having a service in the morning followed by Shelby's burial. After that, Hiram and Leroy were throwing a memorial of sorts at the house. They thought it would be nice to end on a positive note—to remember the happier times and celebrate Shelby's life rather than focusing on her death.

Rachel sighed and threw her covers aside; she was tired of lying there and decided to head downstairs to watch some television. She hoped her father still had his copy of Simply Irresistible on DVD; it was one of Hiram's favorite movies, though Leroy hated it and usually tried to hide it, so he didn't have to watch it again. It never failed to put Rachel to sleep, though, and she was hoping Leroy hadn't managed to do away with the movie.

As she opened the door and walked toward the stairs, she noticed a light coming from downstairs. She wondered if one of her fathers had accidently left the kitchen light on, but then she heard Leroy's voice. She headed down the stairs, and as she turned at the bottom, she saw both Leroy and Hiram in the kitchen. She stood still for a moment, eavesdropping on their conversation, but when she realized they weren't discussing anything in particular, she decided to go into the kitchen.

"What are you doing up?" Leroy asked the moment he saw her.

Rachel sighed as she pulled out on of the stools and joined her fathers at the kitchen island. "I couldn't sleep."

"Us either," Hiram said, taking a drink of what smelled like coffee.

"I don't think that caffeine is going to help anything," Rachel said, smiling at her father.

"No, but it tastes so good," Hiram replied.

"Plus, it's decaf," Leroy added.

Rachel laughed lightly. "I thought I would come downstairs and watch Simply Irresistible—if Daddy hasn't managed to get rid of the movie yet."

"I haven't been able to find it for the past year," Hiram said with a sigh as he shot his husband a dirty look.

"I'm sorry to say it's long gone," Leroy said to Rachel. "Although, I'm not really sorry because that movie is terrible."

"Too bad," Rachel said, standing up to pour herself a cup of coffee. "It never failed to make me fall asleep."

"So why can't you sleep?" Leroy asked.

Rachel shrugged and put a little bit of sugar in her coffee. "Too much on my mind."

"Are you worried about Beth, thinking about Shelby, or is it just a general thing?" Hiram asked.

"All of the above," Rachel replied. "It's no secret that I always hoped one day Shelby and I could get to know each other and have more of a relationship, and I just keep thinking how that will never happen now. You always think you're going to have more time to do things, so you put them off, but then one day it's too late. You waited too long and you'll never have the chance."

"We all have those things we regret," Hiram said, put his hand over Rachel's. "When I was fifteen I snuck out of the house and took the car even though I was not old enough to drive. I ended up sideswiping a car on the street and put the car back in the garage, hoping no one would see what happened. Well, your aunt got blamed for it and I still feel guilty that I never told my mom the truth. I always planned to, but like you said—I always thought I would have more time."

Rachel stared into her coffee for a moment and then looked up so see both of her fathers watching her. Sighing, she looked down again and said, "I'm worried about what's going to happen next."

"Do you mean with Beth?" Leroy asked.

Rachel nodded and took a sip of her coffee.

"Are you worried a judge isn't going to grant the guardianship?" Hiram asked.

"I don't know if I'm more worried about that or if I'm more worried that he will grant it," Rachel admitted.

"We know it's a big responsibly, but we also have complete faith in you," Hiram replied. "You've always excelled at everything you have done and I don't believe this will be an exception. I was terrified when we found out we were going to have a daughter; as much as I wanted you, I had no experience with children, and I was afraid I was going to mess everything up. It was exciting, but I also think it was the most scared I've been in my life. I like to think I did okay, though, even if I did have no idea what I was doing for the first couple years."

Rachel smiled. "You did a wonderful job."

"And you will too," Hiram stated.

"Shelby chose you for a reason," Leroy said. "She obviously trusted you enough and believed you were capable of this. Just remember that."

"And also remember that we're only a two hour flight away," Hiram added. "You know we will be here for you and help in any way that we can; all you have to do is call and we'll be on the next flight to New York."

Rachel nodded, smiling, and set her coffee mug aside. "I think I'll go upstairs and try to sleep again."

"Is your mind a little clearer now?" Leroy asked.

"It is," Rachel said, hugging Leroy, and then turning to hug Hiram. "Thank you."

"What are fathers for?" Hiram said, hugging her back.

"I love you," Rachel said, kissing Hiram's cheek and then leaning up to kiss Leroy's.

"We love you too, baby girl," Leroy replied.

As she headed for her room she felt a little more confident; if she could even do half as good as her fathers had done raising her, she knew Beth would turn out just fine. All she could really do right now, though, was wait and hope the judge would see that and allow her the opportunity to be Beth's guardian.


	4. The Point of No Return

**Devin Jaste: She is not; Rachel and Kurt are the only two at the apartment. Santana really won't be in this story much, though she will eventually make an appearance.**

**icewaterdrive: It will be interesting…Rachel and Kurt's influence with Puck and Quinn's genetics…**

* * *

**Chapter 4 – The Point of No Return**

As Rachel walked up the stairs to her apartment, she had a bag over each shoulder, a suitcase in one hand, and held Beth's hand with the other. She knew the girl was perfectly capable of walking up stairs herself, but she was still afraid she would trip and fall and it would be her fault. Rachel definitely wasn't used to taking care of a child, so she was hyperaware of every little thing, worried that she was going to do something wrong.

She could see the door to the apartment now and wondered if Kurt was done making Beth's room. She didn't exactly know what he was doing, but she knew he was cordoning off another area. They both agreed that it would be better for her to have her own area, and she hoped it was done by now since it wasn't yet complete that morning. She would rather Beth not have to sleep on the couch for a few days, though; she wanted her to have some stability and normalcy, which meant she needed that room done.

"We're here," Rachel announced to Beth as she stopped in front of the door.

She looked down, but the little girl didn't say anything and didn't even look up at her. Rachel knew Beth had been this way since the accident, but it didn't make it any easier. She always looked so sad and Rachel just wanted to hug her and make it all better, but she knew it wasn't that simple. Rachel wasn't used to feeling so helpless—she was more about actively doing things to try to help the situation—but she was definitely feeling helpless now.

The judge had finally heard the case and granted her request for guardianship only three days prior. She would be lying if she said she wasn't slightly shocked by the decision, but she was happy about it. Because of her young age, she really thought the judge would deny it, but because no one else came forward, and Shelby had written a very compelling letter in the event of her death asking for Rachel to be the one to raise Beth, the judge placed Beth under her care. She could tell the woman was a little apprehensive about it, but the judge was assured that Rachel would be a suitable guardian; there was a lot of discussion about whether or not she was responsible, her financial situation, and if she would have support from other people. Hiram and Leroy had been there, and Rachel thought maybe that was one of the things that swayed the judge. Rachel was just thankful she did have such a good support system because she knew she was going to need it.

The door slid open in front of her and she looked up to find Kurt standing there with clothes that were much more raggedy than she had ever seen him in. Now she was really curious to know what he was doing to the apartment.

"I told you to call me when you got into the city," Kurt said, reaching out, and taking her suitcase and one of the bags, which he set just inside the apartment.

"My phone died while Daddy was driving me to the airport," Rachel replied. "I forgot to charge it when I went to bed."

"Do you have more bags?" Kurt asked.

"There are several more downstairs," Rachel said, nodding toward the steps.

The suitcase was hers, but everything was else was stuff for Beth; luckily she had been able to go to Shelby's apartment and boxed up most things for storage, while packing up certain things in case she was able to take Beth. She didn't know what all Beth would want, so she did her best to bring what she could.

"I'll get them," Kurt said, already heading for the stairs. "Don't peek!"

Rachel led Beth into the apartment, and she immediately noticed the new section of the loft. It was smaller than either of their bedrooms, but it took up a decent portion of what used to be part of the living room. She wanted to go over and look inside the curtain, but she did as Kurt asked and didn't peek.

"Well, Beth, this is your new home," Rachel said.

Beth still didn't say anything, but Rachel did let go of her hand when she started pulling away. She stood just inside the apartment as she watched Beth look around. She knew it was going to take her some time to get used to living in a new place, but she really hoped the little girl would come to think of it as home.

"What do you think?" Rachel asked. "As soon as Kurt comes back, you will be able to see your room."

She could already hear Kurt struggling to bring the rest of the things up the stairs. When it sounded as if something fell—probably on Kurt if his grumbling was any indication—she looked at Beth. She didn't want to leave her alone, but she thought it might be a good idea to go help Kurt. She had no idea if it was okay to leave a four year old alone for a minute or two, though, and realized she really needed to ask her dads what was acceptable and not acceptable. Or maybe she would do an internet search on the subject.

"I'll be right back, okay?" she said, and Beth gave her a slight nod. "Don't go anywhere."

She rushed out of the apartment and sprinted down the stairs, finding Kurt halfway up, trying to juggle three different suitcases and a bag. His face was slightly red from exertion and she couldn't help but laugh.

"How did they let you bring this many bags on a plane?" Kurt asked.

"I'm sure they were quite happy to let me bring this many considering how much they charged me," Rachel said, taking the bag from around Kurt's neck, and grabbing one of the suitcases. "My question is why you didn't make two trips up the stairs."

"Just go," Kurt said, rolling his eyes.

Rachel laughed and headed up the stairs; when she walked into the apartment, she immediately looked for Beth. The girl was standing exactly where she had been when Rachel left; Rachel was happy to see that she at least listened.

"Ready to see the room?" Kurt asked the moment he set the bags on the floor.

"Would you like to see your room, Beth?" Rachel asked, walking over to her.

The girl didn't answer, but followed them nonetheless. Kurt quickly walked ahead and held a curtain in each hand; Rachel couldn't remember seeing him this excited in a long time.

"Ta-dah," Kurt said, opening the curtains, and revealing the room.

Rachel gasped when she saw it. "Kurt! Where did you get all of this stuff?"

"Well, the dresser, nightstand, and bedframe belonged to Adam, which he was kind enough to give me, and I repainted them since they were a boring white color," Kurt said. "The mattress and chair are both new, and I found the little vanity at that antique place we've been to a couple times; it's been there forever, so I bargained with her."

"Kurt, this is amazing," Rachel said, smiling. "What do you think, Beth?"

The little girl had been standing back, looking around the room, but she still hadn't moved from the entryway. Rachel sighed and looked at Kurt; she didn't know how to get Beth to start talking; she hoped she just needed time, though. She had been through more than any four year old should have to go through, and Rachel couldn't blame her for being a little withdrawn.

"Well, we'll leave and let you look around," Rachel said, grabbing Kurt's arm. "How does that sound?"

They headed for the living room, and Rachel hoped Beth would at least look around her new room if they were not in there with her.

"She's still not talking, huh?" Kurt said, looking over his shoulder.

Rachel shook her head. "I have no idea what to do, either." She sighed, but then looked at Kurt and gave him a smile. "You did an amazing job on the room. In time, I'm sure she will love it."

"You'll have to also thank your dads," Kurt remarked. "They mailed me a check with instructions to give Beth a nice room. I was also lucky enough that Adam gave me everything; I offered to pay him, but he knew what happened and wanted to do something."

"Did he already go back to England?" Rachel asked.

"He leaves Monday," Kurt answered. "He has been sleeping on his floor for a couple of days because he knew I wanted to repaint everything and have it done for when you guys came."

"Will you thank him for me?" Rachel asked. "And also tell him I said goodbye if I don't see him."

She was going to miss him; he and Kurt dated for a while, but when that didn't work out, they became friends. Rachel wasn't that close with him, but he did come to the apartment some, and she always liked him.

"Seriously, Kurt, thank you," Rachel said, wrapping her arms around him.

"You're welcome, sweetie," Kurt said, hugging her back

* * *

Rachel awoke to the sound of pots banging and it took her a moment to realize she was in her room in New York. After being in Lima for a little over a month, she had gotten used to sleeping there again. She rubbed her eyes and looking over her shoulder at the clock to see that it was nearly seven; she had only meant to take a short nap, but apparently her short nap turned into three hours. She had been pretty exhausted from the trip, though, and Kurt had insisted she lie down while he watched Beth.

She sat up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed, and stretched. Her muscles were a little sore from lifting so much luggage, and she was starting to wish she had listened to her fathers. They had offered to mail all the contents of the luggage, but Rachel was afraid Beth would want something and it wouldn't immediately be there. So, Rachel figured she would lug most of it herself. There were still a few boxes on their way—mostly clothes and stuffed animals—that she couldn't fit in the other bags.

Stretching one last time, she finally got to her feet. She could tell by the aroma in the house as well as the noise that Kurt was fixing something for dinner. Usually they just ordered takeout, but she guessed since it was Beth's first night in the apartment, he wanted to cook dinner for her. When she walked through the curtain, he was in the kitchen while Beth sat at the table, so she wandered over to them.

"What are you making?" Rachel asked, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

"Oh, you're up," Kurt said, looking over his shoulder before looking back at whatever he was stirring. "Salad, spaghetti, and garlic bread."

"It smells wonderful," Rachel said as she joined him by the stove.

"Kids like spaghetti, right?" Kurt whispered. "I tried to ask her what she liked, but she shrugged every time. I thought about macaroni and cheese, but I thought this would be a little more appetizing for the rest of us."

"She hasn't been eating very much anyway," Rachel informed him.

She turned to see what Beth was doing; there were several markers out on the table and she had a coloring book in front of her. When Rachel walked to the table, the little girl glanced up, and then went back to filling in the picture. Rachel didn't know where the coloring book came from—she didn't think it was in the things she brought—but she assumed Kurt must have gotten it. She did notice several toys in the room, so he had clearly been shopping for more than just furniture.

"That's very pretty," Rachel commented, looking down at whatever princess Beth was coloring the dress of.

When Beth didn't say anything, Rachel looked over her shoulder at Kurt, was looking at her. They both shrugged at each other and Rachel sat down at the table, sitting across from Beth.

"Do you need any help?" Rachel asked.

"You could set the table," Kurt said, nodding to the stack of dishes on the counter.

Rachel stood, grabbing the stack, and started placing them on the table. She put Beth's plate and silverware next to her since she was taking up the area in front of her, and Rachel didn't want to ask her to put it away. She figured it was good that Beth was coloring; at least she wasn't just sitting there in silence.

"Everything should just about be ready," Kurt said when the oven beeped. "Try this and tell me what you think."

Rachel tasted a bit of the sauce on the spoon he was holding up. "Perfect."

Kurt quickly turned, grabbed an oven mitt, and took the garlic bread out the oven. She then watched as he grabbed the boiling pot, pouring the contents into a strainer, and turned to pull his sauce off. She was glad he was such a good cook; if she had tried making dinner, the bread would be burned, the noodles would be overcooked, and she would probably have half the sauce on her clothes. She came from a family that was pretty dedicated to their takeout, so neither of her fathers had really ever taught her to cook.

She grabbed the salad from the counter and put it in the middle of the table while Kurt set everything else on it. Rachel walked to the refrigerator, grabbed two bottles of water, and then looked at Beth.

"Beth, what would you like to drink?" she asked. "Is water okay?"

Beth nodded, so Rachel grabbed another bottle and walked to the table, sitting down next to Kurt. The two adults looked at each other for a moment and then Rachel stood, grabbing the pasta scoop, and leaning over to put food on Beth's plate. When she was done with Beth's plate, she went ahead and put some on hers and Kurt's as well.

"How was the flight?" Kurt asked, glancing at Beth more than Rachel. "Did you like flying? Was it the first time you'd been in an airplane?"

"No," Beth actually answered.

Kurt looked a little surprised that she actually spoke. "No, you didn't like flying or no, you'd never flown before?"

Beth didn't answer further; Kurt let out a little sigh and looked at Rachel, who just shrugged. She had no idea how to get Beth to talk; even her fathers hadn't been very successful. She did notice that Beth had taken a few bites of food, so she was already considering this dinner a victory. She knew this was going to be a big adjustment for them all, so she was fairly content with baby steps at this point.

"What do you have planned for tomorrow?" Kurt asked, looking at Rachel.

Rachel sighed. "I need to go talk to my instructors and let them know I'm back."

She was incredibly lucky they were all understanding; they had all agreed to let her make up her work. If they hadn't, she would have ended up failing the semester, and would've had to repeat all her classes, putting her behind. She had already made up most of her non-performance work while she was in Lima, so now she just needed to make up the rest and prepare for her showcase.

"How's the spaghetti?" Kurt asked Beth after she finished chewing another bite. "Is it good?"

Beth nodded. "But Mommy always put hotdogs in it."

Rachel and Kurt both froze; Rachel could tell by the look on the little girl's face that she just realized what she said. A moment later, Beth dropped her fork and began crying.

"Oh dear," Kurt said.

"Beth, sweetie," Rachel said, jumping up, and running around the table to kneel next to her. "It's okay."

Rachel wrapped her arms around Beth, hoping to comfort her. She didn't really know what to do but to hug her and try to tell her everything was going to be okay. Then she remembered when she was little. She always liked it when her fathers sang to her when she was upset—it never failed to calm her down-so she began humming softly as the little girl cried in her arms.

* * *

Rachel quietly crept through the room, pausing at the curtain to look back. She took a deep breath and slowly released it; she was happy Beth was finally asleep even if it took her a long time to get there. She watched her for a few minutes, enjoying how peaceful she looked, and then finally walked through the curtain. Kurt was at the kitchen table and she walked over to join him.

"I'm making coffee," Kurt said the moment she sat down.

"Coffee sounds good," Rachel said, knowing she was probably going to be up half the night, so some caffeine would help with staying awake.

"Did you finally get her to sleep?" Kurt asked, nodding towards Beth's room.

Rachel nodded. "I didn't think she was ever going to stop crying. I feel so horrible for her, but I don't know what to do. I already feel like this is a huge mistake and the judge should have given her to someone more qualified for this."

"It's not a job, Rachel, and you're doing the best you can," Kurt remarked. "Just consider yourself a new parent; no one knows what they're doing in the beginning. They usually have newborns, though, so this is just a little more complicated, but we will both get through it. It's just going to take time for us to learn."

"I know," Rachel said, sighing. "It's just frustrating feeling so helpless. I want to fix everything, but I know it's not that simple."

"You're right," Kurt replied. "It's not that simple, but you're trying, which is more than most people are doing."

"I suppose," Rachel whispered.

Kurt stood and walked to the cabinet, where he grabbed two mugs, and began pouring the coffee into them. He put a few teaspoons of sugar in his, and then walked back with the mugs, setting one in front of Rachel. She wrapped her hands around it and breathed in the scent. Ever since she was little, she loved the smell of coffee; it always made her think of her fathers.

"Are you hungry?" Kurt asked, walking back to another cabinet, and opening it. "We didn't really get to have dinner."

"Not really," Rachel replied.

She knew she should be hungry—she hadn't eaten much today—but she didn't have much of an appetite. It had been that was since she opened her door to find the police standing on the other side. While she was in Lima, she really only ate when her fathers called her down to dinner, usually skipping breakfast and lunch unless one of her dads were home.

"Are you sure?" Kurt asked.

"I'm sure," she replied.

Kurt grabbed the stepstool and stood on it so he could see the top shelf, where he kept his stash of junk food. He said he put it up so high to make him think twice about getting into it, but Rachel was convinced he did it because she could barely reach it even while she was standing on the stool.

"I need to go shopping tomorrow," Rachel said, thinking about how she would need to get food that was more appropriate for a four year old.

"I can go if you would like," Kurt offered.

"No, I'll go," Rachel said, shaking her head. "I think I'll take Beth; hopefully she will let me know what she likes."

"And if she doesn't?" Kurt asked.

"Well, I guess I will have to buy a little of everything," Rachel responded.

"Aren't you glad we have the cabinets now?" Kurt said, raising his eyebrow at her.

She laughed lightly before taking a sip of her coffee. "Yes, I am."

They actually hadn't had the cabinets long; they were a gift from Kurt's dad. Every time he came to visit, Kurt would cook and complain the whole time about lack of counter and cabinet space. At the time she didn't really think they needed them, but with Beth here now, she was glad to have them.

"Do you think we should move?" Kurt abruptly asked.

Rachel frowned. "Why?"

"I don't know," Kurt said, looking around. "I was thinking and I thought maybe you would want an apartment that's in a slightly better neighborhood and, you know—has actual walls."

"Is this your way of saying you want to move?" Rachel asked.

"You know I love this apartment, Rach, but what I'm saying is if you want to move because of Beth, we can do that," Kurt explained.

"I'm perfectly content right here," Rachel replied.

"Okay, but the offer still stands if you change your mind," Kurt said.

"I appreciate it, Kurt," Rachel said, looking toward Beth's room, and sighing. "Do you think I should set up an appointment with a child psychologist?"

"That's really up to you," Kurt said with a slight shrug. "I think I would wait a week or two, though; if things don't improve, I would say absolutely."

She looked at the clock and saw this it was nearly midnight; despite the fact that she was still drinking coffee, she was starting to feel incredibly tired. "I think I'm going to go to bed."

"I thought you were going to stay up," Kurt commented.

Rachel shrugged. "I've changed my mind; tomorrow is going to be a very long day, so I should get a decent night's rest."

"What all do you have to do?" Kurt asked.

"Well, I need to go grocery shopping, stop by NYADA, rehearse some for the showcase, and I need to find a job," Rachel replied.

"I thought your dads were going to pay for everything," Kurt commented.

"They're still going to help, but one of the stipulations of getting Beth was that I needed to find a job, which I promised to do," Rachel replied.

"Can they revoke guardianship if you don't?" Kurt asked.

"I honestly don't know, but I'm not going to risk finding out," Rachel replied as she stood up.

She really didn't know if Beth could be taken away or not, but she hoped not. She was sure the judge or lawyer had probably told her at some point, but she was honestly in a bit of a daze the whole time and didn't remember. Most of what she remembered was answering questions. She couldn't blame them for asking so many questions, though; they obviously only wanted what was best for Beth, so she needed to prove that she was what was best. Thankfully she had her fathers and Kurt to help her through it; they were all there for emotional support and Kurt had helped by showing a social worker around the apartment when they wanted to see where Beth would be living.

"We won't," Kurt stated. "Beth isn't going anywhere; we'll both make sure of that."

"You wouldn't know anywhere that's hiring, would you?" Rachel asked.

"No, but I can ask around," Kurt replied.

"Thank you," Rachel said, taking the few steps to Kurt, and giving him a hug. "For dinner and giving Beth an amazing room—for everything."

"No need to thank me," Kurt softly said into her ear as he hugged her back.

Rachel let go of him and gave him a sad smile. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Rachel," he said.

"Goodnight," Rachel said, reaching out and giving his hand a friendly squeeze.

She covered a yawn as she turned to head to Beth's room, wanting to check on the little girl before going to bed herself. When she poked her head through the curtain, the little girl was curled up in her bed. She looked peaceful and Rachel hoped it stayed that way. She'd had nightmares the past two nights in Lima, and Rachel hated seeing her so upset. She hoped tonight would be different, but if it wasn't, Rachel was just across the loft and would come running if she needed her.

* * *

**Reviews are always appreciated.**


	5. It's a Day in the Life

**The Twilight Topaz: I know exactly when Quinn will come around, but I won't say which chapter or it won't be a surprise.**

**lnkmstr10: Yeah, those stories bug me, so I try to avoid doing that.**

**Jules-Day: Thank you for the wonderful comment. **

* * *

**Chapter 5 – It's a Day in the Life**

Rachel grabbed her bottle of water and sat down on the cold, wood floor; she was exhausted from dancing and took a long drink of water. Even though the room was quiet, she was having trouble concentrating, and kept having to do the same moves over and over, trying to get them perfect. She would've already been over with the showcase, but she was allowed to postpone it; now, though, she only had four days to prepare, which was far less time than she would like. The singing part of the showcase would be no problem, but she was also expected to show off her dancing, which she was a little less naturally skilled at. It was something all NYADA students had to do at the end of their sophomore year, though, so there was no getting out of it.

"Hey."

Rachel looked up at the sound of the voice. "Hello, Brody."

"I, uh—I heard what happened with your mom," he said, pushing off from the doorframe, and walking into the room.

Rachel frowned. "How did you hear about it?"

"Kurt," Brody replied. "I noticed I hadn't seen you around in a while and asked him one day."

"I've been at home for the past five weeks," Rachel explained.

"Five weeks?" Brody asked. "I mean, I get that she died, but why would you leave for five weeks?"

Kurt clearly hadn't told Brody about Beth, which she was slightly grateful for. She would rather everyone not know every detail of her life, especially Brody. They had dated for a while her freshman year; it was embarrassing to think now how much she tried to change for him, so she didn't really like thinking about their time together. He was the first guy that really complimented her much, though, and she nearly lost herself trying to impress him.

"Well, I'm back now," Rachel said, ignoring his question.

Brody nodded. "When's your showcase?"

"Wednesday," Rachel answered. "I'm lucky that they were so understanding."

"I'm actually surprised," Brody remarked. "This school isn't known for being understanding or accommodating."

"I take it you're graduating this weekend," Rachel said, hoping to steer the conversation in a different direction.

Brody smiled. "Yeah, I'm finally getting out of here. I'm staying in New York, though."

"That's nice," Rachel said, noticing her phone lighting up. "Excuse me."

She grabbed the phone quickly as soon as she saw it was Kurt, afraid something might have happened to Beth. She didn't like leaving her in the apartment, but she knew it was better than bringing her there. At least she had stuff to do at the apartment, and Kurt was there to look after her, whereas Rachel wouldn't be able to pay much attention to her while she was rehearsing.

"Hello," Rachel said as she put the phone to her ear. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything is fine," Kurt immediately answered. "I was just calling to ask if you're going to be done anytime soon since Beth and I are downstairs, and we wanted to know if you would like to get lunch."

Rachel glanced at Brody; she knew he would probably stick around for a while, so she wouldn't get much rehearsing done anyway. "Yes, I can be right down."

"See you in a minute," Kurt said before hanging up.

"That was Kurt," Rachel explained. "We're going to get lunch."

"Sounds like fun," Brody said.

Rachel nodded as she grabbed her stuff. "If I don't see you before Saturday, congratulations on graduating, and good luck with whatever you do."

"Thanks," Brody said, smiling.

She gave him a smile as she ducked out of the room and hurried down the stairs. She found Kurt and Beth waiting near the entrance to the building and smiled at Beth as she walked over.

"Perfect timing," she said, glancing at Kurt.

"Oh?" Kurt said, raising his eyebrow.

"Brody," Rachel said.

Kurt nodded. "What did he want?"

"Nothing important," Rachel said with a shrug. "How was your guys' day? Have you had fun together?"

"I like to think so," Kurt said when Beth didn't answer. "We did some finger painting, then we colored, and then we watched Finding Nemo."

Rachel couldn't help but laugh. "I'm sorry I missed it."

"So are we," Kurt said, holding the door open for her and Beth. "How'd rehearsing go?"

"Terrible," Rachel said with a sigh. "I feel so out of practice and nothing seems to be working correctly." She sighed again. "Hopefully tomorrow will be better."

"Did you check out that opening?" Kurt asked.

"I did, but they'd already hired someone yesterday," Rachel replied.

"So, not a very good day for you, is it?" Kurt asked.

"It's getting better," Rachel said, smiling at him, and then looking down at Beth, who was looking up at them.

"So, are you done or are you going back to the studio after lunch?" Kurt asked.

"I think I'll call it a day," Rachel replied. "I don't want to miss out on all the fun with you two."

* * *

Rachel and Kurt were standing back a little bit, watching Beth watch the ducks. She still wasn't really talking to either one of them, but at least she was smiling occasionally as she watched the animals. It was actually the first time Rachel had seen her look happy at all. She was glad they came to the park after getting lunch, and she was already planning to do it often. Now if they could just get her talking, maybe they could figure out other things she liked.

For the past couple days they had been guessing with everything. They didn't know what she liked to watch, what she liked to play with, or even what food she liked to eat. Rachel had taken her grocery shopping, hoping to figure out the latter, but every time she asked Beth anything, she would just shrug. Rachel ended up buying a little of everything, but Beth still wasn't eating much, so she still had no idea what she liked. So far they currently knew she liked to color and she apparently liked watching ducks.

"What's your plan for tomorrow?" Kurt asked.

Rachel sighed. "I'm going to get up early, go to the studio, and try to be back before noon," Rachel said. "Is that alright? I'm sorry I'm dumping Beth on you like this. If you want, I can take her with me. She'll probably be bored, but I can bring along her coloring books, so she should be okay for a while."

"Rachel, it's fine," Kurt replied. "I know that you want to do well with this showcase; I understand."

Rachel sighed. "I promise as soon as it's over, you'll have your life back."

Kurt laughed. "Sweetie, you know I never really had a life. It's been months since I last had a date."

"Maybe you should go get one," Rachel said, smiling at him

"If only it were that simple," he said with a wistful sigh.

"I still say you should sign up on a dating website," Rachel commented. "You keep complaining about never having a date, but you don't actually do anything about it. Any guy would be lucky to have you; you're smart, you're sweet, you're funny, you have impeccable taste in clothes—you just need to put yourself out there."

"Are you forgetting about the disasters that have been my past three relationships?" Kurt asked.

"I wouldn't exactly classify your relationship with Adam as a disaster," Rachel replied.

"Fine, but Blaine broke my heart when he cheated on me, and Bryan was just—"

"A little—less than sane," Rachel finished for him.

"Exactly," Kurt said.

"Which is why you need to get back out there," Rachel replied.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "I could say the same thing about you. "You've been in exactly two relationships in your life—Finn and Brody. If you can even count Brody."

"I also dated Jesse," Rachel said, crossing her arms over her chest.

"And he was only dating you to spy on us," Kurt reminded her.

Rachel huffed. "I have too much to worry about right now; I don't need to think about dating."

"Excuses, excuses," Kurt said, smiling.

"I just—I want someone that's going to accept me for me," Rachel said, furrowing her brows. "Finn always wanted me to change because I wasn't popular enough for him and Brody was just—he always wanted me to be sexier. Everyone wants to change me, and I let them because I want someone to love me. It isn't until it's over that I realize what's happened to me. I don't want to do that again."

"You'll find someone that realizes just how amazing Rachel Berry is," Kurt said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

"I don't know; it took you almost a year to realize how amazing I am," Rachel joked.

"How many times are you going to bring this up?" Kurt said, smiling at her.

Rachel shrugged. "I simply like to remind you every now and then how far we've come."

"Yes, we have a child now," Kurt joked, nodding toward Beth.

"Yeah," Rachel whispered, looking at her.

"Are you okay?" Kurt asked.

Rachel nodded. "I'm fine. Maybe feeling a little overwhelmed by everything at the moment. I feel like I have so much on my shoulders right now." She shook her head. "Don't worry about me, though; once I get done with this showcase and obtain a job, things should settle down a little. I just have to make it through the next few days. I _will_ make it through the next few days"

"I know you will," Kurt replied. "You always do."

Rachel gave him a smile and then walked toward Beth as she asked, "Are you ready to go? I was thinking that maybe we could get some ice cream before we go home. What do you think? Would you like some ice cream?"

Beth nodded and Rachel reached her hand out for Beth to grab, so she could jump down from the step she was on. Kurt walked on to the other side, taking Beth's other hand, and lifted her off the ground, swinging her for a moment before putting her feet back on the ground. Beth giggled—the first time Rachel had heard such a thing come from her mouth—and the two adults looked at each other. Rachel gave him a nod, and together they lifted her again, swinging her between them.

"Are we going to Phil's?" Kurt asked.

"Where else?" Rachel asked.

Phil was their favorite ice cream vendor; he even carried vegan friendly ice cream for Rachel now. His cart was close to NYADA, so they often stopped by after classes on Fridays before taking a walk around the park. It was just a little thing they did; sometimes their lives would be so hectic and they didn't see each other much, so it was their way of making sure they had the chance to catch up with each other.

It was a short walk to get ice cream; they both always got the same thing—chocolate for Kurt and vanilla for Rachel—so he was already scooping out their ice cream by the time they stopped by the cart. Kurt grabbed his while Phil was still putting the rest of Rachel's into a cup.

"And what for the little girl?" he asked.

"What type of ice cream do you want, Beth?" Rachel asked.

"You have to tell us or we won't know what to get," Kurt added when she didn't say anything.

"Pink," Beth said.

"I think she wants strawberry," Rachel said.

"Coming up," Phil said.

He put two scoops into a cup and handed it to Beth, who said, "Thank you."

Kurt and Rachel smiled at each other; Rachel felt like any little bit they got her to talk was a victory, and she knew Kurt felt the same way.

"Do you like it?" Rachel asked Beth as Kurt paid for them.

Beth didn't say anything but nodded vigorously.

"What do you think?" Kurt asked. "Should we go to the toy store next?"

"Yeah," Beth answered.

"What?" Kurt asked upon seeing the look on Rachel's face. "I still have money left over from Leroy and Hiram; I offered to send it back, but they told me to buy her toys."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "They are going to spoil her, aren't they?"

"Probably," Kurt said, laughing.

"Okay," Rachel sighed, smiling, "let's go to the toy store."

* * *

"I think I need a nap," Rachel said after yawning for a third time in the past few minutes.

"I think we could all use one," Kurt said as they neared their apartment building.

They had been gone far longer than Rachel thought they would, but Beth had been so happy at the park that they stayed there for longer than she'd anticipated, and then they spent far too much time at the toy store. At least Beth seemed to enjoy the day, which made everything worth it. She really did need a nap, though, and couldn't wait to get into the apartment to take one. They were almost up the steps, but as soon as Rachel got to their landing, she stopped, causing Kurt to bump into her.

"Uh, Rachel—"

"Noah!" Rachel said, seeing him sitting with his back against the wall. "What on earth are you doing here?"

Rachel watched as he jumped and looked at her, clearly having been asleep. "Hey—you're here."

"Yes, we are, which makes sense because we live here," Rachel remarked. "The question is what you are doing here."

"Oh, I—uh—" Puck scratched his head.

"Kurt, can you take Beth inside, please?" Rachel asked, cutting off anything else Puck was going to say.

Kurt nodded and she watched as the two walked into the apartment, sliding the door shut behind them. She then looked as Puck, expecting him to explain, but he still looked a little sheepish. Sighing, she walked over to him and sat down, leaning her back against the wall as well.

"What are you doing here, Noah," Rachel said, looking at him.

Puck shrugged. "I had a couple days off from work and thought I would—you know—come here."

"We are not friends, nor have we ever been friends," Rachel stated. "And as far as I know, you've never been particularly friendly with Kurt, either. So, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see Beth, okay?" Puck said, clenching his jaw. "I know I'm not her dad, but I needed to see that she was doing okay. I know I shoulda called, but I wanted to see her, and didn't want you to have the chance to say no."

"Do you really think I would keep you from her if you really wanted to see her?" Rachel asked.

"I dunno," Puck replied, looking away.

"I am perfectly fine with you having a relationship with her," Rachel said. "That being said, I think it would be best if we say you are just a friend of ours. I don't know what Shelby told her about you, but she's been through enough change, and I don't want to confuse her life even more than it already has been."

Puck nodded. "That's cool."

"Okay," Rachel said, standing up. "We may go inside now."

Puck grinned as he stood up; he was clearly excited to see Beth. She didn't know why he thought she would keep him away from his daughter, though. They weren't friends, but she thought he should know her better than that.

When they walked in, Beth was sitting at the table, already set up with her coloring book, and Kurt was in the kitchen, looking through the cabinets. He glanced up when Rachel slid the door shut and asked, "Everything okay?"

"Everything's fine," Rachel replied. "Noah will be staying with us for—how long?"

"I planned on leaving Wednesday," Puck replied.

"How did you know where we live?" Kurt asked.

"Finn gave me your address," Puck said, shrugging.

Rachel frowned. "How did Finn know our address?"

"Burt, I think," Puck answered.

"I really need to do some grocery shopping," Kurt said, sighing as he closed the cabinet. "Is everyone okay with pizza?"

"Whatever's fine," Puck answered. "I ain't picky."

"What would you like on your pizza, Beth?" Rachel asked.

"You have to let us know," Kurt said, walking up next to her, and leaning down with his elbows on the table. "Otherwise we might order anchovy for you."

Beth stopped coloring for a moment and answered, "Cheese."

"Cheese pizza it is," Kurt said, standing up, and looking at Rachel. "I assume you want your usual."

"Of course," Rachel replied.

"Okay, Rachel's usual, a personal cheese for Beth," Kurt rattled off. "Puck?"

"I'll eat anything," Puck replied. "So, whatever you're getting."

"Hawaiian for me and Puck," Kurt finished. "I'll call it in."

Puck looked at Beth for a moment and then looked over his shoulder, looking around. "Your place is cool; mine's a total dump."

"I doubt it's that bad," Rachel replied.

"It is," Puck said, shaking his head. "It's a complete dump. It has roaches and shi—" he glanced at Beth, "stuff, but I didn't wanna live at home anymore, and it's all I could afford."

"Where are you working?" Rachel wondered.

"Burt's garage with Finn," Puck replied. "It's not what I wanna be doing for the rest of my life, but it's okay for now."

"Pizzas are ordered," Kurt said, walking back toward them. "They said it should be in in thirty minutes."

"Did you drive here?" Rachel asked.

"Bus," Puck replied. "Speaking of which, could I use your shower? The bus ride was, like, eighteen hours, and I probably smell."

"There's one through my room," Rachel said, pointing him in the right direction. "There's towels in the cabinet next to the window."

He nodded as he stood up. "Thanks."

Kurt watched as he walked into Rachel's room and then immediately looked at her. "Did he tell you why he's here?"

"The obvious," Rachel said, trying to discreetly nod toward Beth. "He was concerned and wanted to visit."

"That's a first," Kurt said, scoffing. "I've never known Puck to be concerned with anything or anyone."

"Kurt," Rachel said warningly.

Kurt sighed. "Sorry."

"I'm not exactly happy that he just stopped by without calling, but he's here now, and I'm not just going to kick him out," Rachel said. "He spent the past day on a bus, so he clearly really wanted to come."

"I just wish I had known he was coming," Kurt replied.

"Me too, but it's too late for that," Rachel remarked. "He's our guest now, so let's make him feel welcome."

"Fine," Kurt said, sighing.

* * *

Rachel slowly opened her eyes and looked at the clock to see that it was nearly five in the morning. She groaned at having woken up and rolled into her stomach, burying her face in her pillow. She hated waking up earlier than she needed to; it usually meant she would lie there until her alarm went off, willing herself to fall back asleep, but never actually falling asleep. She hadn't planned on getting up until six, so she was wasting a whole hour of sleep.

Sighing, she removed her face from the pillow and sat up. She rubbed her eyes and sat there for a moment, trying get out of her little daze that always came when she first woke up. After a few moments, she stood and walked to the bathroom; once she was done using the facilities, she trudged into the living room. She stopped just outside the curtain, though. The light was on in the kitchen and she was sure she turned it off before going to bed. She immediately looked at the couch to find that Puck was no longer sleeping in it; the covers were messy, though, so he'd obviously slept for a while.

She instinctively went to Beth's room, and sure enough, he was standing just inside the curtain. He looked over his shoulder when she pulled the curtain aside and came out of the room, glancing back at Beth for a second before shutting the curtain.

"Is everything okay?" Rachel whispered. "Could you not sleep that well?"

"It was fine," Puck said, running his hand over his head. "I just heard her, so I got up to make sure she was okay, but then I sort of stood there watching her. Not in a creepy way, but—"

"You want to watch your daughter sleep," Rachel said.

"Yeah," Puck replied. "I never got to, you know?"

Rachel nodded. "Would you like some coffee?"

"I don't normally drink the crap, but I'm probably going to need it," Puck said.

Rachel walked to the coffeemaker, which was set to go at six, but she started it early. She walked to the cabinet and grabbed two mugs as Puck sat down at the table, rubbing his eyes. He did look incredibly tired, and she wondered if he had gotten any sleep. She could understand, though; she usually couldn't sleep very well in a place she didn't know and their couch wasn't very comfortable to begin with. It looked nice, which is why Kurt picked it out, but it wasn't very soft. She couldn't complain too much, though; it was better than the futon they previously had in the apartment.

"Do you have anything planned for today?" Rachel asked, turning around, and leaning back against the counter.

Puck shrugged. "Figured I'd hang around here."

"I have to go and rehearse for this showcase I have coming up on Wednesday, but I should be back before noon," Rachel said. "You know, in case you would like to do anything. I know you saw New York somewhat when we were here for Nationals, but I'm sure there was a lot you didn't get to see. Maybe you can see some of it while you are here. We can bring Beth, of course."

"Maybe," Puck said, looking towards Beth's room.

"Are you okay, Noah?" Rachel asked.

"Just tired," Puck said, shrugging.

"I don't just mean that," Rachel said.

"I dunno," Puck said, looking at her. "I guess."

"I know we've never been friends, but you can talk to me," Rachel insisted.

Puck sighed. "I knew I was always gonna end up a Lima Loser, but we've been outta school for two years and I'm still doing nothing. I barely even passed high school, so my grades sucked, and no college wants me. I don't want to spend the rest of my life working at Burt's shop. Seeing you two here just makes me realize what a loser I am. You two are living in New York and I'm living in some shitty apartment in Lima."

"You're only twenty, Noah," Rachel said, turning around to fill their mugs full of coffee. "Nothing says you'll be in Lima for the rest of your life; you still have plenty of time to turn things around. I know you've done some dumb things in your life, but _you're_ not dumb. You had that pool cleaning business while you were still in high school. You're smart when it comes to business, and I think if you were going to pursue a field, it should be that. Have you tried applying to community colleges? I'm sure one would be happy to have you."

"I don't exactly have the money to go," Puck replied.

"Do you want cream or sugar?" Rachel asked.

"Nah," Puck replied.

"I know it seems like a hopeless situation right now, but it's not," Rachel said, setting the coffee down in front of his, and joining him at the table. "Things will get better; they usually do. Just don't give up."

"I don't even know why I'm telling you this," Puck said, shaking his head. "I mean, you just lost Shelby and now you're taking care of a kid, and I'm complaining about something stupid. Not to mention how much of an ass I was to you, so I don't even know why you're listening to me or letting me stay here."

"I'm listening to you and letting you stay here because I don't hold a grudge," Rachel replied. "Yes, you weren't very nice to me while we were in high school, but you were nicer to me than a lot of the other students. At least you didn't continue to throw slushies in my face after you joined show choir."

Truth be told, Puck was one of the people that were nicest to her. Not nice in the traditional sense, but at least he didn't openly ridicule her or call her names or threaten to tape her mouth shut. She was in the glee club with the same people for three years; she thought they would eventually come to accept her, but they never did. Despite dating one of the most popular guys in school, everyone else still saw her as an annoying diva that only cared about getting solos and winning. Kurt was the only person that really bothered to get to know her. Even Finn, who she dated off and on for those three years, still only seemed to see her that way most times. The more she tried to befriend them, the more it seemed to leave her open to ridicule. She tried to put it aside—high school was over two years ago, after all—but it was still one of her biggest sources of insecurity.

"I was still an ass," Puck said, shaking his head.

Rachel laughed lightly. "A little, yes, but I'm a very forgiving person and I believe in second chances. Sometimes third and fourth chances, but that isn't an invitation to continue any negative behavior toward me."

"I won't," Puck replied.

"Good," Rachel said, glancing at the clock on the microwave. "If you'll excuse me, I think I'm going to get an early start. If you hear Beth, though—"

"I'll go running," Puck said.

"Thank you," Rachel said, squeezing his shoulder as she walked by.

Rachel looked back over her shoulder as she walked to her bedroom. She was glad to see he had grown up since graduation, but it was just a shame he still didn't seem to believe in himself. Yes, he had made some mistakes—quite a few, actually—but she didn't like seeing anyone being so hard on themselves.

She sighed as she walked into her room and turned on the light. She knew she was going to have another long day ahead of her, but she was going to do her best to get home early. Beth had only been there for three days, but Rachel was already beginning to feel like she was missing a lot by being away during the morning, and she didn't like feeling that way. So, she was going to try to get back earlier even if it meant she had to get up earlier to do it.


	6. Surprise, Surprise

**I normally reply to a few of you individually, but honestly it would just be a lot of me saying 'thank you' because of all the kind words. So, I'll just say a big thank you to everyone; you guys are awesome with the reviews and they mean more than you know.**

* * *

**Chapter 6 – Surprise, Surprise**

Rachel was beaming at the sound of Kurt's enthusiastic clapping and Puck's wolf whistle. Their response was a little embarrassing and it had her blushing, but she was smiling nevertheless. The room wasn't nearly as full as it would have been if school was still in session, but most of her past instructors were there as well as ones she would have in the future. She was surprised that Brody was there, and even if they weren't really friends, she did appreciate the support. She made sure she thanked several people—namely the ones who allowed her to postpone this showcase—before joining Kurt, Puck, and Beth at the back of the room.

"I'm so proud of you!" Kurt said, wrapping his arms around her the moment she was within reach.

"Thank you, Kurt," Rachel said, hugging him tightly. "I couldn't have done this without your help."

"Dude's right," Puck said, clapping Kurt on the back. "You were awesome."

"Thank you, Noah," Rachel said smiling at him as Kurt released her.

"Did you enjoy it, Beth?" Rachel asked, looking down.

Beth nodded and said, "Yes."

Rachel smiled even wider if that was possible. "I'm glad."

"Well, I hate to run, but I need to get to work," Kurt said, kissing her cheek. "I should be home around ten."

"I'm sure I will be asleep by then," Rachel said, laughing.

This week had been exhausting; she was up every morning by five and would immediately get ready and head to NYADA. She was just happy the school was open at all hours of the day, but they usually left the rooms open, so students could come and rehearse at any time. Usually she would make it home before eleven, so she could have lunch with everyone, and then she would spend the rest of the day with them. It was just a relief that the showcase was finally over, so she could spend more time with Beth until she found employment.

"It's too bad we can't celebrate," Rachel said, pouting at the fact that Kurt had to leave.

"Who says we can't?" Puck asked.

"He's right," Kurt replied.

"We should totally go out and celebrate you kicking the showcase's a—butt," Puck said.

Kurt laughed. "Yes, you did kick its butt, so go out and have fun."

Kurt gently ruffled Beth's hair, causing her to scowl at him, and then turned to walk away. He waved to them over his shoulder and Rachel shook her head, laughing. While the little girl generally favored her mother more than her father with her blonde hair and hazel eyes, the look on Beth's face reminded her a lot of one she often saw on Puck's face.

"Well, if you would like to have a celebratory dinner, I'm all for it," Rachel said. "After I go home, shower, and change because I don't think this is very appropriate to go to a restaurant in."

Puck laughed. "No, but you look kinda hot like that."

Rachel rolled her eyes and pushed his shoulder. "Don't even start that, Noah Puckerman."

"C'mon, you know I didn't mean anything by it," Puck said, laughing again.

"Be that as it may—"

"Alright," Puck held up his hands in surrender, "I won't say anything about you being hot ever again."

"Thank you," Rachel replied.

"So, where do you wanna go?" Puck asked. "Because I don't know this city at all, so you should probably pick or I'll end up taking us to some craphole."

"Noah," Rachel said warningly.

"Craphole isn't a bad word," Puck stated.

Rachel rolled her eyes. "She starts kindergarten this year and I would rather if she didn't use such words at school. It'll make me look like a bad guardian."

"Can they—" Puck looked down and mumbled, "take her away?"

"I'm sure they can," Rachel whispered, sighing, not really wanting Beth to hear this conversation. "Which is why I'm not going to give them any reason to do that." Rachel cleared her throat. "And to answer your question, I know the perfect place."

Puck nodded and looked down at Beth, asking, "Are you ready to go?"

Beth nodded back and held out her hand; Puck looked surprised by it, but reached out, taking Beth's hand in his. He appeared as if he was trying to look unaffected by it, but she could tell a smile was tugging at his lips.

Rachel would actually be sad to see him go, and wished he could stay longer, but he was catching the bus late that night. She thought about asking if he wanted to stay longer, but she knew it was probably hard enough on him to take off the days he'd already missed. They had never been friends, but she found herself liking this version of Puck; he was more mature, but was still himself. Plus, it was sort of nice to have a familiar face around.

* * *

"Three."

"Four."

Rachel looked at Puck. "Four?"

"Yeah," Puck said, scratching the back of his head.

"Right this way," the hostess said.

"Noah," Rachel said, narrowing her eyes. "Who else is coming?"

"You'll see," Puck said with a shrug."

"I will have you know, I'm not a fan of surprises," Rachel said, following behind him. "Given my personality, you might think I am, but I detest them. When I was seven, my fathers threw me a surprise party and I cried during the whole thing."

"Calm down," Puck said as he sat down.

Rachel huffed, making sure Beth was seated before taking her seat. "Who said I'm not calm?"

"Your server will be right with you," the hostess said, leaving them alone.

"Just relax," Puck said, leaning his elbows on the table.

"If it's Finn—"

"It's not Finn," Puck interrupted.

Rachel sighed. "Good."

"I thought you two were okay," Puck remarked. "He told me you two had coffee when you were in Lima."

"We did," Rachel replied. "We had a nice chat, but that doesn't mean I wish to be friends with him. I'm afraid he would get the wrong idea about us if we were to attempt a friendship, and I already have too much going on in my life to deal with such a thing."

"He still talks about you," Puck said. "A lot. Sometimes he won't shut up about you. I even threatened to break his Xbox one time if he didn't stop talking about you."

"Well, he should have appreciated me more while we were together," Rachel commented. "Maybe then he could have come to New York with me and we would still be together."

"Is that what you woulda wanted?" Puck asked.

"No," Rachel said honestly. "I'm happy with the way my life is. Yes, I get lonely sometimes, but I'm confident I will find someone who appreciates me and loves me for me. Someone who isn't going to try to change me into someone I'm not." Rachel faltered as she looked across the restaurant. "Did Quinn Fabray just walk through the door?"

Puck looked up with a guilty expression.

"Noah!" Rachel hissed. "Is Quinn Fabray the reason you said four people?"

"Maybe," Puck replied.

Rachel's jaw dropped. "I can't believe you! How could you invite her and not tell me! She hates me! She spent all of high school bullying me and trying to bring me down!"

"How do you know she hasn't changed?" Puck asked.

"How would I have the chance to know?" Rachel asked back. "She barely spoke a word to me in high school that wasn't an insult, so it's not as if I've heard from her since then."

"Weren't you talking about second chances just, like, a few days ago?" Puck said.

Rachel huffed. "That's not the point." Rachel glanced across the room. "Oh, she's coming over."

Puck stood as the blonde approached. "Hey, Quinn."

"Puck," she said, nodding at him before her eyes drifted toward Rachel and Beth. "I wasn't aware it wasn't just going to be us."

"That makes two of us," Rachel mumbled.

"My bad," Puck said. "I thought I mentioned it."

"Uh huh," Quinn said, sitting in the empty seat.

"Excuse me," Rachel said, standing up, and grabbing her purse. "If our server ever comes will you tell them I would like a water with extra lemon? And will you keep an eye on Beth for a minute; I'll be right back."

Rachel pulled her phone out of her purse as she walked toward the bathroom, and she was already dialing Kurt's number by the time she was inside. It rang so long that she thought it was going to voicemail, but she eventually heard a click followed by the sound of voices in the background.

"Kurt!" she said before her friend could say anything.

"What is it?" Kurt asked. "Is something wrong? Is it Beth?!"

"No, nothing like that," Rachel quickly said, not wanting him to worry. "Though I am in a bit of a panic."

"What's going on?" Kurt asked

She could hear a door closing and the background noise becoming quieter, and she knew she had his undivided attention. "Noah brought me and Beth to dinner. He failed to tell me there was going to be a fourth."

"Okay," Kurt replied.

Rachel took a deep breath and then said, "Quinn Fabray is here. He invited Quinn Fabray and I didn't know she was coming until she walked through the door. I have never been a violent person, but I honestly want to slap Noah upside the head and ask him what he could possibly have been thinking. You know I don't hold a grudge—though if I did, Quinn and Santana would be the ones I would have it against—but I can't believe he would do this without telling me. He knows our history; he knows how Quinn feels about me, yet he apparently decided to invite her without either of us knowing the other was going to be here. I don't know why he ever thought this would be a good idea. And if he would have just warned me, you know I wouldn't have said no. You can't just spring something like this on a person, though; you need advanced notice when you're going to have dinner with the girl that did everything she could to make your high school experience a nightmare!"

"Are you done?" Kurt asked, sounding amused.

"Yes," Rachel said, taking another deep breath, and slowly releasing it.

"Do you feel better?" Kurt questioned.

"A little, yes," Rachel replied.

Kurt paused for a moment and then asked, "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know." Rachel sighed. "Have dinner with Quinn Fabray, I guess."

"Do you want to leave?" Kurt asked. "I can always call you back and pretend there's an emergency."

"No, no—I don't want to do something like that," Rachel said, shaking her head. "I—"

She paused when she heard one of the toilets flush behind her and blushed when the stall door opened. She was in too much of a hurry to call Kurt and didn't think about anyone else being in the bathroom to overhear their conversation.

"Are you still there?" Kurt asked.

Rachel hummed and watched as the woman washed her hands; she didn't want her to overhear anything else, so she stayed silent as she walked to the door. Just when she thought she was going to leave, the woman turned and said, "Good luck."

"Thank you," Rachel said, feeling herself blushing more.

"For what?" Kurt asked.

"Not you," Rachel replied. "I should go back out there, or they'll probably start wondering why I've been gone so long."

"Just say you were drawing pornographic picture of Quinn on the wall," Kurt joked. "You know, to get even."

"Very funny," Rachel said, rolling her eyes even though he wasn't there to see it.

* * *

Rachel took deep, calming breaths as she made her way back to the table. When she neared, she tried to look confident and like she hadn't had a minor freak out in the bathroom. She tried to never let the bullies at McKinley High realize how much they affected her, and she wasn't going to let it show now.

"Sorry, there was a line," Rachel lied as she sat in her seat.

She reached out and grabbed her glass of water, taking a sip, and then picking up the menu their server must have brought while she was away. She looked at Beth, who had a small box of crayons, and was coloring on the back of her menu.

"So, I wasn't aware you were in town, too," Rachel commented.

"I live here, actually," Quinn replied.

"Oh," Rachel said. "I didn't know that."

"I go to NYU," Quinn remarked.

"What are you studying there?" Rachel asked.

"Comparative literature," Quinn replied.

Rachel nodded. "Interesting."

Rachel had no idea she and Quinn had been living in the same city for the past two years. She was actually glad she didn't know, though; she probably would have worried about running into her—especially when she first moved there and high school was fresh on her mind—and she didn't want to have to worry about that. New York was her city; practically everyone she had ever met knew she was going to move there and pursue her dreams. It's why she was so surprised Quinn had ever moved there—as much as the blonde seemed to hate her, Rachel didn't think she'd ever want to live in the same city as her if she could help it.

They were all silent as they looked over their menus; well, Rachel was mostly just staring at it blankly, trying to process the turn of events. She and Kurt came here quite often, so she already knew her options, but no one else knew that so she held her menu in front of her face, figuring it was better than staring off into space.

"Have you looked over your menu?" Rachel asked, realizing she needed to figure out what Beth wanted. "They have spaghetti, chicken fingers, hamburgers—"

"Burger," Beth said before she could go on.

"Salad or fries on the side?" Rachel asked.

"First," Beth answered.

At least with the salad, she would be eating something a little healthier. She hated the thought of Beth eating meat, but she was picky as it was, and Rachel wasn't going to make it worse by trying to control what she ate. Besides, her fathers always let her make up her own mind on things—within reason, of course—and she wanted to do the same thing.

"So, is school over for you?" Puck asked.

"Yeah, Friday was the last day," Quinn answered.

"Cool," Puck said, nodding. "Rachel had this showcase thing today. She was awesome."

"Imagine that," Quinn said, locking eyes with Rachel, and then looking down at her menu again. "I'm not surprised; she always could sing better than anyone else."

Rachel waited for her to add something negative to the end of her statement, but she didn't. It was probably the first time Quinn had ever said anything that could actually be considered a compliment.

"Thank you, Quinn," Rachel responded.

"How long are you in town?" Quinn asked, looking at Puck.

"I leave tonight," he said, shrugging. "I could only get a few days off. Besides, I was afraid Finn would destroy the place if I was gone any longer. He's been there longer than I have, but I swear he doesn't know what he's doing half the time."

"That's not surprising," Quinn commented.

"No, it's not," Rachel agreed before she could stop herself.

She heard her phone buzzing in her purse and pulled it out to find Kurt's name on the screen. Normally she wouldn't have answered it because it was a little rude, but she really didn't care at the moment.

"Hello, Kurt," she greeting.

"You sure you don't want an emergency?" Kurt asked.

Rachel laughed lightly. "No, it's fine."

"Are you sure?" Kurt asked.

"I'm sure," Rachel replied.

"Okay," Kurt said. "Text me if you change your mind. Bye."

"Goodbye," Rachel said, ending the call. "Sorry about that."

"So, you and Kurt are still friends?" Quinn asked.

Rachel nodded. "He's my best friend; we have an apartment together, and he's been really great about helping with Beth. I really don't know what I would do without him. Especially this past week; I had to prepare for my showcase and didn't really have a lot of time. My instructors postponed it for me, but that meant I really only had less than a week to really prepare. I did what I could in Lima, but one really needs a dance studio."

Rachel closed her mouth when she realized who she was talking to. Quinn didn't care about any of this; the only person she ever seemed to care about was herself. She wasn't interested in anything having to do with Rachel's life.

"Couldn't you have gone to the choir room?" Quinn asked. "I'm sure Mr. Schue would have let you use it."

"I would rather I never step foot in that school again if I can help it," Rachel replied. "It doesn't really hold the best memories for me, as I'm sure you understand."

"Yeah," Quinn mumbled. "Excuse me a moment."

Quinn stood up and Rachel watched as she headed in the direction of the bathroom before turning to Puck and asked, "Noah, why did you invite her?"

"I wanted her to see—" Puck nodded to Beth. "Look, I'm sorry, but I don't regret it. I didn't know if you'd let me invite her, and I figured if I told her you two would be here, she'd never come."

"Noah, I would never stop Quinn from coming," Rachel said, sighing. "You should have asked me, though, just like you should have asked if you could stay with us. You don't have to be sneaky and manipulative with me; all you have to do is ask."

"I was just afraid you'd say no," Puck said. "I'm sorry."

"I understand, but from now on—"

"I'll ask," Puck interrupted.

"Thank you," Rachel said, reaching for her water.

* * *

"I can't wait to make some tea and relax," Rachel said to Puck as she slid the door open to her apartment. "It has been a very long couple of days."

Beth immediately headed for her room while Rachel stopped to hang her purse on the hook next to the door. She started walking to the kitchen to put on the kettle but stopped.

"What are you doing home early?" Rachel asked upon seeing Kurt in the living room.

"I told Josh I would work late for him tomorrow night if he covered for me tonight," Kurt said, shrugging. "I wanted to be here when you came home to make sure you're okay."

"I appreciate the concern, but I'm perfectly fine," Rachel responded.

"I'm going to grab my bag and then head out," Puck said.

"Do you have to go already?" Rachel asked.

"I don't wanna miss my bus," Puck replied. "I got lost on the subway coming here, so I should go now in case it happens again."

"One of us could accompany you," Rachel suggested.

"Nah, it's fine," Puck said, grabbing his bag from beside the couch.

Rachel sighed. "Okay. Do you have everything? If you forget something, we can send it, but—"

"I packed while you were getting ready," Puck interrupted.

"Well—I guess we should say our goodbyes then," Rachel said, disappointed that Puck was leaving.

"I'm gonna go let Beth know I'm leaving," Puck said. "I'll be back."

"How'd dinner go?" Kurt asked.

"Surprisingly okay," Rachel said, watching Puck head into the other room.

"Really?" Kurt said, sounding very skeptical.

"Really," Rachel replied. "I mean, dinner was mostly silent, but that's far better than I was expecting the evening to go."

"What was she even doing here?" Kurt asked.

"She lives here, actually," Rachel answered. "I had no idea, but she goes to NYU; she's lived here for nearly two years."

"That's—huh." Kurt furrowed his eyebrows. "I would never have guessed. I thought she was always more the type that would marry before she got out of college—staying in Ohio, of course—and drop out when they decided to start a family. You know, the perfect Stepford Wife to some soon to be rich doctor or businessman."

"While I may not be Quinn Fabray's biggest fan, I have always thought she was very intelligent, so I am not at all surprised she left Ohio to attend school," Rachel said.

"Too bad she's always used it for evil and not good," Kurt remarked just as Puck walked out of Beth's room.

Rachel watched as Puck paused outside the curtain, taking a deep breath.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, just—you know," Puck said, putting his hands in his pockets, and walking toward them.

"You know you can come back anytime," Rachel said, hoping to cheer him up. "Just give one of us a call, and we'll have the couch ready for you when you get here. I want you and Beth to have a relationship; she lost the only family she knew, and she can use all the love she can get now. I know how much she means to you."

"It'll probably be a while," Puck said, shrugging. "I used up most of my vacation time."

"Well, we will probably be in Lima for a few holidays," Rachel said. "We don't normally go, but my fathers are insisting we come by more often, so they can see Beth. I actually promised them we would be there for the fourth of July, which is less than two months away, and I'll be sure to have Dad and Daddy invite you to their annual barbeque."

"That'll be cool," Puck said, giving her a slight smile.

"Remember," Rachel wrapped her arms around Puck, "you're welcome anytime."

"Just call, right?" Puck said, laughing, and returning her hug.

Rachel nodded, smiling. "I'll be sure to take plenty of pictures of Beth and send them to you. Just text me your email address, okay?"

"I will," Puck said, shouldering his bag.

"Test or call to let us know you made it back safely," Rachel instructed.

Puck nodded, clapped Kurt on his shoulder, and said, "I'll see you guys."

She watched as he walked to the door and waved to him as he closed it. It had been nice having him around, and she hated to see him go. Hopefully he would have some time off soon, though, and could make it back to New York; if not, there was always the fourth of July. It seemed far away, but she knew how fast time flew, so it would probably be there before she knew it.

"Okay, back to Quinn," Kurt said.

"There isn't much else to say," Rachel said, walking to the couch, and sitting down.

"You spent, what—an hour or more with her?" Kurt asked. "There has to be _something_ else."

"I told you that dinner was mostly silent," Rachel said, shrugging. "Once our waitress came, no one said much; Puck tried to make conversation, but he wasn't very successful."

"So the only thing you know about her is that she goes to NYU?" Kurt asked.

"I don't know," Rachel replied. "She said something about majoring in some type of literature. She also said that she's staying in New York for the summer, and she made it sound like she hasn't been back to Lima since she left."

"Interesting," Kurt said, narrowing his eyes.

"What's interesting about that?" Rachel asked.

"It's just that for someone who spent so much time making sure she ruled high school, you would think she wouldn't be so keen to leave it behind," Kurt commented.

"Maybe she hated it as much as we did," Rachel replied. "Maybe she was just better at hiding it."

"We hated it so much because of people like her," Kurt stated.

Rachel sighed. "I'm not defending her-why would I—but I'm saying that we don't exactly know her."

"And whose fault is that?" Kurt asked.

"Definitely hers," Rachel said with a slight laugh. "I don't know how many times I tried to befriend her only to have her throw it in my face in one way or another. She seemed—I don't know—a little different tonight. More relaxed, I guess. And she didn't insult me once tonight; that has got to be a first."

"Well, you'll probably never know if she's changed," Kurt said. "I doubt you'll really see her again."

"Yeah," Rachel agreed. "Probably not."

"I'm going to check on Beth," Kurt said.

Rachel stood from the couch. "I'm going to make some tea."

"Want to watch a movie?" Kurt asked.

Rachel shrugged as she walked toward the kitchen. "Sure, but can it be something that's not animated? It's never too early to introduce children to musicals."

Kurt laughed. "We're going to be a terrible influence on Beth."

"Or a great one," Rachel said, smiling over her shoulder.

* * *

**So Quinn is finally there…**


	7. We Meet Again

**pierce22: I know the feeling; it was quite hard to write for a while.**

**texican: Yes, her reaction or nonreaction will be explained a bit.**

* * *

**Chapter 7 – We Meet Again**

Rachel anxiously tapped her foot against the floor; she didn't like waiting for things and she had been here nearly an hour. The ticking of the clock was grating on her nerves, and she really wanted to climb on the receptionist's chair to rip it off the wall. She took a deep breath as the thought entered her mind, knowing she was being ridiculous and overreacting. The room was just so quiet, though, other than the incessant ticking, and she was curious to know what was going on in the other room.

Beth had been in New York for nearly three weeks and not much had changed since she got there. Once Puck left, they'd fallen into a nice routine. Rachel worked at a coffee shop in the morning while Kurt watched Beth, and then Kurt went to work in the evening and Rachel took over looking after the little girl. Beth was still very much the same; she still didn't talk very much, only really speaking when she was asked a direct question. It was definitely worrying Kurt and Rachel. They knew it was going to take time—she did lose her mom, after all—but they both thought it was time she see someone, hoping a professional would be able to bring her out of her shell.

They both just wanted her to be okay and Rachel really hoped talking to someone would help. If Beth would even talk to the psychologist. Rachel was confident the woman would know all the tricks, though, because she was having very little luck in that department. She didn't want to push Beth, but she also wanted things to get better—for Beth to get better—and it was hard to know if she was doing the right thing most of the time.

She knew this was never going to be easy, but it was definitely much more difficult than she had anticipated.

She had been flipping through the same magazine the whole time, not really reading anything. Every time she got to the end, she would start at the beginning again, flipping mindlessly through it another time. She paused when she thought she heard movement near the door and looked up. The moment the door opened, Rachel was on her feet; Beth walked out with Dr. Gilmore, and Rachel smiled at the girl.

"I'll see you next week," Dr. Gilmore said, smiling down at Beth.

Rachel and the doctor locked eyes and the brunette gave a slight nod. Before Rachel ever brought Beth with her, she met with the therapist, explaining the situation. Their plan was for Beth to attend the sessions alone for the first couple of weeks; Dr. Gilmore wanted to see if she could get Beth to open up first, and then they would involve Rachel and even Kurt. They all thought it would be productive for the doctor to gain Beth's trust first and hopefully build a rapport.

"Are you ready to go?" Rachel asked, putting her hand on Beth's shoulder.

The girl shrugged and Rachel led her to the elevator. Part of her hoped things would be better after only one session, but, realistically, she knew that wasn't going to happen. Rachel just needed to be patient and let things run their course. It was difficult, however; Rachel was used to trying to make things better for the people she cared about.

"So, how did it go?" Rachel asked as they stepped onto the elevator and she hit the button for the ground floor. "What did you two talk about?"

"Stuff," Beth answered.

Rachel actually rolled her eyes at the answer and tried not to laugh. Beth reminded her so much of Puck and Quinn sometimes that she couldn't help but want to laugh.

"Do you like Dr. Gilmore," Rachel asked.

Beth shrugged, but then nodded slightly, so Rachel took that as a good sign. If she hadn't, there were plenty of other child psychologists around, and she was willing to take her to different ones until she found one that she did like. Dr. Gilmore had come highly recommended, though.

The two silently walked out of the elevator and through the lobby, toward the exit. She reached out for Beth's hand the moment they were on the sidewalk, not wanting her to get lost in the crowd. She was off today and she didn't really have anywhere to be—the first in a while—so she tried to think of something to do.

"Would you like to go to the park?" Rachel asked. "Or maybe get ice cream or—"

"Ice cream," Beth replied.

"Ice cream it is," Rachel said with a smile and a nod.

She turned left, heading toward Phil's ice cream cart since it was the best. As she walked along the sidewalk, though, Beth tugged on her arm and she stopped to look down. Beth was looking across the street and Rachel followed her gaze, but didn't know what she was looking at. She tried to start walking again, but Beth didn't seem to be going anywhere. The little girl actually tugged on her arm and pointed across the street.

"What is it?" Rachel asked.

"Your friend," Beth said.

Rachel frowned, looking across the street again, but still didn't know what Beth was pointing at. She also didn't know what she meant by 'your friend'. As far as Rachel knew, Kurt was the only friend of hers that Beth had met, and Puck if you counted him. Rachel didn't have many friends; just a few people at NYADA, but Beth hadn't met any of them.

"Who are you talking about, Beth?" Rachel asked.

"Your friend," Beth repeated.

Rachel frowned. "Who are you—oh."

Rachel finally saw who Beth was talking about; Quinn was standing on the other side of the street, talking into her phone. Rachel wondered if she walked away quick enough if the blonde wouldn't see them. While dinner with her hadn't been completely unpleasant, she didn't want to push her luck by having to interact with Quinn without someone else there as a buffer. However, just as she turned to walk away, Quinn looked across the street right at her. Rachel cursed under her breath and put on a fake smile; she obviously couldn't just walk away now even if she really wanted to.

Quinn gave them a small wave and looked both ways before running across the street. Rachel watched as she ran over; she couldn't believe her luck. Today had been going relatively well, too. She was off work, she had a nice breakfast with Kurt and Beth—her favorite episode of Friends had even been on when she turned on the television earlier.

"I'll call you back," Quinn said as she neared. "Because I'm busy. No." Quinn rolled her eyes. "I'm hanging up now." Quinn removed the phone from her ear and looked at Rachel. "Hi. I, uh—saw you and thought I would come over and say hi."

Rachel couldn't help but laugh. "Hello."

Rachel wanted to ask who she was speaking to—she was a bit nosy by nature—but then she reminded herself that Quinn hated her and it probably wouldn't be the smartest of questions.

"What are you two doing today?" Quinn asked.

"Ice cream," Beth answered.

"We are getting ice cream," Rachel said, smiling at the fact that Beth actually willingly spoke.

"Oh, that sounds like fun," Quinn replied.

"Would you—like to go with us," Rachel said.

Quinn shrugged. "Sure."

"Really?" Rachel said before she could stop herself.

Quinn laughed. "Why not?"

Rachel's eyebrows furrowed; she really didn't expect Quinn to take her up on the offer. "There's an ice cream place just down this way."

Rachel turned, still holding Beth's hand, and began walking down the sidewalk. The walk was silent—awkwardly so, not the comfortable silence that she often fell into with Kurt—as Rachel tried to think of something to say. Discussing the weather seemed a bit ridiculous, but she didn't know what to say to the girl who spent her whole high school career making her life anything but pleasant.

She really knew nothing about Quinn; every time she tried to talk to the blonde before, her attempts were rebuffed. She never really knew why, either. Despite Quinn's attitude, Rachel always tried to stay pleasant during what little conversations they had. It never had much effect, though; she was never able to get through Quinn's icy facade. That just made her behavior now all the more confusing since Quinn was willing talking to her—or at least willingly walking beside her.

They walked to Phil's cart, got their ice cream, and immediately headed to the park. As they walked toward the ducks, Beth let go of Rachel's hand and ran ahead a little bit. Rachel just smiled at the sight; it was nice to see the little girl excited about something since it happened so rarely.

"She's happy," Quinn commented.

Rachel hummed. "She does seem to like the ducks."

Quinn paused for a moment as she licked her ice cream, and then asked, "How is she doing?"

"Okay, I think," Rachel said, sighing. She glanced at Beth and then looked back at Quinn. "We just came from an appointment with a child therapist; Kurt and I thought it would be beneficial. She doesn't talk a lot, and we're a little worried about her. I know it's going to take time, but we both figured it was better to be safe than sorry."

Quinn turned and leaned against the bridge they were standing on, looking away from Beth. Rachel could tell she was uncomfortable with the conversation and decided she should probably change the subject.

"What were your plans for today?"

"Well, I wanted to see some of the museums around since it is my day off, but my roommate wants me to go grocery shopping." Quinn rolled her eyes.

"Is that who you were talking to on the phone?" Rachel asked, glancing at Beth to make sure she was okay.

Quinn nodded. "I should never have moved in with her, but I wanted out of the dorms and needed a roommate." Quinn sighed. "I should actually go; if I don't come back with groceries, she'll probably burn my bed or something."

Rachel's eyebrows rose. "Is your roommate crazy?"

"A little," Quinn said with a light laugh. "Thanks for letting me join you."

"Thank you for coming," Rachel said.

Quinn actually gave her a smile before she turned and started walking away. Rachel looked at Beth, wondering what just happened; this was the nicest she had ever known Quinn Fabray to be. It was actually a little unnerving.

"Hey."

Rachel turned around and looked at Quinn.

"I was wondering if we could meet sometime," Quinn said, shrugging. "Maybe get coffee or have lunch. You know, to catch up."

"I—o-okay," Rachel stuttered. "I suppose I should give you my phone number."

"Maybe," Quinn said, smirking a bit.

Rachel held out her hand and Quinn pulled her phone out of her purse, handing it to her. The brunette put her contact information in and handed Quinn's phone back.

"I'll call you," Quinn said.

Rachel nodded and Quinn turned to leave again, this time actually walking away. Rachel frowned, shaking her head; there had been a lot of unexpected things happening in her life recently, and this was yet another one of them.

* * *

The moment Rachel slid the front door shut, Kurt poked his out from his room. Beth walked off to the living room and Rachel heard the television turn on a few moments later. Rachel threw her purse onto the kitchen table as Kurt walked in. He was in his waiter outfit, ready to go to work, and she looked at the clock; he really should have left already, but he was clearly waiting for their return.

"How did it go?" Kurt asked when she didn't say anything.

"I'm not entirely sure," Rachel replied.

"She didn't say anything?" Kurt asked.

Rachel sighed. "Does she ever?"

"Touché," Kurt replied.

"At least she seemed to like Dr. Gilmore, but when I asked what they talked about, all she said was 'stuff'." Rachel looked into the other room. "I didn't press the issue."

"She didn't say anything else?" Kurt asked.

Rachel shook her head. "To be fair, we were interrupted."

Kurt frowned. "By what?"

"Quinn," Rachel stated.

"Quinn Fabray?" Kurt asked.

"How many other Quinns do you know?" Rachel replied. "Yes, Quinn Fabray. We had just walked out of the therapist's office and Beth saw her across the street. She saw us before I could sneak away."

"That's it?" Kurt said.

"Actually, she came with us to get ice cream and then went with us to the park, but she had to leave right after we got there," Rachel continued.

"How was it?" Kurt asked, taking a seat at the kitchen table.

"Aren't you going to be late for work?" Rachel asked.

Kurt waved her off. "It'll be fine. I cover for people all the time; someone can do it for me for once."

"It was strange," Rachel said, sitting down as well. "Very awkward."

"Understandable," Kurt replied, with a nod.

"I just don't know what to say to her, you know?" Rachel said. "At least when she was calling me names, I knew where I stood with her. Quinn being nice to me is disconcerting, and I keep waiting for the punch line because it is obviously a joke of some kind. Quinn Fabray isn't nice to people; she pretends to be nice to get what she wants."

"I thought you said you didn't hold grudges," Kurt commented.

Rachel huffed. "I don't. I'm merely stating a fact—Quinn Fabray is only nice to people if it is for her own personal gain. I don't have a grudge against her, but I also don't trust her."

"Which is probably smart," Kurt replied.

"She asked if we could meet some time for coffee or lunch," Rachel remarked. "She has my phone number." Rachel frowned. "I don't know how I feel about that."

Kurt laughed as he stood. "What are you going to do if she calls?"

"I suppose I will meet her wherever she wants to meet," Rachel answered. "It would be rude otherwise. She hasn't really given me a reason not to go—other than the obvious, but that was several years ago. So, I shall meet with her if that's what she wants. I just don't know what she could possible want to speak to me about. It's not as if we have anything in common really, and she's made it perfectly clear over the years that she dislikes everything about me."

"People do change," Kurt said, shrugging. "I believe you're the one that told me that."

"I know," Rachel said, sighing.

She wished she could believe that Quinn had changed; if anyone needed to change, it was her. As much as she always tried to stay on top, Rachel always thought she seemed terribly unhappy. Quinn was the most popular person at McKinley high—all the guys wanted to date her and all the girls wanted to be her—but Rachel could tell it still wasn't enough. Maybe it was being in Lima, though; Rachel could definitely sympathize with that.

"Any idea when this coffee and/or lunch will take place?" Kurt asked.

"No," Rachel replied.

"Too bad," Kurt said, sighing. "I'm a little curious myself about what she wants." He looked toward the living room. "So, Beth really didn't say anything about the appointment?"

"Nothing," Rachel replied. "Like I said, though, we were interrupted by Quinn. Maybe one of us can broach the subject again later."

"Well, I suppose I should go to work," Kurt said, grabbing his bag from the table.

"Possibly," Rachel said, smiling at him.

"I'll see you later tonight," Kurt said, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"Have fun," Rachel said, standing up. "Don't kill any of your inept coworkers."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "I can't promise anything."

Rachel laughed and Kurt walked over to where Beth was on the couch.

"I'm going to work," he said, ruffling her head, which caused her to scowl up at him. "Be good for Rachel; don't do that thing we talked about, okay? I'll see you in the morning"

Beth actually smiled; Rachel had no idea what Kurt was talking about, but the little girl seemed to know. Rachel's eyebrows rose in questioning, but Kurt just shrugged and smiled at her.

"See you later," Kurt said as he walked by.

Rachel walked into the living room, listening as the door shut a few moments later. Whatever Beth was watching—some cartoon on what looked like Nickelodeon—was just going off and Rachel sat down on the couch, grabbing the remote control.

"Do you want to watch a movie?" Rachel asked.

Beth shrugged. "Okay."

Rachel fumbled her way to the Netflix menu; Kurt had just taught her how to use it. She wasn't really good with technology, and it actually amazed her that Beth was only four years old, but was much better with the Blu-ray player than she was. She went through the children's section, pausing and smiling on one of the movies.

"Oh, A Little Princess; I loved this movie when I was a little girl." Rachel's smile turned into a frown. "On second thought, there are probably better movies to watch."

As she continued to flip through the selection, her frown deepened. The Land Before Time, Once Upon a Forest, The Lion King—there sure were a lot of movies about children, albeit cartoon animals, losing their parents. That wasn't exactly what she wanted Beth to see; she didn't need to be reminded of losing her mom.

"How about we watch Monsters, Inc.," Rachel suggested.

* * *

Rachel set her tea down and focused back on the newspaper, circling one of the ads. She was trying to find a second job for the summer; her job at the coffee shop was only part-time, though she had been working full-time lately while one of her coworkers were on vacation. That, however, was about to come to an end, and she would like to find a second part-time job. The coffee shop would be fine while she was in school since she would have a lot more going on then, but right now, she thought it would be beneficial to find a second job. Her fathers were paying for most things, but it would nice to have some extra money in case of an emergency.

Everything she looked at sounded boring, but the job at the coffee shop wasn't exactly the most thrilling thing in the world. Still, it was a paycheck and that's what she needed at the moment.

She jumped slightly when there was a knock on the door. She looked at the clock, wondering if it was Kurt, though he generally didn't knock, but it wasn't time for him to be off work. She set the newspaper aside and walked to the door, hoping the knock didn't wake Beth up. When she slid the door open, she came face to face with her fathers' smiling faces. She let out a happy squeal and threw herself into Leroy's waiting arms.

"What are you doing here?" she excitedly asked.

Leroy laughed as he set her feet back on the ground. "We thought we would surprise you."

"Well, I'm most certainly surprised," Rachel replied.

"Come here, sweetie," Hiram said, enveloping her in a hug.

"I can't believe you two are here," Rachel said, hugging her father.

"Does that mean you're happy to see us?" Leroy asked, laughing.

"Of course!" Rachel replied. "I just can't believe you're here."

Rachel stepped aside to allow her fathers to enter; Leroy walked in first and she grabbed a bag from each of them to lighten their load a little bit.

"Honestly, we've wanted to come for several weeks," Hiram said as he walked past her.

"But we wanted to let you stand on your own two feet before we came," Leroy added.

"Yes, we thought it would better for you to settle in here with Beth without your dads in the way," Hiram said with a laugh. "Now that you seem to be settled, though, we thought it was the perfect time for a surprise visit."

Rachel smiled; she was definitely happy to see her fathers. She had been missing them more than usual lately. Taking care of Beth made her realize just how hard it was to be a parent and she suddenly appreciated hers all the more. She always knew it probably wasn't the easiest thing in the world, but she had no idea how difficult it would be. She was constantly worried if she was messing everything up and it was exhausting.

"You can take your bags into my room," Rachel said. "I'll sleep on the couch since it isn't exactly big enough for both of you. I'll be right back; I'm going to make sure Beth didn't wake up."

Hiram kissed the side of her head as he walked by and Rachel walked towards Beth's room. She wanted to make sure the little girl didn't wake up when her fathers came—or when she shrieked in surprise. When she looked in, Beth shifted a little, but her eyes were closed and she still appeared to be asleep. Rachel stood there for a moment, making sure Beth really was asleep, and then closed the curtain. She sighed and walked across the room to her bedroom to make sure her fathers had everything they needed.

"Let me get you some clean sheets," Rachel said, walking over to the drawer she kept them in. "You know where the clean towels are. Is there anything else you need? You didn't forget anything at home this time, did you?"

"Probably," Leroy replied. "We'll let you know, though."

"You don't need to do that," Hiram said, taking the sheets from her when she started pulling the old ones off the bed. "I'm perfectly capable of changing a bed, and before you say we're your guests, we did actually spring this on you, so I don't think that applies."

"It always applies," Rachel said, putting her hands on her hips.

"Let's let your father do the hard labor, shall we?" Leroy joked. "I smell tea, and it's been far too long since I've sat down with my daughter, enjoying a good cup."

"Yes, just leave me here to do all the work," Hiram said.

"We will," Leroy said over his shoulder as he guided Rachel to the other room.

Rachel looked back and Hiram winked at her; she gave him a smile as she walked out of the room. She and her father walked into the kitchen and Rachel put on the kettle to make them both a cup of tea since she was sure hers would be cold by now, and then put on a pot of decaf for Hiram since he didn't like tea.

"How is everything going?" Leroy asked, sitting down at the table.

Rachel sighed. "Everything's fine."

"Really?" Leroy asked. "I know you keep saying that, but truthfully, how is it going?"

"Relatively fine," Rachel amended. "It's difficult at times, but Kurt's been a tremendous help. Beth had her first session with Dr. Gilmore the other afternoon and that appears to have gone okay. She hasn't said a lot about it, but she doesn't really say a lot about anything."

Leroy nodded in understanding. "Things will get better."

"I hope so," Rachel said with a sigh. "It would be nice not to have to worry so much."

Leroy laughed. "Honey, that's never going to go away. They may even be an adult, but that fear never goes away. I remember feeling I had the first day your father and I dropped you off at kindergarten; it's the same feeling I get every single time you leave after coming home for a visit. Adult or not, you're still my child."

"Fitted sheets are evil," Hiram said, coming into the room.

"Why do you think I volunteered you for the job?" Leroy asked.

"You're a terrible husband," Hiram stated.

Rachel smiled; she missed this. She missed sitting around the kitchen table with her fathers while they bickered and joked with one another. Seeing them always gave her hope for the future. They had been together for twenty eight years, but they were still very much in love. She wanted to have that kind of relationship with someone one day, and it would be nice to have a partner around to help her raise Beth.

Kurt was wonderful for now, but she knew they couldn't do this forever. She was the one that signed up to be Beth's guardian, not Kurt. It would be unfair to expect him to do this forever. Now that she was essentially a mother, though, she didn't know how easy it would be to find a significant other. It had been difficult enough before, but this was just going to make it that much harder.

"Be useful and make our tea," Leroy said when the kettle started to whistle.

Rachel laughed and put her hand on Hiram's shoulder. "You relax, Daddy, and I'll make the tea."

Despite everything, she was hopeful she would find love one day, and if she was really lucky, she would find a love like her fathers had.

* * *

**Reviews are always appreciated.**


	8. You Make Me Nervous

**Replying to people would just result in me saying "thank you" over and over again because your reviews have been wonderful. So, thank you to everyone that has been reading this and an extra thanks to everyone that takes the time to comment. You guys are awesome.**

* * *

**Chapter 8 – You Make Me Nervous**

Rachel grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator and then stared inside for a few moments. She really needed to do some grocery shopping; the fridge was nearly empty and the cabinets weren't much better. Kurt had cooked dinner the previous night, but they had mostly been living off takeout or going to restaurants the last few days. Her fathers were used to it, though; they both worked a lot, so they rarely cooked. At least when they came to New York they were able to eat at places other than their usual.

She smiled when she heard Leroy's laugh from the living room. Her fathers demanded she take them to the nearest toy store so they could buy some things for Beth. Once they were done there, they came home and Leroy immediately started assembling the massive dollhouse they bought her while Hiram and Beth did some finger painting.

Rachel closed the refrigerator door, realizing she was not going to find anything in there to eat and wondering if anyone else was hungry. It was almost lunchtime, so she knew she should probably go ask her fathers soon. They were just having such fun with Beth that she didn't really want to interrupt it.

"Rachel, your phone's ringing," Kurt said, bringing it into the kitchen.

Rachel looked at the phone; it was an unknown number and the call ended before she could answer it. She looked at Kurt and shrugged. "They hung up."

She set the phone on the table and started to walk to the takeout menu drawer, but the phone started vibrating on the table. She looked at the screen and it was the same number calling again.

"Hello, Rachel Berry speaking," she said, answering the phone.

There was a light laugh on the other end. "It's Quinn—Quinn Fabray."

"Hello, Quinn," Rachel said.

Rachel was surprised Quinn was calling. She knew the blonde said she wanted to meet up sometime, but she really didn't think she meant it or would follow through with calling.

"I know it's short notice, but I was wondering if you'd like to get coffee today," Quinn said.

"I, umm—" Rachel looked at Leroy, who was walking into the room. "I don't know; my fathers are in town and—"

"What's going on?" Leroy asked.

"Hold on a second, please," Rachel said into the phone before covering it with her hand. "A—friend is wanting to meet for coffee, but—"

Quinn wasn't a friend, but she didn't want to explain everything to them right now. While they never knew the extent of how miserable she was in high school, they had heard of Quinn Fabray. She had divulged some things to them, which included some of the emotional abuses the cheerleaders of McKinley—specifically Quinn and Santana Lopez—subjected her to.

"Go," Leroy interrupted. "If you want to that is. The three of us are here to look after Beth if you want to go."

Rachel paused for a moment and then said, "I can meet for coffee. Is 1:30 okay?"

Quinn told her the place and luckily Rachel knew exactly where she was talking about. They said their goodbyes and she hung up the phone with a sigh. She really didn't know if she was ready for this; the other two times she had no choice, but now that she knew she was about to meet with Quinn, she was a little nervous.

"Are you alright," Leroy asked.

Rachel hummed and looked up. "I'm fine." She looked at the time on the microwave. "I should probably get ready, though; I wouldn't want to be late."

* * *

Rachel had been staring into the mirror for far too long, but she couldn't seem to decide on an outfit. She currently had on a pair of jeans with a black tank top, but she didn't know about it. She looked at her bed and the four previous outfits she tried on. None of them seemed right and the rest of her closet wasn't fairing much better.

"Shouldn't you be leaving soon?" Kurt asked.

Rachel looked up at Kurt's reflection in the mirror. "Probably."

"What's wrong?" Kurt asked, coming fully into the room.

Rachel sighed. "I don't know why I agreed to meet with Quinn, but I'm finding myself regretting the decision."

"Is that why you're staring into the mirror?" Kurt asked, sitting down on her bed.

"I'm trying to find something to wear," Rachel said, looking down. "She always made me feel bad about my choice of clothing in high school and I don't want to give her the chance to do it again."

"Do you think she'll say something?" Kurt asked.

"I would hope not, but I don't exactly know, do I?" Rachel asked.

"High school was two years ago," Kurt stated.

"I am well aware of that fact, thank you," Rachel replied.

"I'm just saying that I know you're worried about meeting Quinn, but high school was over two years ago," Kurt continued. "I'm not saying you should forget or even forgive everything she did, but there is a chance she is a completely different person now. People grow, they mature, and they see the error of their ways. You're all about second chances, so maybe it would be easier on you if you go into this assuming the best."

"When did you become the optimistic one?" Rachel joked.

"I figure if you're being the pessimistic one, I need to balance things out," Kurt said, smirking.

Rachel sighed. "You're right."

"Of course I'm right," Kurt replied.

"I should just go into this hoping for the best," Rachel said, running her hands down her top. "High school was a while ago and maybe she has changed. I mean, college is different, right? It's not a popularity contest like high school is, so maybe she has realized that there is more to life than being on top."

"Exactly," Kurt replied.

Rachel sighed. "What if she hasn't, though? What if she's still the same Quinn and this is all one big elaborate prank?"

"Elaborate prank to do what?" Kurt asked.

"I can only assume to humiliate me in some way," Rachel replied. "Isn't that what it was always about? To show me my place in the social hierarchy and to let me know I'm beneath them."

Kurt frowned. "But what would be the point in that now?"

"I don't know," Rachel said, throwing her hands up. "I don't know what's going on in the mind of Quinn Fabray and I doubt I want to know."

"You're being paranoid," Kurt stated.

"I know," Rachel admitted. "But I can't help it. You know what it was like for me; it's hard to believe she would ever want to be in the same city as me, and it's nearly impossible to believe she would willingly invite me out for coffee. I don't know what she could possibly want to talk about other than Beth, but Noah said she hasn't even mentioned her since everything that happened at the beginning of our senior year. That's why I am at a loss for why she would want to meet with me, which leads me to think it's for some nefarious reason."

Kurt looked like he was about to speak, so Rachel held up her hand to shush him. "Don't say anything. I know how ridiculous I'm being. I just don't understand why she's seemingly being nice to me. I don't think she's ever said anything to me that wasn't an insult in one way or another, and now she's inviting me to coffee. I know people change and she very well might be one of those people, but I'm still a little skeptical about everything. Given everything, I do believe I have a right to be paranoid when it comes to her; it wouldn't be the first time she has tricked me."

"I know, sweetie," Kurt said sympathetically. "And I actually believe a little paranoia is probably healthy in this situation. Now, for what you should wear, I think what you have on is perfect. It's simple and you look fabulous."

"Really?" Rachel asked, looking down.

"Really," Kurt replied. "You've definitely come a long way from plaid skirts with reindeer sweaters."

"Thank you, Kurt," Rachel said, smiling at him.

Kurt shrugged. "It's my job as best friend."

Rachel laughed. "You do your job well."

"Now, don't you need to get out of here?" Kurt asked.

Rachel gasped as she looked at the time. "I'm going to be late!"

"Have fun," Kurt said as Rachel kissed his cheek before running out. "If you need anything, just call!"

"I will," Rachel yelled over her shoulder.

"Are you leaving?" Hiram asked.

"Yes," Rachel said, grabbing her bag. "I shouldn't be more than a few hours. Are you sure you're okay to watch Beth"

"Of course," Hiram replied. "You take care of her every day; allow us to do it for a little while. Go, have fun, and really enjoy your time. Don't worry about us here, okay? Your father and I are more than happy to spend this time with our semi-granddaughter."

Rachel smiled at Hiram and wrapped her arms around him. "I'm really glad you two are here."

"I'm glad we're here, too," Hiram replied. "Now, go have fun."

"I'll see you later," Rachel said, heading for the door. "I'm going out, Beth! I won't be too long!" She looked at Hiram. "Don't spoil her too much while I'm gone."

Hiram laughed. "I can't promise anything."

* * *

When Rachel walked into the coffee shop, she looked around for Quinn, but the blonde was nowhere to be seen. She looked at her phone; it was two minutes until their meeting time, so she figured Quinn would be here by now. The other woman hadn't tried to call and there were no text messages, so she assumed they were still on. Rachel walked up to the line, which was luckily short, and waited to place her order.

She looked at the door every time the bell jangled, but it was never Quinn. She looked at the time when she finally got her coffee and it was five after. There were several tables open, so she took the one in the corner, sitting so she could see the door. She thought about taking the one near the exit, so she could make a quick escape if she needed to, but she figured it would be more private where she chose—though she didn't know if that was a good thing.

Rachel had been sitting down for several minutes when the bell jangled again and Quinn came in. The two locked eyes and Quinn nodding toward the counter, Rachel assumed indicating that she was going to get something first, so she nodded. Rachel watched as the barista seemed to flirt with the blonde if his body language was any indication, while Quinn's posture was ridged. When Quinn finally got her drink, she turned around, rolling her eyes at Rachel. For once, Rachel knew it wasn't actually directed at her, but the result of the barista.

"I'm so sorry I'm late," Quinn said as she pulled out the seat and sat down.

"It's okay," Rachel replied. "I was nearly late myself."

They fell silent as they both sipped on their drinks. Rachel wanted to ask what Quinn wanted, but that seemed a little rude. She noticed Quinn's brows furrow a little bit, but as soon as it happened, her face was passive again.

"So, you said your dads are in town," Quinn suddenly said.

"Yes, they came for a surprise visit a few days ago," Rachel replied.

"Must be nice," Quinn said, taking another drink.

"Yeah," Rachel replied, detecting some sadness in Quinn's voice.

They fell silent again and Rachel played with the sleeve on her coffee cup; Quinn didn't look like she was going to say anything anytime soon, so Rachel said, "May I ask why you wanted to get coffee? I know you said it was to catch up, but we haven't exactly been friends, so I'm having a difficult time figuring out why you would want to meet here." Rachel frowned when Quinn started laughing. "May I ask what is so funny?"

Quinn laughed. "You're still the same. You know, with the way you speak."

"It happens more when I'm nervous," Rachel said with a shrug.

Quinn's eyebrow rose. "You're nervous?"

"You didn't answer my question," Rachel said, trying not to blush at what she just admitted.

Quinn took another drink and then set her cup down on the table. "Getting straight to the point I see. I want to know if I could see Beth some."

"You want to see Beth," Rachel repeated.

"Yes," Quinn replied.

"I was under the impression from Noah that you wouldn't want to be involved in her life," Rachel stated.

"Things change," Quinn replied.

"May I ask why you didn't try to gain guardianship of her when you had the chance?" Rachel asked.

"Because I didn't want her." Quinn shook her head. "That came out wrong. I mean that—I've spent every day since she was born trying to not think about her. I try not to think about what she looks like and how much she's grown and what her favorite toy is and if she looks like me. I didn't try to get custody of her because I was trying to pretend she didn't exist—to forget about her. But that all changed when I saw her. It's hard to not think about her when I've seen her."

"Did you know Beth and I were going to be at that restaurant?" Rachel asked.

Quinn shook her head. "No. I had no idea or I wouldn't have gone. That was all Puck's doing; I think he wanted me to see her. Believe me, I was completely shocked and didn't know what to do or say." Quinn let out a light laugh. "I tried to look unsurprised, but I was freaking out a lot."

"He does have a habit of doing that," Rachel replied.

"I know you don't really like me, but I'm not the same girl from high school," Quinn said. "I was pretty horrible to you and I'm sorry. I have grown up, though."

"Have you really?" Rachel asked.

"I like to think so," Quinn said, smiling slightly. "You have no reason to trust me, but I'm asking you to anyway."

"You can see Beth," Rachel replied. "However, it will be on my terms."

"Fair enough," Quinn replied.

"Beth has been through enough recently and I don't want her to get confused," Rachel said. "She lost her mom and I'm only a little better than a stranger. I'm sure it's confusing enough living with me and Kurt, but now all these other people are coming into her life. I don't want to keep you or Noah away from her, but I'm also trying to think of what's best for her."

"As you should," Quinn remarked.

"What I'm asking is that you don't let her know who you are," Rachel continued. "Don't let Beth know you're her biological mother. I'm already worried she's going to think I'm trying to replace Shelby, and with you, it would only make the situation worse."

"Don't worry, I have no intention of letting her know who I am," Quinn said, picking up her coffee cup again. "I just want to see her—get to know her."

"Then we're in agreement," Rachel replied.

Quinn nodded and played with the coffee cup sleeve. "So—how have you been?"

"What?" Rachel asked.

"I believe I said I wanted to meet for coffee to catch up," Quinn said.

"Yes, but I assumed that was just a ploy for what you really wanted," Rachel replied.

"A little bit," Quinn said, shrugging. "But that doesn't mean I'm not interested."

"I've been okay all things considered," Rachel answered.

Quinn nodded. "I was sorry to hear about Shelby. Did you two ever—were you close?"

"No," Rachel replied sadly. "We talked through email every now and then. The last time I saw her was over a year ago." Rachel shook her head. "Other than that, things have been going well. I just finished my second year at NYADA, and I've been doing well there. Last year I almost won the role of Fanny Brice in the revival of Funny Girl, but I lost out to some woman that probably slept with one of the producers because there was no way she was better than me. I deserved that part."

Quinn laughed. "I don't doubt that. I know I never said it before because I couldn't possibly say anything nice—how could I—but I've always thought your voice was amazing."

Rachel ducked her head, surprised by the compliment. She was used to people complimenting her voice, but it felt different coming from Quinn—from someone she was used to insulting her.

"I hate to run," Quinn sighed, "but if I don't go, I'm going to be late getting back to work."

"Well, we can't have that," Rachel said with a smile.

"I thought I would have more time, but it took longer than expected to get out of the office," Quinn said, frowning slightly.

"Where to you work?" Rachel wondered.

"At this small publishing company," Quinn said. "They do small orders for unknown authors. It's just a summer thing; one of my professors set me up with it."

"That sounds interesting," Rachel replied.

Quinn shrugged. "It's not bad."

"We should do this again," Rachel said. "Maybe some place that doesn't serve coffee, though."

"Not a fan?" Quinn asked.

"Oh, I'm a huge fan, but I recently started working as a barista, so I'm having work flashbacks just sitting here," Rachel said with a light laugh.

"Should I call you?" Quinn asked. "You know, if I want to see Beth?"

"That would be fine," Rachel said with a nod. "We can set up a time for you to come over or we could even meet somewhere."

"Okay," Quinn said, standing up. "Thank you, Rachel."

"You're welcome," Rachel said before watching Quinn walk away.

That went remarkably better than she thought it would. And she was also pretty sure that was the first time Quinn had ever referred to her by her first time. The closest she'd ever come before was calling her by her surname, but she was usually called by names that were a little more colorful.

* * *

Rachel slid the door closed and immediately noticed how quiet the room was. When she walked in, there was no one in the apartment but Kurt, who was sitting on the couch, reading a book.

"Where is everyone?" Rachel asked.

"Your dads took Beth out right after you left," Kurt replied.

"Where did they go?" Rachel asked.

Kurt shrugged. "They didn't say."

"Shouldn't that be the type of thing you ask?" Rachel replied.

"Rachel, they're your fathers," Kurt said, rolling his eyes. "It's not like they're going to take her some place they shouldn't."

"I'm aware of that, Kurt, but shouldn't we know where she is going?" Rachel asked. "Or at least I should. I am the one responsible for her."

"I assume the meeting with Quinn didn't go well," Kurt said.

Rachel furrowed her brows. "What makes you think that?"

"You're lecturing me," Kurt stated.

"Sorry," Rachel said, laughing lightly. "Actually, coffee went fairly well; much better than I was expecting. Unfortunately it was cut short because she was a bit late and then she had to leave to go back to work, but she was—dare I say it—actually nice."

"See, there was nothing to worry about," Kurt replied.

"That's easy for you to say," Rachel said, rolling her eyes. "For all I know it could still be an act. Quinn has always been good at pretending to be whoever she needed to be to get what she wants."

"And what did she want?" Kurt asked.

"To see Beth," Rachel said, sitting down next to him.

Kurt nodded slowly. "Are you going to let her?"

"I am," Rachel replied. "I did tell her, though, that she isn't to let Beth know who she is. Maybe when Beth is older, but right now, I don't want her life becoming even more confusing than it already is. I won't keep Quinn or Noah away from her if they want to be in her life, but I also want what's best for Beth. So, for now, she can just know them as people we are friends with."

"Are you sure it's a good idea?" Kurt asked.

"No," Rachel sighed. "but it's the best I can think of for now. I know they gave her up, but it doesn't feel right to deny them to see her. I know what it's like to be Beth, and if Shelby had wanted to see me, but my fathers turned her away, I wouldn't be very happy about it. I figure if they want to be in her life, they should be allowed to be in it."

She could hear her fathers' laughter just outside the door and then the sound of it sliding open. When she looked across the room, Leroy was coming in behind Beth with several bags in his hands. She wondered what else they could possibly have bought her; they had always spoiled her while she was growing up and now they were doing the exact same thing with Beth. She didn't necessarily think it was a bad thing—she thought she turned out alright—but she didn't want them to feel like they had to do it. They were already spending a lot of money helping her through school, and she didn't want them to think they had to spend more.

"You look like you've had a productive outing," Rachel said, nodding to the bags.

"This one is your father's," Leroy said, holding up the one in his right hand. "He saw a shirt in the window and just had to go in; three pants, four shits, two ties, and a pair of shoes later, we finally made it out." He held up the bag in his left hand. "Then he noticed a children's boutique across the street."

"Oh no," Rachel said, laughing.

"Needless to say, Beth has a bunch of new outfits for when she starts kindergarten," Leroy said, smiling.

"You know you didn't have to do that," Rachel replied. "And you know she'll probably have to wear a uniform to school."

"No, but we wanted to," Leroy said, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"How did your coffee date go?" Hiram asked, collapsing in the armchair.

"It went okay," Rachel said, shrugging.

She and Kurt both watched as Beth walked into her room; Rachel started to get up, but Kurt put his hand on her arm to stop her.

"I've got it," he said, getting up.

"I think she's just a little sleepy," Leroy said.

"Was it a boy?" Hiram asked.

"What?" Rachel said, looking at him.

"The one you had coffee with," Hiram replied. "Was it a boy? Is there a new romance in your life that we don't know about?"

Rachel laughed and shook her head. "No, no—nothing like that."

Hiram narrowed his eyes. "I don't know if I believe you." He looked at Leroy. "Do you believe her?"

"It wasn't a guy," Rachel reiterated. "It was a girl."

"And what is this girl's name?" Hiram asked.

Rachel hesitated for a moment. "Quinn."

"Quinn," Hiram repeated. "As in the reason you came home crying on more than one occasion during high school? The Quinn that stole your boyfriend, threw frozen drinks in your face, and set up an elaborate prank for you to win prom queen just to make you think everyone had voted for you, only to announce to the school that it was a joke."

"How many other Quinns do you know?" Leroy asked.

Hiram paused for a moment and then said, "Quinn Morgendorffer."

"I highly doubt our daughter met with a fictional, animated character," Leroy replied.

"To be fair, I did steal Finn from her first," Rachel commented. "But yes."

"Are you two friends now?" Hiram asked.

"No," Rachel replied. "She wanted to talk about—"

"Beth," Leroy finished for her.

Rachel nodded. "She asked if she could see her."

"And you said?" Hiram asked.

"I said yes," Rachel answered, looking to make sure the little girl was still in her room. "I know what it's like to not know someone and wish you did. I don't want Beth growing up, wondering where she came from. She deserves to know that her biological mother does think about her and wants to know her. That being said, I did ask Quinn to not reveal who she truly is—that can come later."

"That's probably a wise decision," Leroy replied. "She's had enough upheaval in her life over the last two months."

"Beth will think Quinn is a friend just like Noah," Rachel said. "It's not as if she will really ask about it, so I'll just save that conversation for one day in the future."

Leroy cleared his throat and Rachel looked over her shoulder to find Kurt and Beth coming out of her bedroom. Leroy sat on the arm of the chair his husband was sitting in and Rachel scooted over to make room for the other two to sit on the couch.

"So, what do we want to do?" Rachel asked, smiling over her shoulder.

"I vote we sit right here," Hiram said.

"I'd like to go out," Leroy said.

"I wouldn't mind an afternoon in," Kurt said, shrugging as he walked around the couch to sit next to Rachel.

"I think I would like to go out," Rachel said. "You're only here for a few more days and I think we should do something."

"That's two votes to stay in and two to go out," Kurt said, looking at Beth. "You're the tiebreaker."

"Would you like to stay in or go out and do something?" Rachel asked.

"I wanna go out," Beth answered.

Leroy smiled. "I guess it's settled then."


	9. Carnival Lights

**Chapter 9 – Carnival Lights**

Rachel stared out the window, watching everything go by, slightly lost in thought. Sometimes she wished she could clear her mind and not worry about so many things. Only a few months ago her biggest worry was whether or not she was going to get a callback for an audition, but now she had to think about so much more. Now she had to worry about work and finding a second job and raising a four year old, which she still felt like she knew nothing about.

"How much longer?" Beth asked.

"We should be there soon," Rachel said, looking down at her.

Beth nodded. "Okay."

At least things with Beth were getting a little bit easier. She had her second session with Dr. Gilmore, and since then, Beth was talking a little more. Rachel didn't know if it was because of the therapy sessions or if it was just because more time had passed, but either way, Rachel was thankful. She knew they still had a long way to go, but any progress was wonderful.

Monday would be the first time Rachel would sit in on the session. She had spoken to the doctor, who filled her in on what she was doing with Beth and the things they discussed, but Rachel was eager to see it in person. She had to take off work to go, but it would be worth it—anything to help Beth was worth it.

"Eww, I think I stepped in gum," Kurt said, lifting his foot, and scrunching his nose in disgust. "I hate trains."

"They're not that terrible," Rachel replied.

"They're probably never cleaned," Kurt remarked.

"I'm sure someone cleans them," Rachel said, shaking her head, and smiling. "It would be unsanitary if they didn't."

"Well, clearly not enough," Kurt said, rubbing his shoe on the floor to get the gum off. "Why are people so disgusting? Is it so hard to put your gum in a receipt or something?"

"Kurt, you have lived in New York for two years, you should be used to stepping in gum," Rachel commented.

Kurt sighed. "Fine."

Beth giggled lightly and Rachel smiled at the sound; it was rare to hear her laugh, but it had been happening a little more in the past week. She still had her moments of being withdrawn, but instead of coloring quietly or watching a movie, she had actually asked them to play a board game with her the previous day. It probably wouldn't seem like a lot to most people, but Rachel and Kurt both knew it meant things were on the right track.

"I think we're almost there," Rachel said, looking out the window again when the train started slowing.

"Are you excited?" Kurt asked.

Beth nodded. "Yeah."

When Rachel's fathers were in town, they saw a flyer about some carnival outside of the city that was happening in a few weeks. Since they weren't going to be there during that time, they made Kurt and Rachel promise to take Beth. Her fathers always took her to things like the carnival or the circus when they were in town, and they apparently wanted Beth to experience the same thing even if they weren't around to do it. Rachel hadn't been to a carnival in a long time and Kurt had never been to one, so they readily agreed.

"Are you excited?" Rachel asked Kurt.

"A little," Kurt said before smiling. "Alright, yes. When I was little I didn't really want to go to these things—too many greasy foods and weird people—but now that I'm an adult, I actually feel like maybe I missed out."

"The food is gross," Rachel remarked. "I'm pretty sure I decided to forgo meat after one ill-fated carnival experience. The rides and games can be fun, though. My favorite part was always the Ferris wheel; I love when it stops at the top and you can see everything." Rachel stood and held out her hand for Beth. "Time to get off the train."

"Can I get one of those cotton candies?" Beth asked.

"You can," Rachel replied. "Do you still have your money?"

"I think," Beth said, putting her hand in her pocket.

Leroy had given Beth money for the carnival. Beth wanted to hold onto it, but Rachel didn't think it was the best idea to let a four year old carry fifty dollars, so the little girl had ten of it while Rachel had the rest. Her father made her promise that she would let Beth get whatever she wanted—within reason, of course. Rachel hoped she didn't regret that promise, but as long as Beth didn't spend it all on sugary treats, she figured it would be okay.

* * *

"Do you see her?" Rachel asked.

"Over there," Kurt said, nudging Rachel toward the right.

Rachel scanned the crowd for a moment and then she spotted her; Quinn was leaning against the fence that surrounded the carnival area.

"Are you ready?" Kurt asked.

"One moment," Rachel said, taking a few deep breaths. "Okay."

Quinn had called a few days prior, wondering if she could see Beth sometime that weekend. It had been the first time Rachel had talked to her since getting coffee, and she had actually began to wonder if her former classmate was ever going to call. At first she told Quinn that they were going to be busy that weekend, but then she decided to ask if she wanted to come to the carnival with them. Rachel still wasn't sure about Quinn or her intentions, so she thought it would be a good idea if they all met somewhere outside of her and Kurt's apartment. She figured it would be less awkward since there were a lot of things to distract them there.

They began walking toward Quinn, who also spotted them and started making her way toward them. Rachel quickly looked down at her outfit; Kurt picked it out for her since she was having trouble again. She knew she was being slightly irrational about it, but after being made fun of for years, she wanted to show that she was more fashionable now. Once again, she was wearing jeans—something she almost never wore in high school—and a t-shirt from a concert she went to while she was dating Brody. It wasn't something she would have worn, but Kurt pretty much forced her wear it.

"Hey," Quinn said, giving her a smile before looking at Kurt. "It's been a while."

"Yes, it has," Kurt said, crossing his arms over his chest, and giving her a tight smile.

While Quinn had never bullied Kurt—that honor was solely reserved for Rachel—he had never been her biggest fan. At least not since he became friends with Rachel; before that they had been on slightly friendlier terms.

"How have you been?" Quinn asked.

"Fine," Kurt replied. "You?"

Quinn shrugged. "Good, I guess."

Kurt hummed and nodded; Rachel looked between the two and then said, "So, what do we want to do first?"

"I want one of those," Beth said, pointing to one of the booths, and then pulling on Kurt's hand. "Get me one."

"The stuffed animals?" Kurt asked.

Beth nodded. "Please."

"Alright," Kurt said, looking uncertain.

"Good luck," Rachel said, laughing.

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather have Rachel try to win one?" Kurt asked. "Or Quinn? I'm sure either of them will have a better chance at winning than I will."

"I want you," Beth replied.

Kurt sighed. "Okay."

Rachel couldn't help but laugh. "Poor Kurt; he is not a fan of physical exertion."

"I remember," Quinn said, smiling slightly.

Rachel stood back and watched as Kurt attempted to throw a ball and knock over some pins. He completely missed the first time, hit the stand they were on the second time, and managed to knock two down on his third try. He frowned and pulled out his own money the second time, getting three more balls.

"I wonder how many times he's going to try," Quinn remarked.

"I think we may be here a while," Rachel replied.

She watched as Kurt tried a second time to win one of the stuffed animals for Beth. He knocked down three pins in his first try, but missed the other two times. Rachel shook her head as he put down money to try a third time; she wondered how many times he was going to try before giving up, but he looked fairly determined.

"Are your dads still in the city?"

Rachel averted her eyes from Kurt and looked at Quinn. "No, they went back to Lima last weekend. They both had to get back to work or I'm fairly certain they would have stayed all summer. They adore Beth and are already spoiling her like crazy. They're already calling her their granddaughter" Rachel paused. "I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?" Quinn asked.

"I just—I don't know," Rachel replied.

"I give up," Kurt said, throwing his hands in the air, causing Beth to giggle. "Can I try winning you a stuffed animal somewhere else? Somewhere that isn't rigged and doesn't require me throwing these stupid balls at those stupid pins."

Beth grabbed Kurt's hand and pulled him several booths down to one with other stuffed animals. He looked dubiously at the booth—one with darts that had to be thrown at balloons—and Rachel shook her head, smiling. She figured he would at least have a slightly easier time winning something at this game.

* * *

"Can we go on it?" Beth asked, looking up.

"Of course we can," Rachel replied, looking at the Ferris wheel. "Who would you like to ride with?"

"Kurt," Beth said, grabbing his hand, and dragging him toward the ride.

"She's really taken with him, isn't she," Quinn commented.

"Is it possible for a four year old to have a crush?" Rachel asked.

Quinn laughed. "I don't know."

Rachel wanted to go on the Ferris wheel, but she was apprehensive about asking Quinn if she wanted to go on it. They were actually getting along, but she didn't know how it would go if they were stuck on a ride together. Even though she was being nice to her, Rachel was constantly expecting Quinn to revert back to her old ways. Part of her felt like she was being unfair, but then the other part would remind her why she was so distrusting of the blonde.

"Do you want to go on the Ferris wheel?" Quinn asked.

"Oh, umm." Rachel looked at Quinn and then looked up again.

"You're not afraid of heights, are you?" Quinn asked.

"No, I am not," Rachel replied. "And, yes, I would like to go on the Ferris wheel."

Quinn nodded and the two got in the short line, which only consisted of Kurt and Beth, who were at the front, and a couple of teenagers. Rachel's stomach grumbled a bit and she was beginning to regret not eating on the way. There was very little she could or would eat at the carnival and it didn't seem like they were going to leave anytime soon. Beth was having fun, though, so Rachel felt like it was worth it, and she would gladly wait until she got home to eat.

"She seems a lot happier," Quinn commented as Kurt and Beth got on the ride. "I mean, at the restaurant and the park she didn't really say very much."

"Yeah," Rachel agreed. "A few days ago she just started opening up a little more. I don't know if the therapy sessions are helping or if she is simply becoming more comfortable with us."

"Either way, it's a good thing," Quinn said.

"A very good thing," Rachel replied.

They fell silent and Rachel waited patiently for their turn. As Kurt and Beth went around, Rachel took a picture of them with her phone and immediately sent it to her fathers. It only took about fifteen seconds before Hiram texted her back, telling her to take more pictures and to call them the next day with all the details.

"You didn't have to do that," Rachel said when Quinn handed over one of her own tickets for Rachel to get onto the Ferris wheel.

Quinn shrugged. "I think I bought way too many tickets."

"Yes, there are not many grownup rides here to use them on," Rachel remarked. "It's a shame, really. Going on the rides was my favorite part when I was a child."

"Did you go to a lot of carnivals?" Quinn asked.

"At least once a year," Rachel said, sitting down on the ride. "My fathers liked taking me."

"I think I've only been twice," Quinn said, joining her. "My sister took me once when I was little—it was one of the few things we ever did together—and then Finn took me to one while we were dating." Quinn cleared her throat. "I have to say, this is actually more fun than either of those times. My sister ditched me for her friends after only an hour and Finn was—well, he got really mad when he couldn't win this stuffed monkey for me and sulked the rest of the evening."

The ride moved, swinging them a bit and Rachel looked over the side. She saw Kurt, who was also looking around, and gave him a wave, smiling at Beth when she looked her way.

"Do you ever talk to him?" Quinn asked.

"Finn?" Rachel asked and Quinn nodded. "Not really, no. I talked to him a few times while I was in Lima for the funeral and everything, but that was the first time I had seen him since we broke up. Kurt is the only one I have remained in contact with since graduation. Then again, I wasn't really close to anyone else during high school, so I suppose it's not surprising." Rachel paused for a moment. "I suppose you're still friends with everyone?"

Quinn laughed. "No, not at all. Just Santana—sort of; I don't know if you'd call us friends. I talk to Puck every now and then, and Mercedes calls sometimes, but that's it."

"Do you ever visit Lima?" Rachel wondered.

"I usually go a couple times a year," Quinn replied. "Usually once during the summer and Thanksgiving or Christmas—whichever my mother isn't visiting my sister."

"Kurt and I are going for the fourth," Rachel commented. "My fathers made us promise while they were here; they want us to come so they can see Beth, and they just got this new grill and want to have a cookout. "

The ride came to a halt while they were at the top, and Rachel smiled at the view. "I've always preferred sunsets over sunrises."

"It is beautiful," Quinn replied.

"Yes, it is," Rachel agreed, pulling her phone out to take a picture.

* * *

About an hour after the sun set, the foursome decided to head home. Beth was beginning to get tired from all the excitement and Rachel was exhausted since she worked all morning before coming to the carnival. They had been there for quite a while; Beth's money was nearly gone and Kurt had a very large stuffed animal that he had been carrying around for a half an hour. As much as he complained about lugging it around, Rachel knew he was proud of himself for winning it. It took him four different tries, but he eventually managed to toss a ring onto a bottle to win it for Beth.

Rachel noticed on the train ride back that Quinn kept looking at Beth, who was curled up between Rachel and Kurt. Quinn hadn't said much to Beth the whole time they were at the carnival, but Rachel thought it was understandable. She didn't know the blonde very well, but she knew if it was her in this situation, she probably wouldn't know what to say, either.

"Are we home?" Beth mumbled.

"We'll be off the train soon, sweetie," Kurt replied.

"I'm tired," Beth said, shifting.

Rachel laughed lightly. "I know, but we'll be home soon."

"Not soon enough," Kurt said, yawning.

"When did we get so old?" Rachel asked. "It's not even eleven yet and I just want to crawl into bed."

"Apparently taking care of a child will do that to you," Kurt said, shrugging. "We're no longer footloose and fancy free individuals that we once were."

"Were we ever really footloose and fancy free?" Rachel asked.

"Maybe for a month or so," Kurt replied with a shrug.

Rachel looked up when Quinn groaned; the blonde was looking at her phone and rolling her eyes. "Is something wrong?"

"My roommate is an idiot," Quinn replied.

"Roommates usually are," Kurt remarked.

"I resent that," Rachel said, frowning. "What did she do?"

"She knew I left my keys at home so I didn't have to bring them with me, and she apparently just decided to go out," Quinn said, rolling her eyes. "She swore she was going to stay in tonight, but now I'm going to have to try to track her down so I can get her keys to get into the apartment."

"You could stay with us," Kurt said.

Rachel gave him a sharp look. While she'd had a fairly pleasant evening with Quinn, she was apprehensive about having the blonde come to their apartment. Even though she knew asking her to come was the right thing to do, she still didn't want to push her luck.

"I'll be okay," Quinn said, shaking her head. "It's not the first time she's done something like this and I doubt it will be the last. Hopefully she's at the club near our apartment."

The train started coming to a stop and Beth shifted again, and Rachel wondered if she would be able to wake up enough to walk. She supposed Kurt could carry her if not, but that meant she would have to carry the stuffed animal, which was well over half her size.

"Beth, honey," Rachel said, shaking the girl. "Can you get up?"

Beth mumbled something that Rachel couldn't quite make out and then opened her eyes. She yawned and sat up, appearing slightly dazed as she looked around.

"Are you ready to go home?" Kurt asked, holding out his hand.

"Uh huh," Beth said, nodding.

"Rach, grab the penguin," Kurt instructed.

Rachel frowned and grabbed the large penguin, which only made Quinn laugh. She couldn't really blame the blonde, though; she knew she must look ridiculous with it.

"Do you need any help with it?" Quinn asked.

"I've got it," Rachel said, sighing. "But if you do want to sleep on our couch, I will gladly give it to you to carry."

Quinn laughed again. "I would probably take you up on that, but I need to get up early, and who knows if my roommate would be back by the morning."

"Understandable," Rachel replied with a nod.

"Thank you for letting me come with you guys today," Quinn said. "I had fun."

"So did I," Rachel replied. "Maybe next time we can do something a little more low-key and you can get to know Beth a little better."

"So, it's alright if I call again?" Quinn asked.

"Of course," Rachel replied.

"Okay," Quinn said, a faint smile gracing her lips.

The blonde turned around and walked toward Kurt and Beth, saying her goodbyes to them as well. Rachel let her know that if she couldn't find her roommate, the offer to let her sleep at their place still stood. When she parted from them, Rachel realized she was actually glad Quinn came. It was nice getting to know her a little better and seeing that there was more to her than the bitchy façade she put on in high school. Still, part of Rachel wondered if it could all just be an act—another prank that would result in her feeling like a fool yet again.

* * *

"How is she?" Kurt asked.

"I think she was having a nightmare," Rachel said quietly as she closed the curtain to Beth's room. "She seems to be okay now."

Rachel sat down at the table and rubbed her eyes; she was tired, but she didn't think she could fall asleep. After the excitement of the day, she was a little too wound up and needed to relax a bit before finally lying down. Luckily Beth was completely worn out, so Rachel was able to get her to sleep quickly. Kurt thought some tea might do them both some good, but the moment Rachel sat down to drink hers, she heard Beth making some noise from her room. When she walked into her room, Beth was whimpering and tossing in her bed, but it only lasted a few seconds. Rachel still waited around in case it happened again, but it seemed to have passed, so after about ten minutes, she figured it was safe to leave the room.

"Any idea what the nightmare was about?" Kurt asked.

"No," Rachel replied.

"Sometimes she talks in her sleep," Kurt remarked.

"I know." Rachel wrapped her hands around the mug and it had cooled considerably, but it still felt drinkable. "She didn't say anything this time, though." Rachel took a sip of her tea and noticed Kurt was staring at her. "What?"

Kurt shrugged. "Did you have fun today?"

"I did," Rachel replied. "It wasn't quite as fun as when I was a child, but it was fun nonetheless."

"And Quinn," Kurt said, raising his eyebrows.

"What about her?" Rachel asked.

"I was just wondering if you two are friends now," Kurt said, shrugging.

"I don't think friends is the right word," Rachel said, shaking her head.

"You two talked quite a bit," Kurt noted.

"Well, that's because Beth only wanted you to win her things and go on rides with her," Rachel said with a light laugh. "I definitely think you're her favorite."

"So, what is the right word?" Kurt asked.

Rachel frowned. "What?"

"You and Quinn," Kurt said, taking a drink of his tea.

"I don't know, Kurt," Rachel replied. "Is it important?"

"I was just curious," Kurt said.

"She's—" Rachel sighed and shrugged. "I don't know. Quinn seems like a nice person now, but I find it difficult to trust her. I don't know if this is all simply an act or if she's being sincere, but I don't want to risk falling for one of her tricks again. I will admit that it was nice getting to know her a little better. I'm fairly certain she spoke more to me today than all of high school combined, and there wasn't one insult thrown my way."

"Maybe she's changed," Kurt replied.

"Maybe," Rachel agreed. "Or maybe she's afraid I will no longer let her have any contact with Beth."

"Also a possibility," Kurt remarked.

"Considering she seemed to despise me in high school, I find it hard to believe that she would ever enjoy my company now," Rachel added. "Maybe she's simply tolerating me and choosing to stay quiet about her true feelings for the sake of being able to see Beth. It's okay, though; Quinn doesn't have to like me. As long as she's not openly hostile toward me like she was in school, everything will be fine."

"And if she is, would you stop her from seeing Beth?" Kurt asked.

Rachel sighed. "I do not know. I would like Beth to know her biological parents, but if Quinn reverted to her old ways, I don't know how I would feel about her being around Beth."

"I guess only time will tell," Kurt said.

"I want to believe her, but Quinn Fabray has never been the most trustworthy person," Rachel said. "She's always manipulated people to get what she wants."

"I know, sweetie," Kurt replied.

"It wouldn't be the first time she's used to me," Rachel added.

"I know," Kurt repeated.

"Or the first time that I thought there was a possibility of friendship only to have her laugh in my face," Rachel continued. "So, I guess I will be cautiously optimistic that she is being sincere until she either earns my trust or shows her true colors." Rachel sighed. "I think I'm going to go to bed."

"Do you work tomorrow?" Kurt asked.

"Yes, which means I need to be up in six hours," Rachel replied, standing up.

"If you hear Beth, don't worry," Kurt said, looking up at her. "I'll get up and make sure she's okay."

"Are you sure?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, you go get some sleep," Kurt replied.

"Thank you," Rachel said, leaning down, and kissing his cheek. "I don't know what I would do without you."

"Be even more tired?" Kurt joked.

Rachel laughed lightly. "Goodnight, Kurt."


	10. I Will Keep You Safe

**Chapter 10 – I Will Keep You Safe**

Rachel pulled her pillow closer and snuggled further into the covers. She wondered what time it was, but she didn't want to look at the clock. If she knew she had less than an hour's sleep left, she would never be able to fall back asleep since she was constantly looking to see how much time she had left.

She had almost drifted off back to sleep when her eyes flew open. She shifted her head, unburying her head from the covers so she could hear better, and then listened carefully. It took a minute or two, but she heard what sounded like a whimper. She threw off the covers, leapt out of bed, and padded across her room. When she walked into the living room, she could hear the sounds better. Beth was clearly crying, so she hurried across the living room and into the little girl's room. Beth was tossing in her bed, clearly having another nightmare, and Rachel walked over to her, shaking her.

"Beth, honey, wake up," Rachel said in a soothing voice. "Beth, wake up. It's just a nightmare; you're okay."

Beth finally stopped squirming and opened her eyes. There were tears streaming down her face as she launched herself into Rachel's arms. The brunette held her tightly, rocking her slightly, and running her hand through Beth's hair. The little girl held on tightly to Rachel as she continued to cry.

"You're okay," Rachel whispered. "It was only a bad dream. You're safe."

Kurt appeared in the doorway and Rachel looked up at him. This was the third time this week one of them woken up to Beth having a nightmare, and nothing they did seemed to be helping. They had put in a nightlight, hoping it would help if the room wasn't as dark, and that night they tried reading a book before bed in hopes that it would produce happy thoughts.

"Can you tell us what happened in the dream?" Rachel asked.

Rachel sat in on Beth's session with Dr. Gilmore the previous day and asked about the nightmares. The doctor said it was common in children that had been through a trauma like Beth had been and suggested Rachel try to get her to talk about them. If she wasn't willing to talk about them, the therapist also suggested getting her to draw about them since Beth seemed to like art.

"Do you remember what you were dreaming about?" Kurt asked when Beth didn't say anything.

"Kinda," Beth mumbled.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Rachel asked.

"It might make you feel better," Kurt added.

"It was dark," Beth finally said.

"And the dark was scary?" Rachel asked.

Beth nodded. "It was loud and I was stuck."

"Do you remember anything else?" Kurt asked.

"No," Beth said, shaking her head.

"Do you know where you were or what the sounds were?" Rachel asked.

Beth shook her head again and Rachel looked at Kurt. She wondered if he was thinking the same thing—if she was having nightmares about the car crash. She didn't want to her ask her in case that wasn't what she was dreaming about, not wanting to unnecessarily remind her of it.

"Everything is okay now," Rachel said, pulling her closer. "You're in your bed, safe at home. There's no need to be afraid now, okay?"

Beth nodded and Rachel held her in silence for a few minutes. She really didn't know what else to do in the situation other than try to let the little girl know she was safe. When she had nightmares as a child they usually involved monsters hiding in her room and her fathers would show her that there was nothing hiding in her closet or under her bed. Beth's nightmares were a little harder to dispel. She suspected Beth was dreaming of the car crash, but she had no way of knowing for sure, and even if Rachel did know that's what she was dreaming about, she didn't know how to make the nightmares go away. It was something that was very traumatic, and Rachel couldn't simply show her it wasn't real like her fathers did for her.

"Do you think you can go back to sleep?" Rachel asked.

Beth hesitated for a moment and then said, "Yeah."

"Will you be okay in here or would you like to come into one of our rooms?" Kurt asked.

Beth didn't answer; instead, she crawled out of Rachel's arms and into her bed. Kurt walked to the other side of the bed and the two of them tucked her in.

"Do you want a story?" Rachel asked.

Beth shook her head and closed her eyes. Considering she had been waking up so much in the middle of the night, Rachel figured she was probably exhausted. Sure enough, not long after closing her eyes, Beth's breathing evened out. Kurt and Rachel both stayed for several more minutes, making sure the little girl was really asleep; after a while, Rachel stood up, trying not to shake the bed. She looked down to make sure the movement didn't wake Beth, and when it was clear she was still sleeping, the two walked out of the room together.

"That's the third time this week," Kurt whispered once the curtain was closed.

Rachel sighed. "I know."

"Is it just me or do they seem to be getting worse?" Kurt asked.

"It's not just you," Rachel said, shaking her head. "I'll call Dr. Gilmore tomorrow and see if she can recommend anything else." Rachel covered her mouth as she yawned. "I'm going to try to get a bit more sleep. Hopefully she'll sleep through the rest of the night, but if she doesn't, I'll take care of her if you want to sleep."

"Goodnight," Kurt said through a yawn. "And don't for a second think I won't be in there with you. You're the one who has to get up early."

Rachel smiled. "I know, but the offer is there."

"I will see you in the morning," Kurt said, squeezing her hand as he walked by. "And hopefully not before then."

"Goodnight," Rachel said, heading back to her room.

* * *

"Shouldn't you be at work?" Kurt asked, stifling a yawn.

"I called in," Rachel said, rubbing her eye. "Jenny was nice enough to trade with me, so I'm working tomorrow instead of today."

Kurt walked into the kitchen and sat down at the small table. They had both slept a lot later than usual, but after Beth woke up a second time, Rachel couldn't seem to fall back asleep. So, when it came time for her to get up, she called her coworker on the off chance that she was up. Luckily for her, the other woman was awake, and after explaining what was going on, she agreed to trade days with her. Rachel was grateful her coworker was so understanding; she didn't want to lose the money by taking the day off, but she also was far too tired to go into work.

"Coffee?" Rachel asked, grabbing the pot the moment it was done brewing.

"Is that really a question?" Kurt asked. "Is Beth still sleeping?"

"Yes," Rachel said, grabbing two mugs. "I figured it would be best to let her sleep while she's actually sleeping and not having a nightmare."

"Have you called her therapist yet?" Kurt asked.

"No." She poured them both some coffee and walked to the table, putting one of the mugs in front of Kurt. "She comes in late on Tuesdays, so I'll have to make the call later. Unless you think we should try getting her to draw or paint about her dreams; we haven't done that yet."

"We could," Kurt said, taking a sip of his coffee.

Rachel sighed as she sat down. "I just wish I knew if we were doing the right thing."

"I know, sweetie," Kurt said, putting his hand over hers.

"I hate being uncertain about things," Rachel remarked. "I always know what I want, go after it, and don't let anything get in my way. From the time I was three and in dance class, I was determined to get the solos; it was around then when I decided I wanted to be on Broadway and nothing has stood in my way since. This is the first time in my life that I have felt so lost and unsure about something. I never know if we're doing the right thing and I don't like the feeling of helplessness that goes with it."

"Something tells me that is how all parents feel," Kurt replied. "You just have the added pressure of not choosing to be a parent, so you're coming into this in the middle of everything. We both are."

"I had a choice," Rachel said, shaking her head.

"Did you really?" Kurt asked. "I know you better than anyone, and I know you never would have said no. I think Shelby knew it, too. In theory you had a choice, but anyone who knows you well knows you really only had one option."

"I'm so afraid I'm going to mess everything up," Rachel replied. "I don't want to make everything worse."

"Don't be so hard on yourself." Kurt squeezed her hand. "You're doing the best you can."

Rachel sighed. Kurt was right; she knew she was being hard on herself, but she was used to being a perfectionist, and she knew she was far from doing a perfect job right now.

"I know," Rachel admitted. "You just know how much I hate not being in control; I find the whole situation frustrating because I don't know what to do most of the time."

"Do you regret your decision to be her guardian?" Kurt asked.

"Of course not!" Rachel immediately replied.

"Then that's all that matters," Kurt replied. "We'll figure everything else out along the way."

"I was actually thinking last night that it might be good to sign Beth up for a class," Rachel said. "You know, getting her interacting with other children and hopefully making some friends. School is still over two months away, and I think it would be good if she had people her own age that she could play with. I'm sure it would be much more fun for her than playing with either of us. Plus, taking dance and voice lessons was my favorite thing when I was little. Not that I made many friends doing it, but it was still fun."

"That's a good idea," Kurt replied. "I've read that interacting with children her own age is important."

"Where did you read that?" Rachel asked.

"I may have bought a book or two," Kurt shrugged, "and done some internet research."

Rachel smiled; Kurt wasn't a big reader, so she was surprised to hear he had been reading up on raising children. She often felt bad for dragging him into it—giving up his mornings to watch Beth, getting up in the middle of the night when she had nightmares—but he was clearly committed. She really couldn't imagine doing this by herself or doing it with anyone other than Kurt.

"So, you think signing her up for a class would be good?" Rachel asked.

"I think it's perfect," Kurt replied.

"Good," Rachel said, smiling again. "I will start looking into classes available and see if she's interested in any of them."

"You're not just going to sign her up for dance class?" Kurt asked, smirking.

"No," Rachel laughed, "I do think it should be her choice. Of course I hope she chooses something in the arts, but if not, that's okay too."

"With us raising her, Shelby being her mom, and Puck and Quinn being her biological parents, I have a feeling she will," Kurt said, laughing.

Rachel took one last drink of her coffee and stood up. "I should probably get ready for the day; since I'm not working, I think I will do some grocery shopping. The cabinets are looking a little bare."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Kurt asked.

"No, you take the day off," Rachel replied. "I'll take Beth with me, so you can have a few hours to yourself."

"More sleep," Kurt said, smiling. "Sounds good."

* * *

"Grape juice or apple juice?" Rachel asked.

"Apple," Beth replied.

Rachel grabbed the bottle, put it into her cart, and continued walking down the aisle. "You can pick one package of cookies, but no more than that."

Beth stood and looked at the shelves for a moment before reaching up and grabbing a package of Oreos. She then turned and put it into the cart while Rachel grabbed a more vegan friendly snack for herself. She looked at her list as they walked down the rest of the aisle, but it was mostly junk food, which was not on her shopping list. Somehow, though, they almost always managed to come home with ten things from the aisle that was not on the list.

"Pick a cereal," Rachel said, staring down the next aisle.

Beth walked ahead and Rachel grabbed a box of oatmeal since she was almost out. Beth came back with two boxes of cereal and Rachel was pleasantly surprised that neither of them were the sugary kind. Rolling her eyes, she grabbed some sugary, fake chocolate cereal that Kurt liked so much. She found it sad that a four year old had a more grown up taste in cereal than Kurt did.

They continued going down the aisles, getting things they needed and some they didn't, but Rachel still found it difficult to say no when Beth wanted something. She wanted Beth to eat healthy, but she didn't want to completely dictate what she ate just because she didn't believe in eating things that were not vegan friendly. Luckily Beth didn't ask for too much; they did get more junk food than when it was just her and Kurt, but it wasn't too excessive. She definitely saw a lot worse in other people's shopping carts as they walked by.

Rachel finally grabbed some bread for Kurt and Beth and then walked around to the section with fruits and vegetables. As she set a bag of oranges in the cart and began looking through the nectarines, her phone starting ringing in her purse. She figured it was Kurt telling her to get something while she was there, but when she pulled it out and looked at screen, Quinn's name was there instead.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Hey," Quinn said, sounding a bit muffled. "It's Quinn."

"Hello, Quinn," Rachel said with a light laugh.

"I don't know if you're working today or not, but I wanted to know if you three would like to get dinner later," Quinn said, sounding much clearer now. "Or maybe lunch if that's better."

"Oh," Rachel replied, surprising by the invitation. "Actually, I traded with someone, so I am off today. Beth and I were just doing some grocery shopping, but we're almost done. After dropping the groceries off at home, I was thinking about going out for lunch, so if you would like to meet us— "

"Yeah, that would be great," Quinn interrupted.

"Okay, so I will text you a place once I figure out where Beth would like to eat, okay?" Rachel said.

"Sounds good," Quinn replied. "I'll see you later."

"Goodbye," Rachel said before ending the call.

She had definitely not been expecting Quinn to call her so soon. It had only been three days since they were all at the carnival together; three days in which Rachel would think back to Quinn's words and mannerisms, trying to determine if Quinn was being sincere. Rachel liked to give people second chances, but this wasn't just Quinn's second chance; it was probably her fifth or sixth chance, so Rachel felt like she had the right to be wary.

"It looks like Quinn will be joining us for lunch," Rachel said. "Is that okay?"

Beth shrugged and didn't say anything, so Rachel took that as meaning she was okay with it. If she wasn't, Rachel would have called Quinn back to cancel, but Beth appeared to be indifferent about it.

"Is there anywhere in particular that you would like to eat?" Rachel asked.

"That place with the pizza sticks," Beth replied.

Rachel nodded and grabbed her phone to let Quinn know the place and a time she thought would be doable. They still needed to do the last bit of grocery shopping and get it back to the apartment, so she decided to give herself an hour and a half to do everything. Lunch would be a bit later than she generally ate, but she didn't want to tell Quinn a time and then be late. Instead of sending another text to Kurt, she figured it would be best if she called, so she hit her speed dial and listened to it ring.

"Hello," Kurt eventually said, sounding as if he was just sleeping.

"You're still in bed," Rachel said, laughing.

"Yes," Kurt said, and even though she couldn't see him, she would bet he just rolled his eyes at her.

"I'm almost done shopping and Quinn just called to ask if we all wanted to get lunch," Rachel said, putting some nectarines in a plastic bag. "Well, she asked about dinner, but I thought lunch might be better. Do you want to go? You don't have to, but she invited you as well."

"What time?" Kurt asked.

"I told her around one thirty," Rachel replied. "I thought that would give us enough time to get home, put up the groceries, and meet her. I know it would be cutting it kind of close for you to get to work, but I thought I would ask."

"I think I will pass on this one," Kurt said.

"I thought so," Rachel said, laughing lightly.

The two said their goodbyes and Rachel turned around to find a bag of apples, a carton of strawberries, and a bunch of bananas in the cart. Figuring that was enough fruit, she grabbed a few vegetables and then headed to the checkout to pay for everything.

* * *

For once, Rachel wasn't quite so nervous about meeting Quinn. She was still somewhat nervous, but she wasn't as panicked about what to wear or trying to think of all the ways the blonde could make her feel terrible about herself. Whether Quinn was actually nice or simply playing nice she didn't know, but either way, Rachel knew she didn't have to worry about the other woman being openly hostile toward her.

When they walked into the restaurant, Rachel looked around for Quinn. At first she didn't think the blonde was there yet—she and Beth were about fifteen minutes early—but then she spotted her near the back of the room. Quinn didn't look up as they approached; all her attention was focused on the book in front of her. Despite the fact that Quinn seemed to have changed, it was almost nice to see that this one thing didn't. She remembered seeing Quinn in the choir room many times with her face in a book.

"Good book?" Rachel asked.

Quinn looked up and smiled. "Not really, but also not terrible. It's one of the books being published with the company I'm working for. The author gave each of us a book in thanks."

"I just realized I've never asked what exactly you do there," Rachel remarked, pulling out a seat for Beth, and sitting down next to her.

"I mostly do whatever other people need me to do," Quinn said, shrugging. "There are two of us from NYU that are working there for the summer and we're sort of assistants for the full time employees."

"How many employees are there?" Rachel wondered.

"Only five." Quinn laughed lightly. "I told you, we're small."

"Is this the rest of your party?"

"Is Kurt coming," Quinn asked as Rachel looked over to find a waiter standing beside the table.

"No," Rachel replied.

"This is everyone," Quinn said to the waiter.

"Can I get you all something to drink?" the waiter asked.

"Do you want juice or water?" Rachel asked Beth.

"Water," the girl answered.

"Two waters," Rachel said, grabbing her menu to look at.

"Make that three," Quinn said.

"I will be right back with your drinks," the waiter said before walking away.

"So, Kurt didn't want to come?" Quinn said, grabbing one of the menus from the table.

"He goes into work at three, so it would have been cutting it very close," Rachel replied. "Otherwise, I'm sure he would have come."

Quinn nodded. "I figured it was because he doesn't like me."

"What?" Rachel asked, surprised by the comment. "Kurt likes you."

Quinn shook her head and smiled wryly.

"Okay, maybe like is too strong of a word," Rachel amended. "I wouldn't necessarily say he disliked you, though. He just—"

"Doesn't like me," Quinn interrupted.

"He's wary," Rachel replied.

Quinn shrugged. "It's okay. Honestly, I didn't think either of you would be as forgiving as you have been. Especially you." Quinn shook her head. "Not after the way I behaved toward you for so many years. I know you've talked about second chances before, but I think I used up my second and third chance by our sophomore year."

"You did," Rachel agreed.

Rachel didn't think there was any point in downplaying it. Quinn was horrible to her in high school and if it was anyone other than Rachel, they would have told Quinn to get lost—or possibly something much more colorful. Even though she sometimes wished she could do just that, Rachel knew it wasn't in her nature. Sometimes she felt like it made her a doormat—people would treat her badly, knowing they would be forgiven in the end—but she always wanted to believe the best in people. That didn't mean she had to act like it didn't happen or forgive people easily, though; not when they just came into her life after years of bullying and definitely not when Beth was now involved.

As much as she was worried about getting hurt herself, she was more worried about what could happen to Beth. She didn't want someone coming into the little girl's life just to leave. It was one of her biggest fears with Quinn; if she wasn't being sincere about all of this and it turned out to be one big joke—well, she didn't know what she would do.

"At least we're in agreement," Quinn said, smiling crookedly.

"Three waters," the waiter said, appearing again. "Are you ready to order or do you need more time?"

"I know what I want," Rachel said, looking at Quinn.

The three ordered and the waiter walked away again, leaving them in silence. Rachel poked at the lemon in the bottom of the glass with her straw while Beth began doodling on the back of the little coloring book they gave her.

"Do you have anything planned for the rest of the day?" Quinn asked after a few minutes.

"A nap would be nice," Rachel said, shrugging. "I also thought I would do a bit of research."

"Research?" Quinn asked.

Rachel glanced at Beth. "Kurt and I thought it might be nice to enroll Beth in a class of some kind if she wanted to join one, so I figure I should look into what is being offered."

"I'm a little surprised you didn't already sign her up for dance class," Quinn commented.

"Why does everyone assume I would sign her up for dance class?" Rachel huffed and then paused. "Please don't answer that."

"I like dancing," Beth quietly said.

"Well, I'm sure there are plenty of different classes to choose from," Rachel replied. "You will be able to pick whatever you want. Does that sound fun?"

"Yeah," Beth said, resuming her coloring.

"I'm sure it will be more fun than when I had to take piano lessons as a child," Quinn said, rolling her eyes. "My father figured if he was paying for lessons, I needed to be the best. I hated it. Once I quit, I didn't play for years; not until—" Quinn stopped and looked down.

Rachel knew what Quinn was going to say—not until their junior year when the two were trying to write an original song for Regionals. It was an unmitigated disaster to say the least and Rachel tried to not think about it.

"Well, hopefully Beth enjoys whatever she chooses more than you enjoyed piano lessons," Rachel said, taking a sip of water.

"I'm sure she will," Quinn replied.

Rachel could hear the sadness in Quinn's voice; she thought of asking the blonde about it, but something stopped her. Quinn always seemed like a very private person and she didn't want to ask her something that might provoke her. In high school, asking Quinn the wrong question was generally what brought on the worst moments for Rachel, and she didn't want to risk that happening right now.

Then again, maybe that wouldn't happen; maybe Quinn really had changed. Rachel wasn't willing to test it, though. Not right now—not while they were in public and certainly not with Beth there.

* * *

**Reviews are always appreciated.**


	11. Just the Three of Us

**Devin Jaste: I'll definitely get to all of that. It usually takes a while (at least several months) for everything to be settled as far as an inheritance goes. And as far as Rachel's feelings about losing Shelby…it'll definitely be addressed more.**

**Chapter 11 – Just the Three of Us**

"Which is yours?"

Rachel looked to her left, where a redheaded woman was standing. She looked like she was in her early to mid-forties and Rachel instantly guessed she was a real estate agent or lawyer by her appearance.

"The blonde on the far right," Rachel replied.

"Oh," the woman said, looking Rachel up and down.

Rachel instantly felt like the woman was judging her. It was obvious by her question that she assumed Rachel had a child in the class and she knew the other woman was most likely trying to figure out how old she would have been at the time of Beth's birth. Rachel felt herself instantly going on the defensive under this woman's gaze.

The woman crossed her arms. "How old is she?"

"Four," Rachel replied.

"So is my daughter, Samantha." The woman pointed out a little girl with red hair. "You two are new here, right? I don't believe I've seen either of you around before."

"This is her first class," Rachel replied.

"I thought so," the woman said, eying her. "I generally remember faces."

Rachel wondered how much time was left before the class was over. She didn't want to be rude and just walk away, but this woman was rubbing her the wrong way. Just as she thought about feigning a phone call to be able to excuse herself, the woman looked at her watch and cleared her throat.

"Well, I hope to see you again next week, but I must be going," the woman said and then walked to the other side of the room.

"I bet," Rachel mumbled.

"Ignore her."

Rachel jumped at the sound of the voice and looked over her shoulder to find another woman standing just behind her. This one was much younger—Rachel would guess she was only a few years older than her—and sort of reminded her a bit of Brittany. She was tall, blonde, and had some of the bluest eyes Rachel had ever seen.

"That's Sheila," the woman continued. "She likes to get to know the new parents so she doesn't have to waste any time judging them." The woman gave her a knowing smile. "I'm Zoe."

"I'm Rachel," she introduced herself.

"Your daughter's pretty good for her first time here," Zoe commented.

"Sister," Rachel corrected.

Zoe nodded. "I think she has a natural talent for it."

"I'm not surprised," Rachel said, smiling as she looked at Beth. "She's been raised around music and dance her whole life."

Rachel watched as the dance teacher gathered the students up. Class was clearly ending and Rachel was a little relieved because Sheila kept looking at her from the other side of the room. There were two other women flanking her, and Rachel knew she was the topic of conversation.

"Are they always like this?" Rachel asked.

Zoe followed Rachel's gaze and rolled her eyes. "Every time; apparently even forty year old women can still be stuck in high school. They try to know everything about everyone. My advice? Ignore them. It will drive them crazy if they have nothing to gossip about."

Rachel laughed. "That shouldn't be a problem."

She was used to dealing with people like them. She did go McKinley High, after all, and NYADA really wasn't much different. She had spent her whole life having people talk about her—growing up in a small town with two fathers didn't exactly make her invisible—so this was nothing new to her.

"Class should be over in about five minutes," Zoe informed her. "Mrs. Lewis usually gives them this time at the end of class to talk to each other."

Rachel nodded. Some of her dance teachers used to do the same thing; it was always her least favorite part because none of the other students would ever talk to her. When she looked at Beth, the little girl was standing off to the side much like Rachel used to do.

"Did you see what I did?" a little girl came up and asked Zoe.

"I did!" Zoe enthusiastically replied before whispering something into the girl's ear.

"That's my daughter, Emma," Zoe said as the little girl walked over to Beth.

"She looks just like you," Rachel commented.

"She may look like me, but she sure has her father's personality," Zoe replied.

As Rachel watched Beth and Emma, she realized she really didn't know what else to say. When she met new people before, she would generally start talking about NYADA and her dreams of being on Broadway, but since getting Beth, things had changed a bit for her. She still wanted those same things, but she guessed her priorities were slightly different now. Luckily she was saved by her phone buzzing in her hand, and she looked down to see that Kurt was calling.

"Hello," she said upon answering it.

"Hey, I forgot to tell you earlier that I'm going to be home a little late," Kurt said. "My boss wants to talk to me about something and I didn't want you worried that I got mugged on the subway or something."

Rachel laughed lightly, remembering the time she really did think that. "Well, thank you for letting me know, and I will see you when you get home."

"You better still be up because I want to know all the details about Beth's class," Kurt remarked.

"Oh," Rachel glanced at Sheila and her friends, "I definitely will. Bye, Kurt."

As she ended the call, Beth walked over to her with Emma trailing behind. Beth was actually smiling, which made Rachel think she did the right thing by signing her up for the class.

"Did you have fun?" Rachel asked; Beth didn't say anything, but she nodded. "Would you like to get some ice cream and go watch the ducks?"

"Yeah," Beth said, reaching out for Rachel's hand.

Rachel looked up at Zoe and gave her a smile. "It was very nice to meet you."

"I guess we'll be seeing you two again next week," Zoe said, smiling back.

"It appears so," Rachel said, smiling down at Beth.

* * *

Rachel heard the sound of Kurt's keys jingling in the hall as she walked into the living room with her tea. When Kurt walked in he looked harried; his hair was slightly mussed and his tie was hanging loosely around his neck. Without saying a word, he walked over to the couch and plopped down next to her, putting his feet on the coffee table.

"Long day?" Rachel guessed.

"Birthday party," Kurt replied. "I had to listen to twenty-two six year olds running around, screaming for three hours. I will never understand parents who just sit there and watch their kid knock over a table."

"Are you serious?" Rachel asked.

Kurt nodded. "She didn't even apologize to Jimmy, who it fell on by the way, and then she tried to tell us that it wouldn't have happened if the table wasn't in such a strange location. I had to stop myself from telling her that it wouldn't have happened if she hadn't taught her son to be spoiled brat." Kurt rolled his eyes. "On the up side, I got a raise and my boss wanted to talk to me about temporarily taking over Laura's position while she's on maternity leave. He says it will be a trail run to see how I do managing others."

"That's wonderful!" Rachel said, smiling as she sipped her tea.

"Enough about my day," Kurt pulled his tie off and threw it onto the table, "I want to hear all about dance class."

"She didn't do a lot of actual dancing; she stood back a lot and watched in the beginning," Rachel replied. "She did start participating more toward the end and she definitely seems to have a natural talent for it. Another student's mother even commented on it. Beth seemed as if she enjoyed it and already said she would like to go back next week."

"Well, that's good, right?" Kurt asked. "Why do you look disappointed by it?"

Rachel shook her head. "I'm not; I'm very happy that she wants to go back."

Kurt's eyebrows rose. "But?"

"But there are these mothers," Rachel continued. "One of them walked up to me and started asking questions. It was nothing out of the ordinary, but I could tell she was judging me. It wasn't _what_ she said, but _how_ she said it. She thought I was Beth's mother and clearly did not approve of me."

"So there's a bunch of snobs there?" Kurt asked.

"Yes, although there was one there that was nice," Rachel replied. "She was young, too, so she probably gets the same thing from them. At the end she got her daughter to talk to Beth while they had some free time, which I thought was nice of her."

Kurt smirked. "I think I'll ask for next Friday off. If they disapprove of you, they are really going to disapprove of me."

"I have a feeling they disapprove of everyone," Rachel remarked. "I've dealt with close-minded people like them my whole life. There were parents like them in my dance classes when I was a child. They would never let their kids speak to me; at first I didn't understand why, so my fathers had to explain to me that some people don't like families that they think are different. It was in dance class that I first experienced that prejudice, and I went back to class determined to show them that my family was just as good as theirs."

"What did you do?" Kurt asked.

"I made a presentation on poster board and took it to class," Rachel said, laughing at herself. "I'm sure I would have made a PowerPoint presentation if I had discovered its existence at that time. Needless to say, it did not go over very well. One of the boys in class ripped it in half and I cried the rest of the class and the whole car ride home."

It was one of Rachel's earliest memories and she could still remember it very well. Before that time, she never saw her family as being different than any other and she didn't understand how anyone else could feel that her family was wrong or somehow less good than theirs. She idolized her fathers and couldn't fathom anyone thinking they should be parents. It was her first encounter with bigoted people and it left her shaken. She was an optimistic four year old and it was the first time she realized not everyone was nice and, as Leroy told her at the time, some people would automatically not like her because of who she was and how she grew up. Before that time, her fathers had managed to shield her from the hate.

"Well, I'm definitely coming with you next Friday and if they're bitchy to me, I'll be bitchy right back," Kurt replied. "You know, when Beth isn't around."

"Yes, we wouldn't want her picking up on any less than desirable behaviors," Rachel said.

Kurt looked toward Beth's bedroom. "She hadn't had any nightmares tonight, has she?"

"No." Rachel shook her head. "I thought I heard her say something in her sleep, but when I went in to check on her, she seemed fine."

Rachel knew it would probably happen sometime over the course of the night, but she was trying to stay optimistic that the nightmares would eventually pass. They were doing everything Beth's therapies had suggested, but nothing appeared to be helping with them. She hated seeing Beth so scared after waking up from them; it made Rachel feel helpless because there wasn't a lot she could do about it. She couldn't seem to do anything to prevent them, so all she could do was be there for Beth and assure her that everything was okay.

"Maybe she'll make it through the night without waking up," Kurt said with a sigh.

"We can hope," Rachel replied.

"Hey, I was thinking we should do something tomorrow," Kurt said, turning his head to look at her. "It's Saturday and we're both off work, and I thought we could show Beth around the city a bit. We've talked about it several times, but we've never actually gone."

"That would be perfect," Rachel replied since she had been thinking along the same lines.

She had been wanting to show Beth some of the sights for quite some time, but one of them was usually working, and she wanted the three of them to go together. Beth would probably be growing up in the city and Rachel wanted to be the one to show it to her.

"Glad we're in agreement," Kurt replied.

"Aren't we usually?" Rachel asked.

"Usually." Kurt smiled at her. "Now, I'm going to go get my beauty sleep, so I can function properly tomorrow."

Rachel laughed. "Me too; I was only still up because I knew you would wake me up to hear about Beth's class."

"You know me too well," Kurt said with a smirk.

* * *

Rachel carefully watched Beth as she stood a few feet away. Kurt had surprised the little girl with her very own camera, and she had been learning to take pictures with. Rachel was a little concerned she was going to drop it, which was one of the reasons she was watching her so closely. The other was because they were in Times Square and she wasn't going to risk Beth getting lost—or worse—just because she averted her gaze for two seconds. She didn't like letting go of Beth's hand while they were there, but if she didn't, it would make it a bit hard for her to take pictures.

"She looks happy," Kurt said.

"She does," Rachel agreed. "But I still can't believe you bought a four year old an expensive digital camera. It's nicer than mine!"

Kurt laughed. "You're just annoyed you didn't think of it first."

Rachel huffed. "Yes, I am."

She glanced at Kurt and wanted to laugh. Before they came to Times Square, they took the ferry to the Statue of Liberty. After spending several hours there, Beth wanted to go to Central Park, where they spend a considerable amount of time before eventually making their way to their current location. Along the way, Beth saw a vendor with one of the Statue of Liberty foam crowns, but instead of wearing it herself, she wanted Kurt to put it on. Kurt had been wearing it for several hours and Rachel was fairly certain he had forgotten he had it atop his head.

"I think we're going to have to take Beth to a Broadway show soon," Rachel said, watching Beth take in everything around her. "It would be a shame not to introduce her to the world of musical theater at a young age."

"We watched The Wizard of Oz the other day while—"

Rachel gasped. "Without me?"

Kurt rolled his eyes. "As if you haven't seen it a hundred times."

"That's not the point," Rachel said, huffing.

"As I was going to say before I was interrupted by your dramatics," Kurt gave her a pointed look and she rolled her eyes at him, "we watched The Wizard of Oz the other day and she really liked it, so maybe she would enjoy Wicked."

"I don't know." Rachel frowned, trying to figure out if it was age appropriate. "Those flying monkeys in the show are a little scary and the last thing I would want to do is make her nightmares even worse."

"They're not _that_ bad," Kurt replied. "Just because _you_ had nightmares about them doesn't mean she will."

"I'm simply saying there are other shows that are aimed a little more toward children," Rachel replied.

Kurt sighed. "Fine."

"Did you get some good pictures?" Rachel asked when Beth walked toward them.

"Yeah," Beth replied, holding up the camera for Rachel to look at.

"These are really good," Rachel said as she flipped through the pictures, and she meant it. "I really like the one of Kurt in his crown."

She held the camera to show him and he narrowed his eyes but didn't take off the foam crown. Rachel laughed lightly as she handed the camera back to Beth and asked, "Are you ready to go or do you want to stay a bit more?"

"We can go," Beth said as she reached up and took Rachel's hand.

"I think we should get something to eat," Kurt said. "It is after six."

Rachel nodded. "Do you want to eat out or get some takeout and go home?"

"It's up to you," Kurt said, shrugging.

"Beth?" Rachel asked, but she just shrugged as well. "Okay, I guess we'll pick something up to take home."

"It had been a long day with a lot of walking she was eager to get home and relax. The day had been fun—she loved to go out and spend the day with Kurt and Beth—but it was also exhausting, and she would love nothing more than to prop her feet up and unwind by watching a movie.

"Can we get Chinese?" Kurt asked.

"I would rather Italian or maybe something from that little sandwich shop," Rachel replied.

They paused and then both looked down at Beth; she looked up, glancing back and for between them. "I like Chinese."

"I win," Kurt said, smirking.

"Are you two always going to outvote me?" Rachel asked, playfully nudging Beth. "You're supposed to be on my side."

"Well, she's not," Kurt remarked with his smirk still firmly on his face.

Rachel rolled her eyes. "That's only because you bribe her with things like digital cameras."

Kurt hummed. "Yes, but I still win."

Beth laughed and squeezed Rachel's hand. Rachel gave hers a squeeze back as she smiled down at her. Today had definitely been a good day for them. She was fairly certain Beth had smiled more over the course of the day than she had ever seen before. Rachel had been thinking about their next outing and she already knew she wanted to take Beth to the zoo. It was something they thought about doing that day, but it was ultimately decided that they should have an entire day just devoted to it. As much as Beth loved watching the ducks, Rachel figured the zoo would be the perfect thing for her.

"Have you spoken to Quinn lately?"

Rachel looked at Kurt, wondering why he was suddenly bringing her up. "No, not since we had lunch. Why?"

Kurt shrugged. "I was just curious; I saw a girl with pink hair back there and it reminded me of a certain ill-fated phase."

Rachel had actually been wondering why Quinn had not contacted her lately. The last time she spoke to her was when they had lunch together, but that was nearly two weeks ago. She was a little surprised by it, but Rachel assumed she must be busy with work. Or possibly that Quinn wasn't really ready to see Beth like she thought.

In the times that Quinn had been around, she never really interacted with the little girl. Rachel noticed it quite quickly, but she never brought it up. She always just figured Quinn was trying to ease herself into Beth's life—or maybe ease Beth into her life—which Rachel could understand. It must be hard suddenly coming face to face with the daughter you gave up. Rachel felt similar when she first met Shelby; as much as she thought of that moment, when it actually happened, she was left not knowing what to say. Even though Quinn didn't a say a lot to Beth, though, Rachel did notice the blonde watching the girl. It was also something she had always noticed about Quinn during high school; she would often see Quinn sitting back and observing people. Rachel always had the feeling it was how Quinn learned about people, though in high school it was probably so she could learn their weaknesses and use it against them.

"She's probably busy with work," Rachel finally said after a few moments.

Now that Kurt had brought it up, Rachel thought about calling her later, but she quickly nixed that idea. This was Quinn Fabray after all, and if she wasn't getting in touch, there was probably a reason for it. Calling her would probably only result in a less than desirable interaction with the other woman.

* * *

By the time they walked into the apartment, Beth was fast asleep in Kurt's arms. She fell asleep some time on the ride home, so Kurt carried her from the subway to their apartment. He wasn't the most muscular guy in the world, and when they walked into the apartment, Rachel could see the perspiration on his forehead from his struggle to carry her.

"Thank god," Kurt said, sagging against the door.

"I thought you didn't believe in god," Rachel replied.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "It's just an expression."

"Do you think we should let her nap for a little while longer?" Rachel asked as she put the bags of takeout food onto the table.

"I don't think we could wake her if we tried," Kurt said, shifting her more to his left arm.

"Okay, put her to bed and we'll let her sleep for thirty more minutes," Rachel instructed.

She knew it was a bad time to let her take a nap—her bedtime was just in a few hours—but she was clearly exhausted, which Rachel could sympathize with. Kurt seemed hesitant but nodded, and Rachel pulled out the cartons of Chinese food as he took Beth to her room. She grabbed three plates, setting one aside for Beth once she woke up, and set the other two on the table. She was just dumping the content of the cartons on the plates when Kurt walked back into the room.

"She's out like a light," Kurt announced. "She didn't even stir when I put her in her bed."

"Well, it has been a long day," Rachel said, walking over, and grabbing forks for them since neither had quite mastered the use of chopsticks.

"Thank you," Kurt said as he grabbed his plate. "Movie?"

"Please," Rachel replied, picking up her plate, and following Kurt into the living room.

Rachel sat down on the couch, throwing her shoes under the coffee table, and curling her legs underneath her. Kurt grabbed the remote control, turning on the television, and then handing it to Rachel.

"You pick," Kurt said.

Rachel didn't really care, so she chose the first movie that caught her eye—Never Been Kissed, one of her favorite 90's movies—and then took a bit of her food. As much as Rachel used to love going out and walking around the city, she almost preferred doing this. With work and Beth, she was usually too tired to do much else. Taking care of a four year old was a lot of work; she never once regretted becoming Beth's guardian, but she did sometimes miss having the freedom that she once had and the lack of responsibilities.

She had been putting off getting a second job because she knew school would be starting before she knew it and she wanted to enjoy what free time she had now. It was going to be a struggle to juggle everything once her classes started back, but she was trying to think positively about it. Since Broadway was her dream, giving up NYADA was not an option, and there was no way she would give up Beth, so she had no other option but to make everything work.

"Is there something wrong with your food?" Kurt asked.

Rachel looked at him. "What?"

"You've been staring at it for five minutes," Kurt stated.

"Oh," Rachel said, shaking her head. "No, the food is fine. I was just thinking."

"About what?" Kurt prodded.

Rachel sighed. "Everything."

"You're going to have to elaborate a little more, sweetie," Kurt replied.

"I suppose I get a bit overwhelmed sometimes when I think of classes resuming," Rachel admitted. "I know I shouldn't complain—a lot of people have lives that are much harder than mine—but I just keep wondering if I'm going to be able to do it all. Being in school was difficult enough sometimes, but now I have Beth and work." She sighed again. "I'm afraid I'm going to mess everything up."

"You're Rachel Berry," Kurt stated. "If anyone can do it, you can." He paused, smirking. "Plus, you have some fabulous help."

Rachel couldn't help but laugh. "For which I am forever grateful.

"You better be," Kurt said, nudging his shoulder into hers. "And I know what you mean; you've taken on a lot of responsibility. Anyone would feel overwhelmed in your situation. I worry, too."

"You do?" Rachel asked.

"Of course," Kurt replied. "I would be more concerned if we weren't worried."

"Yeah," Rachel agreed.

Rachel was just thankful Beth would be starting kindergarten in the fall. She was a bit on the young side for it, but she learned that Shelby had her tested just before the accident, and she had been shown to be ready for it. Among other things, she was reading at a much high level than other children her age and appeared to have a natural talent for numbers. So, even though she would be a year younger than a lot of the children, she would be starting with them. It was apparent that Beth had gotten Quinn's intelligence.

Her going to kindergarten was definitely going to make it easier on Kurt and Rachel. Beth would be in school at the same time they were, so they wouldn't have to hire someone to watch her during the day. Kurt would then work evenings while Rachel was home with Beth, and she had already talked to her manager about working Tuesday and Thursday mornings, which she had off, and weekends.

Rachel saw movement out of the corner of her eyes and looked over to find Beth standing in the entryway to her bedroom. She was rubbing her eyes, and Rachel wondered for a moment if she'd had a nightmare, but the little girl generally called out when she had them and Rachel hadn't heard her make a sound.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked, setting her plate on the table as she stood up.

Beth nodded and walked over to them; Kurt scooted over and she climbed on the couch, sitting in the space between them.

"Are you hungry?" Rachel asked.

Beth nodded again as she rested her head on Kurt's arm. She was clearly still half asleep and Rachel had to smile at the sight. Kurt looked up at her, returning her smile, as Beth closed her eyes. Rachel didn't know if she would be able to stay awake long enough to eat, but she went into the kitchen nevertheless. When she returned with the plate, she gently shook Beth, but the little girl didn't stir, so Rachel set the plate on the table with a light laugh.

"Someone's tired," Rachel said, sitting back down.

"Just a little," Kurt said as he smiled fondly at Beth.

When Rachel grabbed her plate and leaned back on the couch, Beth shifted between them, turning so her head was in Rachel's lap. It didn't make it easy to eat, but Rachel didn't try to move Beth. Instead, she picked up one of the blankets from the back of the couch and threw it over her. Rachel knew she was going to regret it when Beth woke up early from going to sleep well before her normal bedtime, but she just didn't have the heart to wake her when she looked so peaceful.


	12. Saturday Night

**Jules-Day: You'll definitely be seeing more of Zoe, Emma, and dance class.**

* * *

**Chapter 12 – Saturday Night**

Rachel looked at the clock; she only had forty-six minutes left of work, but time seemed to be standing still. It was one of those rare times of the day when the coffee shop was virtually empty. She much preferred the hectic pace that normally came with working as a barista because time usually passed quickly, and before she knew it, it would be time for her to go home. This afternoon, however, seemed to be an entirely different matter.

"I think you have an admirer."

Rachel looked at her coworker, April, and then followed her gaze. There was a man sitting near the window, who did appear to be looking at her. Rachel looked back at April and rolled her eyes at the other woman's cocked eyebrow and smirk.

"He's probably just looking at the menu," Rachel remarked.

"I don't think so," April replied. "He's been staring at you for the last twenty minutes.

Rachel snuck a glance at the man, and just as she looked his way, he looked back at the book he was reading. He was definitely her type with his dark hair, dark eyes, and strong jawline. She had to admit he was good looking even though he was slightly on the preppy side compared to the guys she had dated in the past.

"Do I sense interest on your part?" April asked, wrapping her arm around Rachel's shoulders.

"You know I don't have time to think of frivolous things like dating," Rachel stated, shrugging her off.

"You're nineteen," April replied.

"Yes, I'm nineteen, but I do have a child that I have to worry about," Rachel argued.

Not only would she feel guilty about leaving Beth for the evening to go out, but she also didn't know how men would react to the little girl. Dating had always been a challenge for her—she wasn't typically pretty and guys didn't generally seem interested—but Beth brought on a whole other set of challenges. For all intents and purposes, she had a daughter. She didn't know if this was something she should bring up quickly with potential boyfriends or if it was something she should keep to herself for a while. Beth was such a large part of her life now, though, and not bringing her up would feel like a lie to Rachel.

April sighed. "I just think you deserve to have some fun."

"I do have fun," Rachel replied with a frown.

"Yeah, for a fifty year old," April retorted.

She really couldn't argue. She had heard the same thing from Kurt many times, way before Beth ever came into their lives. During high school, she only attended one party, which she threw in an ill-fated attempt to become more popular and get Finn back after he dumped her for the second time. Or maybe it was the third time—she really couldn't remember at this point. The party only resulted in tears and her becoming even more ostracized than before. She was a little more active the past two years, going to parties or bars with friends. Kurt would still sometimes tease her about coming home so early, but she _had_ learned how to go out and have a good time.

"You know it's not so simple for me," Rachel replied. "Kurt works most evenings and I can't ask him to take off or watch her on his night off. He already does so much and it just wouldn't be fair. Besides, nothing says that guy is actually interested in me, so I don't know why we are having this conversation."

"Maybe not, but I think you're about to find out," April rushed out in a harsh whisper.

"Excuse me." Rachel's eyes widened and she turned around to find the guy on the other side of the register.

"What can I get you?" Rachel asked.

"Actually, I know you probably get this a lot, but I wanted to know if you would be interested in going on a date," the guys said, flashing his perfect smile.

"Told you," April mumbled as she walked past Rachel.

"I'm Ben, by the way," he said. "I've been in here a few times, and I guess I finally got the courage to come up here."

"I'm Rachel," she said, looking down.

"So, are you by any chance free on Saturday night?" he asked. "I don't know if you like poetry, but there's this reading a few of my friends are involved with."

"I—" Rachel took a deep breath. She really didn't want to turn him down; he seemed like a sweet guy and he looked so hopeful. "It's not really a good time right now. There's just a lot going on in my life."

His face fell a little as he nodded. "You can't blame a guy for trying." He gave her a small smile as he reached into his messenger bag and pulled out a piece of paper and a pen. "If you change your mind or ever decide that it is a good time, give me a call."

He handed the paper over with his phone number at the top; it was a flyer for the poetry reading. She nodded as she looked up, giving him a smile, which he returned. Without saying anything else, he turned and left the coffee shop.

"What is wrong with you?" April hissed. "That man was gorgeous."

Rachel certainly couldn't deny it. "I told you, I have other things to worry about than dating."

"For him, I would have found a babysitter," April said, shaking her head.

Rachel sighed and then looked at the clock and groaned when she saw that she still had thirty-eight minutes left of work.

* * *

As Rachel slid the door closed behind her, her nose was immediately hit with the delicious smell of fresh baked cookies. She was a little surprised that the smell was inside her apartment—Kurt didn't usually bake—but someone had definitely been baking cookies. When she walked toward the kitchen, Kurt was sitting at the table and, sure enough, there were chocolate chip cookies sitting on a plate next to him.

"You've been busy," Rachel said, looking around.

"Beth's idea," Kurt replied.

"Where is she?" Rachel asked.

"Taking a nap," Kurt said, holding out the plate of cookies. "Want one? We followed your recipe."

Rachel selected one from the plate and sat down. "Thank you."

"How was work?" Kurt inquired.

"Slow," Rachel said as she broke the cookie in half; it was still a bit warm, just the way she liked it. "At least the last hour and half was. Evidently no one felt the need for coffee this afternoon. I didn't think my shift was ever going to end, and to make matters worse, April was being her usual self today."

Kurt laugh. "What was she doing this time?"

"A guy came in today and asked me out," Rachel replied, trying to sound nonchalant about it. "Of course I said no and she spent the last half hour asking me why I turned him down when she knows perfectly well why."

"Was he ugly?" Kurt asked.

"No, he was very good looking," Rachel conceded.

"Did he have a mullet?" Kurt asked.

Rachel shook her head. "He had very nice hair."

"Did he have bad body odor?" Kurt asked. "Was he wearing a tracksuit? A shirt declaring his support for a republican candidate? Was he shorter than you?"

"No—"

"So, what was wrong with him?" Kurt interrupted.

Rachel huffed. "There was nothing wrong with him.

"Then why did you say no?" Kurt asked, raising his eyebrows at her.

"You know why," Rachel stated dryly.

Kurt tilted his head as he looked at her. "Sweetie, you are allowed to go out and have a life, you know."

"I already feel like I don't spend enough time with Beth," Rachel said.

You are home with her every evening and in the morning three or four times a week," Kurt argued. "You spend more time with her than most parents spend with their children; there is nothing to feel guilty about."

"Fine, but it wouldn't be fair to ask you to give up your Saturday," Rachel stated. "You didn't ask for any of this, but have been so wonderful, and I'm not going to let you give up your night just so I can go on some date."

"Why not?" Kurt asked. "One of us should have some fun, and I don't think I'm about to be asked out this weekend. I'm sure I'll be here with Beth anyway, so it really makes no difference to me. Plus, you're not asking me to give up my Saturday; I'm telling you to go."

Rachel sighed. "I suppose I could call him; he did give me his number in case I changed my mind."

"Wonderful," Kurt said as he leaned forward and rested his chin on his hand. "Now, tell me about the guy!"

As she looked at Kurt, she wondered how she got so lucky. She hadn't had many friends during her life, so she knew how special it was to find someone like him. Though things started out rocky, now she couldn't imagine her life without him. She didn't know how many friends would do as much as he had done in the past few months. Now, he was even giving up his Saturday night so she could go on a date. It made her feel guilty and like she was being a terrible friend to him. As she said to him, he didn't ask for any of this. She was the one that decided to be Beth's guardian, not him. Sometimes she wondered if he would get tired of all this one day and move out. She really wouldn't blame him if he did; this was a lot to take on for anyone, especially someone as young as they were and was pulled into it without much of a choice.

"Thank you, Kurt," she said, looking away when she felt the first hint of tears coming to her eyes.

Kurt waved her off. "I want to hear about the guy."

"Okay," Rachel relented with a light laugh as she composed herself. "He was—cute. He looked a bit like that guy in the new version of Much Ado About Nothing that we saw last summer."

"The main guy, the uncle, or the lovesick guy?" Kurt asked.

"The conniving guy," Rachel replied.

Kurt nodded his approval. "What was he wearing?"

Rachel laughed; it was always one of the first questions he asked. "He was kind of like a cross between—" she hesitated.

"A cross between who?" Kurt asked.

Blaine and Mr. Schue," Rachel finished.

"Oh," Kurt replied.

She hated bringing up his ex-boyfriend and wished she had thought of a different example. Blaine was someone they rarely talked about, and even after a year and a half, it was still a sore subject. Blaine broke his heart when he cheated on Kurt, and it took him a long time to get over it. Sometimes she wondered if he even was over it. They had reconciled briefly the previous year, but Kurt could never move past the cheating and things ended pretty quickly.

"At least he sounds well dressed," Kurt said after a moment of silence.

"He asked me to a poetry reading," Rachel added.

"So he's cultured, too," Kurt replied. "He already sounds much better than a certain past boyfriend of yours."

She didn't have any doubt who Kurt was talking about as she said, "He wasn't _that_ bad."

"I love my dear stepbrother, but no matter how many times I tried to tell him bowling and Breadstix was a terrible idea for a date, he just wouldn't listen." Kurt sighed. "He was always such a typical teenage boy."

"I can't argue with that," Rachel replied.

"You should definitely tell this guy to meet you here," Kurt stated. "I want to meet him and make sure he's good enough for you."

"His name is Ben," Rachel informed Kurt. "And I think if he still wants to go on a date, I will meet him there. I appreciate the sentiment of wanting to meet him, but I simply think it would be easier."

"Are you going to tell him about Beth?" Kurt asked.

"I don't know," Rachel admitted. "I don't really know the proper protocol for it. I will obviously have to tell him if we went out again because he would need to know what he's getting into if he were to want to see me again. If it comes up, I don't want to lie, but it's not exactly first date conversation." Rachel sighed. "I think I'm getting ahead of myself; I don't even know if he will still want to go out Saturday. He may have already asked another girl out who said yes."

"There is a way to find out," Kurt stated.

Rachel looked at her phone for a moment and then looked at Kurt again. "I'll call him later this evening."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Why not now?"

"I'm eating a cookie now," Rachel said, taking a large bite to prove her point.

"That is the lamest excuse I have ever heard from you, and that is saying a lot," Kurt said, shaking his head. "You better call him or I will do it for you."

"I will," Rachel replied.

"Now, it's time to get ready for work," Kurt said as he stood up. "Maybe a cute guy will ask me out, too. And at least I will have the decency to accept."

Rachel wanted to throw the rest of her cookie at him, but it was far too good to waste. Instead, she settled for glaring at him, but he only laughed and kissed the side of her head.

* * *

Rachel nervously looked around for Ben as she stood in front of the small bookstore she was supposed to meet him at. It wouldn't be hard to miss him since it wasn't overly crowded, so she assumed he wasn't there yet. She was a bit early, after all. Part of her wondered if he was going to show up—the nerves she had been feeling all week about this date were getting even more intense—but then she saw him as he was crossing the street.

"I'm not late, am I?" he asked, looking down at his watch.

"No, I'm early," Rachel said, smiling at him. "Being a performer, I'm habitually early to things."

"You wouldn't want to be late for an audition," he replied.

"Exactly!" Rachel brightly said, happy he understood.

"Are you an actress?" he asked as he held the door to the bookstore open for her.

"Actress, singer, dancer," she replied. "It had been my dream since I was three to be on Broadway. I'm studying musical theater at NYADA."

"Are you from the city?" he asked.

Rachel laughed lightly. "No, I grew up in Ohio. Coming to New York City was another dream of mine; that one came true and I am confident that my dreams of performing on a Broadway stage will also come true."

He put his hand on the small of her back as he said, "I think there's some empty seats over there."

Rachel nodded and followed his direction to some seats near the side of the room. It was a little far from the small stage, but at least they would have a fairly unobstructed view.

"So, are you attending school?" Rachel wondered.

"I go to Columbia," Ben said, sitting down after she was seated. "I'm premed; next year will be my last as an undergrad."

"Wow, that's amazing" Rachel said, impressed. "Are you from here originally or did you come for school?"

"I'm from Pennsylvania," Ben answered. "A pretty small town just over the West Virginia border."

"So you know what it's like to go from a small town to New York City," Rachel commented.

Ben laughed. "All too well. My first month here was terrible. I got lost countless times on the subway, I foolishly bought some concert tickets that turned out to be fake, and while I was moving into my dorm, someone made off with half my stuff. Where I grew up, people didn't even lock their door half the time; here, I have four locks on my apartment and I still get a little paranoid."

"I guess I should consider myself lucky," Rachel replied. "At least I was never robbed. I did buy tickets to a musical that was no longer running, but that happened while my high school glee club was here for the National Show Choir Competition."

"You were in Glee Club?" he asked.

Rachel hummed. "Yes, and we were quite good if I do say so myself. We lost that year, but we took first place the next year. Unfortunately McKinley High has never been able to repeat that win since many of us graduated."

"Glee wasn't really a thing at my high school," Ben stated. "I think we might've had a choir or something, but most people were into sports."

"Oh, it wasn't really the popular thing to do at my high school, but other than the cheerleaders, we were the only ones to bring home a national championship trophy in years," Rachel explained.

"Were you a cheerleader?" Ben asked.

Rachel laughed louder than she intended as she shook her head. "No. I wasn't very popular; I think a lot of people didn't understand my ambition and mistook it for something else. I'm fairly certain if I tried to join the Cheerios I would have either been laughed out of Lima or one of them would have tried to kill me."

Her thoughts immediately went to Santana Lopez. She was the only person Rachel ever truly feared. Quinn was horrible to her, but she preferred to inflict emotional damage, slushies notwithstanding. Santana, however, was not against getting physical. Thankfully, Rachel usually avoided that by staying out of her way and keeping her mouth shut. There were several times when the other girl did try to attack her, but there was always someone there to hold her back.

"Sounds like fun," Ben replied.

"It was the best four years of my life," Rachel sarcastically said. "I guess part of me is thankful in some ways. Okay, maybe thankful is the wrong word. I just mean if it wasn't so bad, I may not have fought so hard to get where I am now, so maybe there is a reason for it."

Rachel really didn't know why she was telling him all of this. She generally kept all the less than glamorous parts of her life—namely high school—to herself while on a first date. She never wanted her dates to pity her or think she was weak in any way. She had made it through one of the worst high school experiences she could imagine and came out on the other side a stronger and more confident person in some regards. She may still be a little insecure about her looks due to the many taunts from peers, but her confidence in her singing ability never wavered. Plus, if she could make it through high school, a little rejection while auditioning was nothing.

"So, you said you have some friends involved in this poetry reading?" Rachel inquired, hoping to change the subject.

Ben nodded. "One of my roommates and his boyfriend."

"Oh," Rachel said, nodded. "That's nice."

"That's not a problem, is it?" Ben asked, his brows furrowing slightly.

"Of course not!" Rachel immediately replied.

"Good," Ben said, a small smile crossing his face. "My last girlfriend wasn't very cool with it."

"Well, I am more than fine with it," Rachel replied. "My roommate, Kurt, is gay. He has also been my best friend for the past four years."

Rachel decided to leave out the fact that she was raised by two men. She wasn't ashamed of them by any means, but she would rather the conversation not shift in that direction. If she did, Shelby might come up, which would undoubtedly lead to Beth.

"Hello, everyone, and welcome to Wonderland!"

Rachel was saved from saying anything else by a woman talking into the microphone. She was standing on the small stage, which was only just big enough for the three stools and microphone stand that was sitting on it. As she looked around the rest of the room, she realized how neat the bookstore looked. There were old, rustic bookcases all around the room, which held equally old looking books. There were battered looking signs hanging around the room, declaring what genre was featured in each section. White fairy lights were also strung along the ceiling and it looked like the nook near them was made for people to sit down and read.

As she continued to look around, she decided she would have to come back there one day while an event wasn't going on, so she could look over the shelves. She also wondered if Quinn had ever been there and made a mental note to tell her about the place in case she hadn't.

* * *

Rachel set her purse down with a sigh and heard the television immediately turn off. Before she could even take three steps, Kurt was walking into the room with an expectant look on his face.

"Tell me everything," he demanded. "I need to live vicariously, so leave out no details."

"I don't know if there is a lot to tell," Rachel admitted as she walked past him and into the living room to sit down. "The date started off fine, but—"

"Oh no," Kurt interrupted. "You didn't tell him about Beth and he panicked, did you?"

"No," Rachel replied. "I quickly realized there would be no need to bring that up because there would be no second date."

"He was a dud?" Kurt asked.

Rachel sighed. "Completely. He was nice and smart and good looking, but there was just no spark. I thought everything was going well in the beginning and that he definitely had potential, but it was all downhill."

"Oh, sweetie," Kurt said as he sat down. "What happened?"

"Everything was fine at first," Rachel said, setting her phone on the table, and curling one leg underneath herself. "After he got there, we were talking, but then the event started." Rachel gave a halfhearted huff. "Other than both coming from a small town, we had nothing in common. We barely talked at dinner except enough for me to learn that not only does he not like musical theater, but he doesn't even like music."

Kurt gasped and put his hand on his chest. "How can anyone not like music?"

"I was just as shocked as you," Rachel said with a shrug of her shoulders.

"I'm surprised you didn't walk away immediately," Kurt remarked.

Rachel laughed. "It crossed my mind." She looked around the room and noticed Beth's little easel sitting out. "Did you two paint this evening?"

"No," Kurt said, following her gaze. "She drew something with her markers while we watched Shrek." He leaned forward, grabbing the drawing from the table, and handed it to Rachel. "It's us."

"Is this Times Square?" Rachel asked.

"I think so," Kurt replied, looking over to get a better look.

"You even have your crown," Rachel said, nudging him.

Kurt glared at her, which only made her laugh. It was always nice coming home to him after a bad date. He always managed to make her feel better without even really trying. She just wished she could find those same qualities in someone who was romantically interested in her. She hadn't been in a relationship for over a year and she really missed it.

"Did you at least have a fun time with Beth tonight?" Rachel asked.

"More fun that you, it sounds," Kurt replied.

"This is why I should never listen to you," Rachel joked. "I could have been home watching Shrek, too."

"I think someone is calling you," Kurt said, nodding to her phone on the table.

Rachel leaned forward to see who was calling. "It's Quinn."

"Are you going to answer it?" Kurt asked, his eyebrow inching up.

Rachel briefly thought about letting it go to voicemail, but she knew that would be rude, so she quickly grabbed her phone before it stopped ringing. "Hello?"

"I didn't wake you, did I?" Quinn asked.

"No, I just got home, actually," Rachel said.

"Sorry, I know it's a bit late to call, and this is last minute, but this guy at work gave me three tickets to The Lion King," Quinn explained. "They're for tomorrow night. There was some family emergency, so he can't go now, and I thought maybe you and Beth would like to go if you don't have plans. Like I said, I know it's last minute, but I just—I don't know anyone else who would want to go."

It _was_ last minute, but Rachel didn't have any plans for the following evening, and she knew it would be something fun for Beth. She was always apprehensive about spending any extended period of time with Quinn, but turning the offer down seemed ridiculous.

"Actually," Rachel glanced at Kurt, "Beth and I are completely free tomorrow. What time is the show?"

* * *

**I will give you guys the same warning I put at the end of the last chapter of I Want You to Want me. I went from having no job to working full time, so I might have to update my stories less frequently. Instead of posting two weeks and then having a week off, I may have to go to posting every other week. Hopefully it doesn't happen, but I'm letting you know it's a possibility. It's just really hard to keep up right now, but maybe I'll be able to once I get settled in a little better.**

**As always, reviews are appreciated.**


	13. Is This Really Happening?

**Chapter 13 – Is This Really Happening?**

As Rachel approached the restaurant they agreed to meet at, she instantly spotted Quinn standing outside. The blonde had her hair up in a ponytail—much like she did when she was on the Cheerios—and was wearing a black dress that suddenly made Rachel second guess her own outfit. She, too, was wearing a dress, but it didn't look nearly as good as the one Quinn was wearing. Somehow, Quinn always had her second guessing her wardrobe even though she was far from the girl in high school who wore animal sweaters.

"Hello, Quinn," she greeted as she approached the other woman.

"Hi," she said, smiling, and then looking down at Beth. "Your dress is very pretty."

"Thank you," Beth said, sounding very shy.

"This place looks very nice," Rachel said, looking at the front of the restaurant.

"I've been wanting to try it," Quinn remarked. "I called ahead to make a reservation and to make sure they had vegan options."

"Thank you," Rachel replied. "Most people forget.

"It's hard to forget," Quinn said, smiling. "I remember the rant you gave Finn when he asked if you wanted a piece of beef jerky."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "I don't know why he could never remember. I discovered that he fed me beef while cooking dinner for me and I became violently ill when I found out what he did."

"That sounds like something he would do," Quinn said, shaking her head. "He always was a terrible boyfriend."

"Sometimes," Rachel agreed.

They stood silently for a moment before Quinn said, "Maybe we should go in."

"Yes," Rachel replied.

They walked into the restaurant and Rachel looked around. The inside was a little fancier than the outside suggested; it looked nice with its dark wood and deep red interior. There were also splashes of white around that lightened up the room a little.

"Fabray, party of three," Quinn said to the hostess.

"Right this way," the woman said.

The hostess led them through the restaurant to a table near of the back of the room. Rachel made sure Beth was seated before sitting down herself. As she was handed a menu, she glanced at Quinn; she was afraid things would become weird between them now that Finn had come up. It was something they had never really talked about and for good reason. The first time Rachel kissed him, he was dating Quinn, and the first time he truly broke her heart, he did so to go back to the blonde. Rachel always wondered if they would have become friends if it wasn't for Finn or if Quinn would have still hated her in high school.

"Did you ever decide on a class?" Quinn asked as she looked over her menu.

"Yes, Beth has attended dance class several times so far," Rachel answered.

"Do you like it?" Quinn asked, looking at the little girl.

Beth nodded and said, "Yeah."

"She's even made a friend," Rachel added. "There's this girl named Emma, who is around her age. A lot of the other kids are—" Rachel paused, trying to pick the correct word. "Well, they're rather pretentious, which they seem to get from their mothers."

Quinn eyebrow rose, but before she could say anything, the waiter came over to take their drink orders. When he left to get their drinks, she looked at her menu to figure out what she wanted.

"Do you know what you want, Beth?" she asked, glancing at the girl, who shook her head. "Do you need me to help you with it?" Beth shook her head again. "Okay, but let me know if you do, okay?"

Beth nodded and Rachel went back to her menu, immediately spotting a vegan eggplant parmesan that sounded perfect. It sounded so perfect that she didn't even bother looking over the rest of the menu.

"That was quick," Quinn commented when Rachel put her menu aside.

"I've been craving eggplant parmesan and they just so happen to have it here," Rachel replied.

Quinn smiled. "I'm glad I picked this restaurant, then."

"I know what I want," Beth said, putting her menu down.

Rachel didn't even have to ask what she was going to get. Her favorite food was pizza and any time it was on the menu, she wanted it. Considering this was an Italian restaurant, she felt it was safe to assume that there was a pizza product of some kind on the kid's menu.

"This place is nice," Rachel commented as she looked around. "Hopefully the food is as good as the decor."

"I've heard it is," Quinn replied. "This guy at work told me about it. Actually, he asked me out and tried to convince me to go by telling me how amazing this place is." Quinn shrugged. "It didn't help his cause at all, but the restaurant sounded good."

Rachel wondered if Quinn had a boyfriend and if that's why she turned the guy down. She realized she really didn't know anything about the other woman's life. She knew Quinn had a roommate and a little bit about her work and school, but that was it. Quinn was always a private person through high school—Rachel was fairly certain the blonde's two best friends, Santana and Brittany, didn't even know her that well—and she was apparently no different now.

"Why didn't you take him up on his offer?" Rachel asked, deciding to see if Quinn would open up at all.

"He wasn't my type," Quinn replied.

Rachel nodded; it wasn't a very detailed answered, but she knew it was the most she was going to get from Quinn.

* * *

Rachel smiled as Beth looked around, obviously excited to be at the theater. She had never seen her quite this excited before; she was definitely glad she accepted Quinn's invitation. She might be wary of Quinn and unsure about spending a whole evening with her, but if it made Beth happy, it was worth it.

"Thank you again for bringing us," Rachel said to Quinn. "Though, you really didn't need to pay for everything."

Quinn shrugged. "Don't mention it."

Rachel didn't know why, but the blonde insisted on paying for everyone at dinner. After some back and forth about it, she eventually relented and let Quinn pay for the meal. She knew Quinn could be just as stubborn as her—more so, really—and she knew they could be in the restaurant all night if she didn't back down.

"Can I go up there?" Beth whispered.

"To the stage?" Rachel asked and Beth nodded. "You can go look at it, but don't try to get on it, okay?"

Beth nodded again and hopped out of her seat. Rachel watched her closely as she walked over to it, but she didn't try to get on the stage. Instead, she stood near it, staring up at it.

"She seems excited," Quinn commented.

"I think this is the first time she's been to a Broadway show," Rachel said. "Unless she went with Shelby sometime. Kurt and I were talking only a week or two ago about taking her to one soon, but we couldn't decide on a show. He wants to take her to see Wicked, but I was afraid the flying monkeys would give her nightmares. She has them enough as it is; there's no reason to make them worse."

"She has nightmares?" Quinn asked.

Rachel sighed. "All the time. Some nights are worse than others; sometimes she'll make it through the night without having one, but they've been happening a lot lately. I don't even know what she's dreaming about, either. We've been doing everything her therapist says, but it doesn't appear to be helping very much. I suspect she's dreaming about the car wreck. I don't want to ask her, though, in case it's not that; there's no reason to unnecessarily bring up such a traumatic experience."

"Does she ever mention it?" Quinn asked, looking at Beth.

Rachel shook her head. "No."

"Does she ever mention her—Shelby?" Quinn inquired.

"She started to once or twice, but stopped," Rachel replied. "I tried to get her to talk about it at the time, but she just got really quiet and wouldn't say anything. I wish I knew what was going on in her head sometimes; she's just so quiet and doesn't like to talk about things."

Rachel glanced at Quinn, wondering if she should really be talking about this. She didn't want to flaunt the fact that she had Beth and Quinn didn't. Quinn may have willingly given Beth up, but it was obvious her senior year that she regretted it. When Shelby came to town with Beth, Quinn attempted to get her back by trying to make Shelby look like an unfit mother. Thankfully, Puck had enough sense not to go along with the plan and stopped it from happening, but it made Rachel wonder if she still wanted Beth. She knew Quinn wanted to be in the little girl's life—she did come to her, wanting to spend time with Beth—but she wondered if the blonde wished she had tried to get custody of her.

"I'm surprised you haven't taken her to a Broadway show yet," Quinn remarked. "I figured that was one of the first things you did."

Rachel laughed lightly. "I know, but there was so much going on that I honestly didn't think about it. Plus, she really didn't want to do a lot in the beginning, which I could understand. Her life went through an enormous change that would be hard on anybody. But she's opening up a bit more now and actually wants to go places. Just last weekend Kurt and I took her to Central Park, Times Square, and the Statue of Liberty."

"That sounds fun," Quinn replied.

"It was," Rachel said, smiling. "Before summer is over, I hope to take her to the zoo, the Children's Museum, and hopefully a few more of the tourist sights. It will have to wait until after next weekend, though; we're going to Lima for the weekend."

"Me too," Quinn said. "I managed to get all next week off, so I'm leaving tomorrow. I am not looking forward to it; I hate going back there."

"Why?" Rachel asked. "I mean, I can sympathize, but I just—I don't know."

"You think I should like it there because I was so popular in high school," Quinn remarked.

"Yes," Rachel said truthfully.

"I probably hated high school just as much as you did," Quinn replied. "I always wanted to get out of Lima, but I didn't think I would get to. I thought I would have the same life as my mother; I thought I would marry some wealthy guy and devote my life to raising our children. It didn't really cross my mind for a long time that I could actually leave and have the life I wanted, not the life I thought I would end up with. Going back is just a reminder of everything—of that life I didn't want.

"Plus, my relationship with my mother is a little complicated. She wanted me to stay in Lima to go to college, but I wanted to get far away from that town, which she didn't understand. I think she resents me for being alone now, and she refuses to listen to anything about my life. Even when I tell her something important, she acts like it never happened. It's frustrating because she doesn't want to know who I am now; I try to tell her something important and she pretends we never had the conversation."

Rachel frowned. "That's terrible."

"It definitely makes visiting a little awkward," Quinn replied. "We basically talk about nothing except for things like my grades and if I've met any cute guys." Quinn rolled her eyes. "It'll be a week of awkward silence and her pretending nothing has changed."

"Well, you could bring her over to the cookout my fathers are having," Rachel said with a shrug. "At least there will be other people around to distract her."

"I might just do that," Quinn said, smiling. "I'll let you know if we're going to come, so you can let your fathers know."

Rachel smiled back. "I'm sure my fathers would love to have you; they're really excited about the cookout and want as many people as they can get."

"How much longer?" Beth asked, sitting back down in her seat.

Rachel pulled out her phone to look at the time. "Just a few more minutes."

"I don't wanna wait," Beth complained.

"I know," Rachel said, laughing lightly.

Beth sighed and Rachel smiled at how eager she was; it reminded her a lot of the first time her fathers took her to a Broadway show. She couldn't wait for it to start and was just as impatient as Beth.

"Thank you again," Rachel said, looking over at Quinn.

* * *

As they walked out of the theater, Beth was wide-eyed and bouncing around. Rachel smiled at the sight of Beth this happy and watched to make sure she didn't skip off too far ahead of her and Quinn. She could tell the little girl loved every second of the musical, often watching Beth instead of what was happening on the stage. Beth looked like she was in awe the whole time and Rachel thought it was amazing to see someone watching a Broadway show for the first time.

"I have never seen her this happy," Rachel said, smiling.

"It looks like you're going to have to take her to more shows," Quinn commented.

"Definitely," Rachel agreed. "Maybe we can see a few more before school starts; it'll be much more difficult to do through the school year, but I think it might have to be a regular occurrence."

They stopped just outside the entrance to the theater and Rachel looked down. She'd actually had fun with Quinn this evening and was sad to see it was over. It was something she never thought would be possible—enjoying an evening with the blonde—but it was nice to be around someone that wasn't Kurt. Don't get her wrong, she loved Kurt and he would always be her best friend, but sometimes it was nice to have a night out with someone else. It was just strange to her that it was Quinn that she was enjoying the company of; if someone had told her earlier in the year that she would be thinking that, she would have laughed at them.

"I know it's getting late, but would you want to get coffee before you go home?" Quinn asked.

Rachel looked at Beth for a moment and then nodded and smiled. "I think it would be okay. I don't think Beth is going to be tired anytime soon; she seems far too excited to go to bed."

Quinn laughed. "Come on, I know a place that we can walk to."

Rachel walked over to Beth and reached out to take her hand. As she followed Quinn, Beth skipped along beside her, jostling Rachel's arm with every skip, but Rachel just shook her head and smiled.

The walk wasn't very far, and when Rachel walked into the coffee shop, she looked around in great interest. It was very different than the place she worked; this coffee shop was much more relaxed. The baristas were wearing their normal clothes and most of them were covered in tattoos. There were beanbag chairs littering one side of the establishment, near a small stage. The tables and chairs were all mismatched, but were all painted bright colors. It was an interesting place, but it didn't seem like a place she could imagine Quinn going to. In fact, it seemed like the type of place she would hate.

"You're wondering why I come here, aren't you?" Quinn asked, watching Rachel.

"The thought did cross my mind," Rachel admitted.

Quinn laughed lightly. "Once you try the coffee, you'll understand."

They stood in line behind two women that were holding hands and a large man with naked woman tattooed on the back of his neck. Rachel tilted her head, trying to figure out what was in the naked woman's hand; it took her a moment to realize, but then she blushed and looked down to make sure Beth wasn't looking up. Thankfully, the little girl was looking around, not paying attention to the man with the obscene tattoo.

"Do you want hot cocoa?" Rachel asked.

Beth nodded as she continued to observe her surroundings and Rachel looked at the menu. The line moved quickly and Rachel was thankful when the man in front of them moved away. When they placed their orders, once again, Quinn paid for the three of them. Rachel tried to protest, but was immediately shot down. She huffed and crossed her arms, but it only made the blonde laugh, which was not the effect she was hoping for.

As they sat down, Rachel took a sip of her coffee and nodded in appreciation. "I definitely understand now."

Quinn smiled. "I was a little skeptical when my friend recommended the place, but now I come here any time I'm in the area."

"That reminds me," Rachel said. "Have you ever been to this bookstore called Wonderland?"

Quinn shook her head. "I've never heard of it."

"You should definitely look it up," Rachel stated. "I think you would really like it. I had this date yesterday and he took me to a poetry reading there. The date was a dud, but as soon as I saw the bookstore, I knew I had to tell you about it. They had all these old books, which I thought you would appreciate."

"Why was the date such a dud?" Quinn asked.

Rachel shrugged. "There was just no spark there. Plus, he said he didn't like music, which was an automatic sign that there would be no second date."

"How can anyone not like music?" Quinn asked, frowning.

Rachel laughed and shook her head. "Don't ask me." She sighed. "It's too bad, really; he was nice and smart and good looking, but there was simply nothing there between us."

"I'm sure there's someone out there who's perfect for you," Quinn commented.

"I'm beginning to doubt it at this point," Rachel replied.

"You shouldn't," Quinn said quietly.

Rachel stared at Quinn for a moment as the blonde looked away, and then looked at Beth. "How is your cocoa?"

"Good," Beth said as she played with some of the sugar packets on the table.

"Just good?" Rachel asked.

Beth shrugged. "Really good."

Rachel took another drink of her coffee and looked at the time. She decided she should probably send Kurt a text to let him know they may not be home by the time he got off work but not to worry. Kurt tended to be a worrier, and she didn't want him thinking something happened to them.

* * *

After insisting they share a cab so it would be cheaper, they finally pulled up outside of Rachel's apartment building. She didn't understand why they went there first since Quinn's apartment was closer to where they were, but along the way, she realized it was probably because Quinn wanted to pay for that, too. Instead of arguing this time, Rachel just went along with it, vowing to herself that she would be the one to pay for everything if they ever did this again. She didn't like other people paying for her; even on dates she usually wouldn't let the guy pay unless it was someone she had been seeing on a regular basis for a long time.

"Would you like to come up?" Rachel found herself asking.

Quinn shrugged and, to Rachel's surprise, said, "Okay."

She didn't expect Quinn to accept her invitation—they had already spent the whole evening together and she expected the blonde to be tired of her by now—but she followed Rachel and Beth out of the taxi and walked up to the apartment with them. When she slid the door open, the lights were off, which meant Kurt wasn't home yet.

"Make yourself at home," Rachel said as she turned on the lights. "I'm going to get Beth ready for bed."

"I don't wanna go to sleep," Beth whined.

Rachel laughed as Beth rubbed her eyes. "You may not want to go to bed, but I know you're tired. Plus, it's way past your bedtime, and if you don't go to bed now, we won't be able to get up early and have breakfast before I go to work."

Beth crossed her arms but didn't protest further; Rachel shook her head at the sight and said, "I'll be right back."

Despite her initial reluctance to go to sleep, Beth nodded off quickly once Rachel began reading her a bedtime story. After pulling the cover over her feet, which she'd already kicked off, and turning on the nightlight, Rachel quietly left the room. When she walked into the living room, Quinn was sitting on the couch, looking at the book Kurt had left on the coffee table.

"Any good?" Rachel asked, sitting down on the couch.

"Not really," Quinn replied, flipping the page and then setting it down on the table. "I'd been thinking about buying the book, so at least I'll save myself the money."

"Well, if you change your mind, Kurt would probably let you borrow the book," Rachel said.

"Maybe," Quinn said, leaning back on the couch.

They set in silence for a solid minute before Rachel finally said, "I want to thank you again for tonight. It was a lot of fun and I know it's something Beth will never forget."

"I'm just happy you came," Quinn replied.

"Honestly, I almost said no," Rachel admitted. "I didn't know how spending the evening with you would go and I was a little apprehensive about it just being us."

"You don't trust me," Quinn stated.

"I—don't know what to believe about you," Rachel replied. "It's just hard to reconcile this Quinn with who you were in high school. I can see that you've changed, but there's always this voice in my head that reminds me of the things you have done in the past. I know it's not necessarily fair, but—"

"No," Quinn interrupted. "It's completely fair. I have done a lot of things that I'm not proud of, and most of them involve you. I will understand completely if you never trust me; if I were you, I know I wouldn't."

"I'm trying," Rachel replied.

"It's okay." Quinn shrugged. "You've already been more forgiving than I expected or deserved." She sighed. "It's getting late; I should probably go."

Rachel nodded as she stood. "For what it's worth, I want to trust you, and I do see who you are now."

"It's worth more than you know," Quinn replied quietly as Rachel walked her to the door.

Rachel stopped by the door and Quinn turned to her to say, "Thank you for coming tonight."

"I had fun," Rachel replied. "And I know Beth definitely enjoyed it, so thank you for inviting us."

"Do you think we could do it again sometime?" Quinn asked.

Rachel smiled. "I would actually like that."

"I'll call you next week and let you know about the cookout," Quinn said.

Rachel nodded. "Well, hopefully we'll see you there."

Quinn turned to leave, but then she turned back. "I, umm—"

Quinn paused and began to lean in; at first Rachel thought the blonde was going to give her a hug, but then she realized what was really happening and froze. The blonde paused just inches from their lips touching and Rachel hurriedly turned away. She couldn't quite decipher the look on Quinn's face, but her expression quickly turned emotionless.

"I'll call you," Quinn said, tuning away.

"Goodnight," Rachel automatically replied as Quinn walked into the hallway.

Rachel watched as the blonde walked away, wondering if she just imagined that or if Quinn Fabray really would have just kissed her if she hadn't turned away.

* * *

**Well, so far I've managed to mostly keep up with where I am supposed to be, so maybe I won't have to alter my posting schedule. Plus, at least for the next few weeks, I'm only working four days a week instead of five, which should make it easier. I'll let you know if anything changes, but at least things are looking a little better about it.**

**Reviews are always appreciated.**


	14. I Thought I Was Mistaken

**IloveDiannaAgron: I have absolutely no idea how this has anything in common with Imagine Me & You, so no.**

**Thank you to everyone for your comments; it was nice to know everyone liked the last chapter so much.**

* * *

**Chapter 14 – I Thought I Was Mistaken**

The moment Kurt pulled the rental car into Rachel's driveway, her fathers came running out of the house. She wondered how long they had been standing by the window, waiting on them to get there, but she knew her fathers, and they had probably been standing there for the past hour. It was wonderful to see their smiling faces, and the moment she stepped out of the car, they were both there to wrap her in a hug. The moment Leroy let go, he turned and picked Beth up, hugging her as well.

"That's enough," Hiram said. "It's my turn."

Leroy laughed and handed Beth off to his husband before turning and giving Rachel another hug. "I've missed you, sweetie."

"It's only been a month since you visited," Rachel pointed out, laughing. "But I missed you, too."

"Come in, come in," Hiram said, carrying Beth off toward the house. "Pizza is on the way; we thought you might be hungry considering it is lunchtime. And we ordered more than enough, so you're welcome to stay, Kurt."

"Sure," Kurt replied. "My dad's not coming home until this evening anyway and Carole's at work right now."

"Well, you know you can stay here as long as you like," Leroy said, clapping him on the shoulder.

"Can we show her?" Hiram asked as he stepped into the foyer.

"I thought we agreed to wait until after we ate," Leroy replied.

"Oh, who cares about that," Hiram said, waving him off. "The pizza won't be here for at least another thirty minutes; you know how slow they are."

"What are you two talking about?" Rachel asked, looking between the two men.

"Come this way," Hiram said, heading up the stairs.

Leroy rolled his eyes. "I swear that man doesn't know how to be patient."

They followed Hiram up the stairs and found him standing in the hall, outside of the guest bedroom that sat across from Rachel's room. She immediately noticed a small, glittery, purple sign on the outside that had Beth's name on it and Rachel wondered what her fathers had done. She didn't have to wait long; Hiram opened the door, revealing the room. What had once been the guest bedroom slash storage room was now a children's room.

"Oh my," Rachel said, walking into the room.

"I second that," Kurt said, following her.

"We may have gone a little overboard," Leroy stated.

"You don't say," Rachel replied in awe.

The room had a twin bed with matching vanity and rocking chair; a dollhouse that was so large, it was actually taller than Beth; a toy box that Rachel guessed was filled with every toy imaginable; a bookcase that was full of children's books; a storage cabinet that was opening, revealing a bunch of games and puzzles; and a corner of the room that was set up for what looked like painting. Her fathers had gone more than a little overboard. Rachel always thought her room was amazing growing up, but this went far beyond that. It had everything Beth loved and Rachel wondered how long they had been working on it.

"You two didn't have to do this," Rachel said once she got over the initial shock.

"We know, but we wanted to," Leroy replied.

"We wanted Beth to have a room to herself for whenever you guys visit," Hiram added.

As soon as Hiram set Beth down, she slowly walked around the room, taking everything in. When she opened up the toy box, as Rachel expected, it was full of dolls, stuffed animals, and a few other things. The last place she walked was the corner with the easel, where she grabbed a nearby box of crayons and began coloring on the blank piece of paper.

"I believe the room is a success," Leroy said.

"I can't believe you didn't put a television in here," Rachel joked.

"See, I told you we should have set up an entertainment system," Hiram said, putting his hands on his hips.

"I think she was joking, honey," Leroy replied.

Hiram looked at Rachel. "Oh—never mind then."

"That's probably the pizza," Leroy said when the doorbell rang. "This must be a record."

Leroy walked out of the room, but everyone else stayed. Kurt was wondering around, looking at the books on the shelves, and Rachel sat down on the bed, which was far more comfortable than any bed she had ever sat on before. Beth looked like she was having fun coloring with her crayons, so Rachel stood to join her father downstairs.

"Need any help?" she asked as she walked into the kitchen.

"You could help set the table," Leroy said, handing her some silverware while he walked into the dining room with some plates.

Rachel took the silverware and walked behind her father, setting out the forks and knives. They normally didn't eat at the table when they ordered pizza, but she guessed her fathers wanted a sit-down lunch since they did just get there.

"You _really_ didn't have to do all that," Rachel reiterated.

Leroy laughed. "We know, but you're grown up, and who knows when we are going to get grandchildren, so we thought it would be fun. You know us; we spoiled you as a child and we're going to do the same thing for Beth. It's just something we enjoy doing, so let us have our fun."

"She's never going to want to go home now," Rachel commented.

"That may have also been part of the plan," Leroy said with a grin.

Rachel gasped. "You knew she would ask to come back if you gave her an amazing room."

"Maybe," Leroy replied.

Rachel nodded. "Very well played."

"I thought so," Leroy said, shrugging.

As they continued setting the table, Rachel wondered if Beth would ever want to come out of her room or if they would have to bring the pizza to her. She loved coloring, but she also loved pizza, so it was really a tossup on which one would win out in the end.

"Did that girl ever call you?" Leroy asked.

"She called this morning," Rachel replied. "She and her mother are coming tomorrow."

Leroy nodded, but didn't say anything. Neither of her fathers ever referred to Quinn by her name; it was always 'that girl' anytime she came up in conversation. She knew they were wary of her just as much as Rachel was—probably even more so. They knew most of what she went through in high school and they knew most of that was caused by Quinn, so even though Rachel tried to explain that she had changed, their feelings about her hadn't.

"Are you still sure it's a good idea?" Leroy asked.

"It's too late now," Rachel replied. "The invitation is already out there; it would be rude of me to rescind it now."

Leroy sighed. "You're right."

Rachel was honestly surprised Quinn called her and said they were coming. After what happened Sunday, she didn't know if she was going to hear from the blonde for a while. She kept going over what happened in her head, telling herself that she must have gotten the situation wrong. There was no way Quinn Fabray almost kissed her. For one, as far as she knew, Quinn was completely straight; they fought over Finn throughout high school, not to mention the fact that she dated Sam Evans for quite a while and also dated—and had a child—with Puck. Plus, even if Quinn did lean that way, she spent all of high school telling Rachel how ugly she was. It was just inconceivable to Rachel that Quinn could ever be interested in her now.

"Are you alright?" Leroy asked.

"What?" Rachel asked, looking up.

"You have this far-off look on your face," Leroy replied. "And you put two knives next to that plate."

"Oh," Rachel said, looking down. "Yes, I'm alright." She cleared her throat as she exchanged the knife for a fork and put the remaining silverware with the last plate. "I'll go let everyone know lunch is ready."

As she headed for the stairs, she couldn't help but worry about how tomorrow was going to go. Her conversation with Quinn that morning was very brief and she was nervous about the thought of seeing her the next day. Then again, maybe she imagined everything and things would be perfectly normal.

* * *

Rachel grabbed some more Dr Pepper from the refrigerator and a few bottles of water to replenish the stock outside. A lot of people were already there, but Quinn and her mother were still not in attendance, and she wondered if they were even going to show up. Puck had been the first one there, eager to see Beth since he couldn't get off work the previous day to come over. He brought along his little sister, Abigail, who had been playing with Beth even though she was quite a bit older.

"Bring some Mountain Dew as well," Hiram said, popping his head into the kitchen.

Rachel grabbed a couple cans, trying not to drop what she was already holding. She walked into the backyard, juggling the cans and bottles until Finn jogged over and grabbed a couple of them out of her arms.

"Thank you," she said.

"You're welcome," Finn said, giving her a lopsided smile.

Together, they walked to the refreshment table and Rachel straightened up the drinks before making sure there was still enough ice in the large bowl and that there were plenty of cups.

"How's everything going in New York?" Finn asked as she straightened up a few of the cans.

"It's going well," Rachel replied.

"And she's doing good?" Finn asked, nodding to Beth.

"Well," Rachel automatically corrected. "And she's doing as well as can be expected considering everything that has happened. Kurt had been a major help with everything; I really don't know what I would do without him. He always watched her while I'm at work and they've really bonded."

"He talks about her a lot," Finn replied. "He told me about how you guys took her to, like, all those things we saw when we were there for Nationals."

"Yeah, that was a lot of—fun," Rachel said, distracted by Quinn walking through the sliding glass door.

Finn looked over his shoulder and frowned when he looked back at Rachel. "What's she doing here?"

"I invited her," Rachel replied.

"Are you two friends now or something?" Finn asked.

"I don't know if I would quite consider us friends, but she's been around some lately," Rachel said, shrugging.

"But why?" Finn asked.

"She is going to school in the city and wanted to see Beth," Rachel explained.

Finn frowned again. "And you let her?"

"It didn't feel right keeping Quinn away from her," Rachel said, wondering why Finn cared so much.

"Aren't you worried she's going to do something like she did with Shelby?" Finn asked.

Rachel really didn't want to have this conversation with Finn, so she said, "I should go say hello to our new guests."

Before Finn could say anything, she walked away, bypassing Quinn and her mom, and going back into the house. She walked to the sink and looked out the window at everyone in the backyard. Quinn and her mother were talking off to the side and the older woman kept looking over at Beth, shaking her head. By the look on her face, Rachel wondered if Quinn even told her mother that her granddaughter was going to be there. She didn't look very happy and eventually walked to the other side of the yard, sitting by herself and away from everyone else.

"What are you doing in here?" Kurt asked, causing her to jump.

"Just washing my hands," Rachel lied, turning on the faucet.

"Do you need any help with anything?" Kurt asked.

"The chips could probably be replenished," Rachel said as she washed her hands.

"They do seem to be going fast," Kurt commented. "I think Finn ate most of them, though; I swear that boy is a bottomless pit. I hope your dads bought a lot of food because they are going to need it with him and Puck here."

"Believe me, they bought plenty of food," Rachel replied. "The fridge was completely full yesterday of hot dogs, hamburger, and chicken." She scrunched her nose in disgust. "How anyone can eat any of that stuff, I will never know."

"Is this where all the cool kids are?" Puck asked as he walked into the kitchen with them.

"Clearly," Kurt said, smirking.

"Are you having a good time, Noah?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, it's awesome seeing Beth again," Puck replied.

"I'll take those out there," Kurt said, grabbing a couple bags of chips.

"Thank you," Rachel called after him.

"I gotta say, I was surprised Judy came to this thing," Puck said, walking around, and sitting down on one of the stools at the island.

"I have a feeling Quinn didn't tell her that Beth was going to be here," Rachel replied.

"That makes sense," Puck said scratching the back of his head. "She isn't really happy that she's in Quinn's life."

Rachel frowned. "Why not?"

Puck shrugged. "I dunno. You know her; she don't really talk a lot about stuff like that."

"Has she—does she have—" Rachel shook her head. "Never mind. I should go back out there."

"Need me to grab anything?" Puck asked, looking thoroughly confused by Rachel.

"You could bring a case of soda if you want," Rachel replied.

Puck hopped off the stool and grabbed two cases from the counter, following Rachel into the backyard. As Rachel looked around, she inadvertently locked eyes with Quinn, but looked away quickly. When she looked back, Quinn was turned away, saying something to Puck, who had walked over to her.

"Hello, Rachel."

The brunette looked over to find Burt standing a few feet away. "Hello, Mr. Hummel.

Burt laughed. "How many times do I have to tell you to call me Burt?"

"Sorry," Rachel said, smiling.

"Don't get me wrong, manners are great and everything, but this is me we're talking about," Burt said. "You and Kurt have been friends for far too long to be referring to me by my last name." He gave her a smile. "How's everything been going? I mean, Kurt tells me all kinds of stuff, but sometimes I wonder what he's leaving out."

"Things are going better than I expected they would," Rachel replied. "It's not all smooth sailing, but I think Beth has adjusted quite well, which I think I have Kurt to thank for. He's wonderful with Beth."

"I gotta say, I'm a little surprised," Burt said with a laugh. "Kurt didn't even like other kids when he was a kid, but I can tell he adores that little girl."

"The feeling is definitely mutual," Rachel said, looking over at Kurt, who was playing with Beth and Puck's sister.

"So, everything really is alright with you guys?" Burt asked. "You don't, like, need money or anything?"

Rachel shook her head. "Everything is perfectly fine, but thank you for asking."

"Alright," Burt said. "But if you guys ever need anything, don't hesitate to ask."

Rachel smiled and nodded; it was nice knowing there were so many people that cared and would be there if she needed them. Burt and Carole had always been welcoming, though, so it was really no surprise that he was here offering his help if she needed it. He gave her a one armed hug and walked away, leaving her alone again.

She looked around the yard and found Quinn looking at her, but she looked away the moment Rachel looked her way. Rachel's brows furrowed; the more things like this happened, the more she didn't think she was imagining or misinterpreting what happened the other night.

* * *

"What's up?" Puck asked, sitting down next to Rachel.

"Nothing," Rachel said, looking at his plate, which was loaded with food. "Are you really going to eat all that, Noah?"

"What? This?" Puck asked. "This is nothing."

Rachel shook her head. "Are you still having a good time?"

"Yeah, this is awesome," Puck said, sitting back in his chair.

"Do you have to work tomorrow?' Rachel asked.

"Nah," Puck replied. "Burt's closing the shop for the weekend. I was actually gonna ask you if I could stop by tomorrow and maybe take Beth out to the park or something. You can come of course. And I was sort of hoping it would be okay with you if my mom came. I just wanna let her meet Beth since she never got to see her. Beth won't know who she is, but I just wanted her to see her even if she won't know."

"I think that can be arranged," Rachel replied. "Maybe we can even all get lunch."

"Sounds cool," Puck said with a nod.

"Hey, guys," Finn said, coming over, and sitting down on the other side of Puck.

"Hey, man," Puck greeted.

Beth ran over from nearby and held out a bottle of orange juice. "Can you open?"

"Yes," Rachel said, taking the bottle, but she was unsuccessful in twisting the lid off. "Maybe not. Noah?"

Puck laughed and grabbed the bottle, easily twisting off the lid. "Weakling."

Rachel narrowed her eyes at him, but said. "Thank you."

"Thanks," Beth said when she was handed the bottle back.

"I can't believe how big she is," Finn remarked. "I remember when she was born and was, like, this big." He held his hands out, moving them until they were roughly the length of a baby. "It's a little crazy."

"Yes, she is growing up quickly," Rachel replied.

"What's it like—you know, raising her?" Finn asked.

"Dude," Puck said, looking at his friend.

"What?" Finn asked.

"It's okay," Rachel said. "It was a little weird at first; I didn't know what I was doing most of the time—I still don't, really—but I think we have a good routine down now. I go to work in the morning while Kurt watches her, and Kurt goes to work in the evening while I'm with her. It hasn't always been easy, but I wouldn't change anything."

"That's cool," Finn said, nodding.

"I was gonna ask you if maybe I could come back up soon," Puck said as he chewed a hamburger. "I don't know when I'm going to have off or anything, but I was thinking maybe some time at the end of the month or the beginning of August."

"I believe that would be fine," Rachel replied. "Just let me know a specific date once you have it figured out and I will see if I can get off work for a few days. And thank you for asking this time."

Puck smirked. "No problem."

"What is everyone doing over here?" Kurt asked, coming up, and sitting beside Rachel. "Vegetable?"

Rachel grabbed a few carrot sticks from his plate as she said, "We were just talking about Noah coming up soon for a visit."

"You mean he actually asked this time," Kurt joked.

"Keep it up and next time I'll just show up again," Puck said.

"You just showed up last time?" Finn asked.

"Dude, I was afraid they'd say no," Puck stated.

"Rachel wouldn't do that," Finn replied.

Rachel cleared her throat. "I'm going to go get something to drink. Does anyone want anything?"

"Anything hotdog," Puck said. "Maybe two."

Rachel shook her head as she stood; how anyone could eat that much food, she would never know.

* * *

It was dark outside and the fireworks would begin any minute. This may be the first time the Berrys had a cookout, but it wasn't the first time they watched the fireworks from their backyard. They lived close to where the city set them off, so they had the perfect view. Usually Kurt would come over, and Finn when he and Rachel were dating, but this was the first time they had so many people there to join in the festivities.

Rachel looked around the refreshment table to see if she needed to bring anything out. The food was long gone—Kurt was right about Finn and Puck being bottomless puts—but there were plenty of drinks left. She did wonder who was drinking so much Dr Pepper; every time she turned around, she needed to bring more out from the kitchen. Sighing, she walked toward the house because, once again, the Dr Pepper was gone.

She passed Quinn and Judy on the way, avoiding eye contact with both of them. She had yet to talk to either of them. Frankly, she was a little afraid of Judy, and after what happened earlier that week, she just didn't know how to talk to Quinn at the moment.

Just as she stepped into the kitchen, she heard the first crack of a firework going off. The beginning was always a little lackluster, so she knew she still had five minutes before she needed to be outside. Still, she hurried to grab a case of soda and when she turned, she lumped at the sudden appearance of Quinn in the kitchen with her.

"Hey," Quinn said.

"Hello," Rachel replied. "Are you having fun?"

"I would probably have more fun if you weren't avoiding me," the blonde said, giving her a pointed look.

"I'm n—"

"Don't tell me you're not avoiding me," Quinn interrupted. "I know you are, so don't lie."

"I'm—" Rachel sighed. "Fine, I'm avoiding you."

"Because of what happened on Sunday," Quinn said, but it was more of a statement than a question.

"Yes," Rachel replied.

"I'm sorry," Quinn apologized. "I shouldn't have tried to kiss you like that."

"No, you shouldn't have," Rachel agreed.

Quinn looked away. "I don't know why I did it; I know you're not attracted to women, but I guess I just had to try. I didn't mean to upset you."

"My reaction wasn't because you're a woman," Rachel replied.

"Your reaction was because of what woman it was," Quinn stated.

Rachel sighed. "How did you expect me to react? Considering our history, how could I ever predict something like that would ever happen? I mean, are you even gay or is this just another one of your games?"

Quinn flinched at the question. "I am."

"You are what?" Rachel asked.

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Gay."

"Since when?" Rachel asked.

"Since always," Quinn answered.

Rachel shook her head. "But you only ever had boyfriends. You even got pregnant!"

"I'm aware," Quinn wryly said. "Believe me, it took a long time for me to finally admit it to myself, so take your confusion and triple it. It's not like I grew up in an accepting, loving family. You know what they did to me when they found out I was pregnant. That was something I couldn't hide, but being gay—I could hide that. I actually thought if I could try really hard, it would go away. I wasn't until I moved to New York that I began accepting myself."

"Do people know?" Rachel wondered.

"A few," Quinn replied with a shrug. "People at school know, but the only people from Lima who know are Brittany, Santana, and my mother." She shook her head. "I actually thought telling my mom would change things between us; maybe she would finally get to know the real me, but like everything else she pretended as if I never said a thing."

Rachel was having trouble wrapping her head around this. She really thought she must have misinterpreted the other night, but here Quinn was, telling her that she was gay. Quinn Fabray was telling her that she was gay. That was something she never thought she would have heard in her life and she was having a difficult time comprehending what the blonde was telling her.

"Is everything okay in here?"

Rachel looked up to find Kurt standing just inside the kitchen. "Yes."

"You're missing all the fireworks out there," Kurt said.

With one last look at her, Quinn turned and headed out of the kitchen, leaving Rachel and Kurt alone. Rachel furrowed her brows as she sat on one of the stools, and Kurt walked over to her, resting his elbows on the island.

"Are you okay?" Kurt asked. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," Rachel lied. "Everything is fine. Quinn and I were simply discussing something."

Kurt nodded, but he didn't look very convinced. "Are you going to watch the fireworks now that your discussion is over?"

"Yes," Rachel said, standing up. "I wouldn't want to completely miss them."

"Come on," Kurt said, holding out his arm for her to take.

Rachel looped her arm through his and leaned her head against his shoulder. This wasn't how she expected her day to end; she didn't really know how she felt about it, so she was just going to go out there with Kurt, watch the fireworks, and try to put it out of her mind for the rest of the night.


	15. The Truth

**Chapter 15 – The Truth**

"Who is that?" Kurt asked, trying to look at Rachel's vibrating phone.

"No one," Rachel said, snatching it up so he couldn't see.

"No one has been calling a lot lately," Kurt remarked. "Is it Finn? You two didn't have some sort of dalliance while we were in Lima, did you?"

"Of course not," Rachel replied in exasperation.

"Then who is it?" Kurt inquired.

"I told you, it's no one," Rachel stated.

"Well, no one has been calling here repeatedly for the past week, which makes me think no one is actually someone," Kurt replied.

Rachel sighed. "It's just Quinn.

"Why are you ignoring Quinn?" Kurt asked

"I simply do not want to talk to her at the moment," Rachel said, not wanting to get into this conversation right now.

"Why not?" Kurt eyed her suspiciously. "Did she do something to you?"

Rachel shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "Not exactly."

"Did she try to do something?" Kurt asked.

Rachel didn't want to tell him that Quinn tried to kiss her. She was having a hard enough time trying to wrap her head around it without him knowing. He would want to talk about it and that was the last thing she wanted to do. Plus, if she told him about the almost kiss, she would be outing Quinn and she didn't know how the blonde would feel about that.

"Not exactly," Rachel repeated after a moment.

"Then what's going on?" Kurt asked. "I thought you two were finally putting the past behind and sort of becoming friends."

"We were—are," Rachel replied. "Listen, there's nothing going on, okay? I just don't feel like talking at the moment."

"If there's nothing going on then why were you two acting so weird at your fathers' cookout?" Kurt observed.

"We were not acting weird," Rachel lied.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Please, anyone with eyes could see it. You two only spoke once all night and the rest of the time you were blatantly avoiding her."

She hated how observant her best friend was; it was hard to get anything past him. He had always loved gossip, though, and was always on the lookout for something interesting. Sometimes it was nice—he was often observant enough to know when something was wrong with her—but at times like this, it was a nuisance.

"I was not avoiding her," Rachel replied. "I was trying to be a good hostess. Plus, I see Quinn often, so I was speaking to the people I don't get to see as often.

Kurt gave her a dubious look and said, "If you say so."

Rachel cleared her throat as she looked away. ."We should probably get ready; we wouldn't want to be late."

"Did you hear that, Munchkin?" Kurt asked. "Time to put the paint up."

Beth shot him a slightly disgruntled look from across the room that reminded Rachel very much of Quinn. She put the paintbrush down, nevertheless, closed the lid to her paints, and began walking to the kitchen. After her last brush got destroyed when she forgot to rinse the paint out, Rachel assumed she was going to clean her brush this time.

Rachel sighed and pouted. "I really don't want to go today."

She thought maybe after the first time it would be better, but bringing Kurt along the second time just seemed to exacerbate the problem. Sheila and her friends—or as Kurt referred to them, minions—made it no secret that they didn't want Beth in the class. Rachel did her best to ignore their catty comments; it wasn't always easy, but she wasn't about to make a scene with so many children around.

"I guess I should change," Rachel said.

"What's wrong with what you're wearing?" Kurt asked.

"Nothing," Rachel said, looking down. "I would just like to look my best."

Kurt nodded. "As a big su—" Kurt paused and watched as Beth walked by, "suck it to those bitchy mothers?"

Rachel laughed. "I don't know if I would have put it quite like that, but yes."

"Well, I already look perfect, so I guess I will help Beth get ready," Kurt said, nudging Rachel with his shoulder.

Rachel rolled her eyes at her friend and then nudged him back. She stood and began walking to her bedroom when Kurt called after her, saying, "So, everything is okay between you and Quinn?"

"Yes, Kurt," Rachel replied.

It was mostly true; she wasn't exactly angry with Quinn, just confused. She and Quinn had fought over Finn for nearly the entirety of high school, so for the blonde to come out to her was beyond a shock for Rachel. It was something she never saw coming and something she was still having a hard time fully believing.

* * *

Rachel, Kurt, and Beth walked into the dance studio and immediately ran into Sheila and one of her friends. They tried to slip by without being seen, but just when Rachel thought they had made it, the two women turned in their direction.

"Oh, you're back," Sheila said with a fake smile.

"Yes," Rachel said, squaring her shoulders, and making sure she was standing up to her full height, which was far below both of the women in front of her.

"I'm surprised," Sheila commented.

"Why is that?" Rachel asked, putting on a fake smile of her own.

"I don't know," Sheila said with a shrug. "I just assumed you would have other things to do. Most young people don't come to things like this."

"Yes, well, I _am_ here this week and I will be here every other week as well," Rachel stated.

"Subtle," Kurt whispered when Sheila gave another fake smile and turned her back on them, walking away.

Rachel narrowed her eyes at the back of Sheila's head before turning around to see if Zoe and Emma were there yet. As she looked around, though, she caught sight of a different blonde—one she wasn't expecting to be there.

"What is Quinn doing here?" she whispered harshly to Kurt.

"I invited her," Kurt replied.

Rachel scoffed, furrowing her brows together. "Why did you invite her? More importantly, why did you invite her without informing me?"

"We were talking at the cookout and dance class came up," Kurt said, shrugging. "She was asking about it, so I told her she should come along and see for herself."

"But why didn't you tell me?" Rachel asked.

"I didn't know I needed to," Kurt replied. "You two are friends now, aren't you? I asked what was going on with you two, but you said it was nothing, so I didn't think it would be a problem."

Rachel sighed. It was a problem, but she couldn't tell Kurt that; if she did, she would have to tell him that she was lying about everything else and he would want an explanation. Instead, she shrugged slightly and looked in Quinn's direction again. The blonde was walking toward them, and Rachel squared her shoulders again.

"Hey," Quinn said as she approached.

"Hello," Rachel stiffly greeted.

Kurt looked at Rachel, raising his eyebrow at her before looking at Quinn. "Hi."

Rachel felt a tug on her hand and looked down to see Beth looking at something across the room. When she followed her gaze, she spotted Zoe and Emma near the corner of the room. Zoe gave a little wave, smiling at her, and Rachel waved back.

"Can I go play with her?" Beth asked.

"Yes, you may," Rachel replied.

Beth let go of her hand and practically ran across the room to her new friend while Zoe walked toward them. She put her hand on Beth's head, ruffling her hair as she walked by and smiling at her.

"Someone's eager," Kurt remarked.

"Emma's been the same way all day," Zoe said, looking over her shoulder as she walked up to them. "She kept asking last Friday why class was cancelled." Zoe laughed. "She didn't care that it was the Fourth of July." She looked at Quinn. "Hi, I'm Zoe."

Quinn looked down at the woman's outstretched hand for a few moments and then took it, shaking her hand. "Quinn."

The smile Quinn gave was a smile Rachel had seen far too often. It wasn't even remotely sincere, but would appear so to anyone who didn't know the blonde. Rachel had seen it many times when Quinn was trying to get her way about something during high school, and it was clear to her that she already didn't like Zoe. Kurt obviously sensed it, too, because he looked at Rachel and gave her a knowing frown.

"Zoe's daughter, Emma, is also in the class," Rachel said, pointing across the room at the little girl with Beth.

"Yes, she's Beth's friend," Kurt added, stressing the last two words.

"That's nice," Quinn replied.

Rachel's noticed Quinn's shoulders relax a little, but she was still looking at Zoe rather intently. She didn't know what the blonde's problem was with the other woman—they had just met, after all—but she didn't want Quinn scaring her away. Emma was the first and only friend Beth had made since coming to New York and Rachel quite liked Zoe. She wasn't like a lot of the people she had met in the city; she was definitely more down to earth, but Rachel figured that was because she was one of the first people she'd met that wasn't trying to be on Broadway, be a model, or some other part of the entertainment industry. She didn't know the other woman _that_ well, but she hoped to become friends with her. Having a child, Zoe could definitely relate more to her situation than most people Rachel knew and she thought it would be nice to have a friend like that.

"Are you another roommate of Rachel's?" Zoe asked.

"No, I'm—a friend from high school," Quinn replied.

"Wow," Zoe said, smiling. "I don't think I'm friends with anyone I went to high school with. You guys are lucky to be able to stay friends like that."

Kurt hummed and said, "Yes, we're real lucky."

"It is _nice_," Rachel said and looked at Quinn, hoping she would get the hint.

Quinn crossed her arms over her chest, watching Zoe with far too much intensity, but at least she didn't look like she was going to say anything else.

"Did you guys have a good Fourth?" Zoe asked.

"Yes, I do think the cookout was a success," Rachel replied. "They're already talking about doing it again next year and inviting even more people. They're also talking about getting an even bigger grill."

"Did they just get that one?" Kurt asked.

"They did," Rachel replied, shaking her head.

Zoe laughed. "Well, it sounds like you had a good time."

"Another friend of yours?"

Rachel sighed at the sound of Sheila's voice and turned around. "Yes, why do you ask?"

"Oh, I was just curious," Sheila replied. "It must be nice having so many friends around to help you with your daughter. You are so young, after all, and I'm sure you could use."

Rachel bristled at the comment. "Wh—"

"Yes, it is nice that she has so many friends that are there for her," Quinn said, tilting her head as she gave a cold smile. "I think we're all here not only because we want the best for Beth, but because we know Rachel's going to be a huge Broadway star one day and we'll do anything to make sure her dream comes true. After all, it would be such a shame for someone as talented as her to end up in some mindless job where she's selling houses and then has to come home to a husband who's cheating on her with the nanny, which she had to get because she didn't have time for Beth."

Kurt and Zoe both looked away, clearly trying not to laugh, and Quinn remained looking at the older woman. Sheila narrowed her eyes while her friend scoffed, and Rachel wondered what they were going to do. Without saying a word, Sheila turned on her heel, walking away to the rest of her friends.

"I should go check on Emma," Zoe said, her voice laced with amusement.

"I'll help you," Kurt said, no longer hiding the fact that he was laughing.

"You didn't have to do that," Rachel said when she was left alone with Quinn, and the blonde shrugged but didn't say anything. "But thank you."

Quinn looked at her for a moment before saying, "You're welcome."

* * *

"Are you hungry?" Rachel asked when Beth bound up to them after class.

"Yes," she said with a nod.

"Would you like to join us?" Rachel asked, turning to Zoe.

"I would love to, but I have to get home," Zoe replied. "I'm working a late shift and I'm already cutting it close, so I need to run."

Rachel smiled at her. "I'll see you next week, then."

"Bye, guys," Zoe said, giving them a smile as she took Emma's hand.

Emma waved at them as she walked by and Rachel waved back. "Bye."

"What about you, Quinn?" Kurt asked.

"Oh, I don't think I should," Quinn replied.

"Why not?" Kurt inquired.

"I just—" Quinn paused.

"You should come," Rachel said when Quinn seemed to be at a loss for words.

"Are you sure?" Quinn asked.

Kurt's eyebrow rose when Rachel looked at him. "Yes, it's fine."

"Okay, I guess I will," Quinn said.

Rachel nodded. "Alright."

"Well, now that that's settled," Kurt said, looking between them with a curious look on his face. "Shall we go?"

"Do you want to go to our usual?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah," Beth replied. "Can we get ice cream first?"

Rachel laughed. "Maybe after we eat first, okay?"

"Okay," Beth said, sounding slightly disappointed.

In the past, any time Beth sounded the least bit disappointed, it made Rachel feel guilty. Luckily, she quickly learned that Beth was going to be disappointed sometimes, but she couldn't give in. She was the adult and she needed to do what was best, which wasn't always going to be what the little girl wanted. She'd just lost so much, though, and Rachel wanted to do everything she could to make her happy, so it was a battle sometimes, but she thought she was doing an okay job with it. She was certainly trying to do her best, anyway.

As they walked to the café, Kurt chatted away with Beth and Quinn, but Rachel remained relatively silent, too lost in her thoughts to really contribute much to the conversation. She was constantly watching Quinn, trying to look for—well, she didn't really know. Maybe just something that would give her some clue to who Quinn Fabray was, because every time she thought she had her partially figured out, she would do something to completely shatter everything Rachel thought she knew about her.

Along the way, she fell a bit behind everyone else and eventually Kurt looked back, noticing her lagging behind. She could no longer hear what they were saying, but Kurt clearly whispered something to Quinn and then turned, pausing while everyone else continued forward. As soon as she caught up to him, he fell in step beside her and stared at her profile as she tried to act nonchalant. He had that look in his face that he got when he wanted to talk, but this was definitely not the time or the place for that.

"So," Kurt said, still looking at her.

Rachel didn't say anything; instead, she smiled at him and continued walking in hopes that he would just drop it. This was Kurt, though, and she knew the chances of that happening were slim to none. Kurt didn't just let things go; he pushed and prodded until the person gave in and told him what he wanted to know. Luckily she'd had a lot of experience with it and had been known to hold out for months. Right now, she definitely needed time to think about everything without Kurt knowing, so, until she was ready to talk about it, she would stay silent.

"Okay, seriously, what's going on with you and Quinn?" Kurt asked.

"There's nothing going on," Rachel replied.

"You're my best friend and I know when something's wrong," Kurt stated.

Rachel shrugged. "I don't know what to tell you, Kurt."

"You could tell me the truth," Kurt replied.

"Who says I'm not?" Rachel asked.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Rachel, there are a lot of things you are amazing at, but lying is most certainly not one of them. Now, we can do this the hard way or we can do it the easy way. So, tell me."

"There's nothing to tell, Kurt," Rachel replied.

"You know I will get it out of you," Kurt stated.

"Not if there's nothing to get out of me," Rachel retorted.

"But there is," Kurt replied. "You and Quinn have barely said a word to each other all day, you have been ignoring her since the cookout, possibly before, and you've been watching her all evening like she's going to suddenly do something. I may not know what's going on, but I definitely know it's something, and the fact that you won't talk about it makes me think it's something big."

"Can we not talk about this right now," Rachel whispered when Quinn looked back at them.

"She's too far away to hear us," Kurt pointed out.

"Even if I was going to speak with you about it—not that there's anything to talk about, but if there was, this wouldn't be the time," Rachel replied.

"Fine," Kurt replied. "But we will talk about this again when we're alone."

Rachel knew Kurt meant well—prying was one of the ways he showed he cared—but she wished he would stop in this case. She wasn't going to talk to him about it any time soon, but she knew he was going to bring it up any chance he got. She'd experienced this many times, so she knew exactly what was to come. She wondered if she just explained it to him that she needed time to process it, he would leave her alone for the moment. It was worth a try, anyway.

* * *

"No," Kurt said, taking a drink.

"Please," Beth begged.

"I'm still eating," Kurt stated.

"Please," Beth said again, jutting out her lower lip.

Kurt sighed. "Fine."

Rachel shook her head, smiling. Her best friend never could seem to resist when Beth flat-out begged, which, thankfully, was not that often. She usually only did it when she really wanted something, so it retained its effectiveness since it didn't happen a lot. Of course, Rachel couldn't say too much about it because the one time Beth did it to her, she gave in as well. Sometimes she wished she had been around children more; maybe then she would be immune to their begging and wouldn't give in so quickly.

"Do you two want to come?" Kurt asked.

"I'm still eating," Rachel said, taking a bite of her sandwich for emphasis.

"Ditto," Quinn replied.

Kurt sighed again and said, "Okay, let's go get you that ice cream."

Beth's face brightened as she jumped down from her seat and rushed toward the door. The little girl loved ice cream far too much and it was something they always had to get when they were anywhere near a place that sold it. Thankfully, she didn't eat a lot of other junk food, so Rachel didn't feel too bad about letting her have ice cream every now and then.

"I'll be back," Kurt said. "Make sure they don't take my food away."

"Okay," Rachel said in amusement.

He walked away, leaving her alone with Quinn, which she was a little less amused by. They ate for a while in awkward silence; Rachel wanted to say something, but she didn't know what to say. She just wished she knew what was going through Quinn's mind right now, but she was too afraid to ask. The silence was driving her nuts, though, and she had to say something, so before she knew it, she was asking, "Why did you almost kiss me."

Quinn looked up and Rachel felt like a deer in the headlights. She had just blurted out the question with no thought and the moment it left her lips, she wished she could take it back, but the question was out there, and whether or not she wanted an answer, she was probably going to get it.

"I thought that was obvious," Quinn replied after another minute of silence.

"Well, not to me," Rachel said, looking down. "It came completely out of nowhere. I think we're finally maybe becoming friends and then you try to kiss me."

"I already apologized," Quinn replied. "I know I shouldn't have done it like that, but I guess it was one of the best evenings I'd ever had and I got lost in the moment."

"What does that even mean?" Rachel asked.

Quinn sighed. "I like you, okay."

Rachel shook her head; there was no way that was true. "You hate me."

"I don't hate you," Quinn replied. "I wouldn't be here if I did."

"How long?" Rachel asked.

"How long what?" Quinn asked back.

"How long have you—had feelings for me?" Rachel could barely get the words out; they felt so crazy coming out of her mouth, being directed at Quinn. "Is this why you bullied me in high school. Did you have feelings for me then, too?"

Quinn shook her head. "No, I didn't have feelings for you in high school. This is a more recent development." Quinn looked down. "I bullied you in high school because I was jealous of you."

"Jealous?" Rachel asked. "Of me? You had everything in high school; what would you have to be jealous over?"

"I told you before about how much I wanted to get out of Lima," Quinn replied. "I knew you were going to be one of the few people to get out of that town and I hated you for it. Plus, you were always screwing up my plans. I thought I would marry Finn and live out the life I thought I was supposed to have, but you kept getting in the way of that. So, yes, I was jealous of you, so I did a lot of things I'm not proud of."

"So—how recent of a development is it?" Rachel wondered.

"I don't know," Quinn replied, cradling her glass of water in her hands. "When Puck tricked us and I first saw you at the restaurant, I was surprised at how attractive you were."

"I haven't changed that much since high school," Rachel pointed out.

"I know," Quinn replied. "I realized how wrong I was about you back then. The more I came around, the more I realized I was actually attracted to you. Believe me, it was a surprise for me too, and it was never my plan to spring it on you like that. I wasn't even going to tell you anytime soon because I know you still don't trust me and I didn't want you to think it was some trick I was playing on you."

"That did cross my mind more than once," Rachel admitted.

"Can we both just forget that I tried to kiss you?" Quinn asked. "Because I do want to be your friend and I hate how weird things are right now. And unless you tell me to go away, I have no intention of doing so. I love seeing Beth and I like having you and Kurt as friends and getting to know you guys."

She knew it wasn't possible to forget that the other woman attempted to kiss her, but she said, "Okay."

"Thank you," Quinn replied. "And I promise I'll never try to do it again."

Rachel nodded and smiled slightly. She believed Quinn when she said she wouldn't try it again, but she wished she could forget that it ever happened the first time so things could go back to the way they were. She didn't begrudge Quinn for it, but this was all just too much for her at the moment.


End file.
